I'm 18, been with my boyfriend 9 mnths now... ashamed to say I fake even enjoying it all the time... I can't really feel anything down there... I'm not comfortable or confident enough with myself to masturbate. I've had like one orgasm and that wasn't with him it was with my ex who was extremmmmely good with his... errm... anyway slightly sidetracked... oh also... I can't do it doggy because I immediately get terrible cramps the minute he starts thrusting and the cramps last for like 4 days... it feels like something is bangin into my stomach it hurts so bad... Help... Pleeaassee xx

Your first issue seems to be your discomfort with masturbation... Treat it like "Practice"-you should get your "practice" in at least 3 times a week, understand and feel what it is like to be aroused and climax in a comfortable surrounding first-then start to do the same with your partner. Practice makes perfect!

The secondary issue is I think you will find that your partner is unaware of your discomfort-I think/pretty sure that you are not telling him that ramming into your abdomen is not "helping you to feel close/aroused " by him.

As always, I think you need to be calm and careful about how you approach the subject and remember to COMMUNICATE!

P.S. it's probably too late to talk once you are getting Pile-driven. You should talk BEFORE hand.

MOST women cannot climax from intercourse.

You NEED to learn to masturbate.

You ALSO need to stop lying to your boyfriend. He's never going to get you there if you give him false signals as to what works.

And... as I say EVERY time... if you can't TALK about sex with your partner, then you should NOT be having sex with him.

Synnen is absolutely right. Not all women will ever experance a vaginal orgasm.


Lying to your lover is the absolute worse thing you can ever do. This relationship will not work if you are not honest with him. And if he loves you, he will be patient and understanding with you and willing to help.

I'm sure once you tell him, he will be able to adjust so that it won't hurt, and also you should try new positions. I find that missionary hurts me very much, but on my knees (doggy style) does not.

I suggest you visit a sex store, either online or a local shop, and get yourself a vibrator. You NEED to learn how to make yourself feel good before you can show him anything at all about your body.

Good luck hon.