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-   -   Wanting to date a 16yr.old (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=378620)

  • Jul 22, 2009, 12:28 PM
    shawnee09
    Wanting to date a 16yr.old
    Im a 23 year old woman who was dating a now 20 yr.old man and we don't go together anymore but his 17 yr.old brother likes me I like him anplus he's so mature for his age.


    My question is: Will I get in trouble for dating him? Is that a bad thing? What should I do?
  • Jul 22, 2009, 12:32 PM
    sweet1028

    As a woman of 23, you should already know that women mature a lot faster than men. The boy of 17 is still learning the ropes of relationships, he is not going to be what you are looking for in the long run. An older man who is really mature and doesn't just act more mature for their age would be better for you. The only way it would probably work if you were more immature than mature.

    As for getting into trouble... it all depends on the state laws where you live. I'm not sure if it is the same everywhere, but in this state it would be against the law because you are dating a minor. Good Luck!
  • Jul 22, 2009, 12:54 PM
    Justwantfair
    You have this under dating so I am not going to address the legality of dating a 17 year old, but most states list the 'age of consent' as 16, so it does depend on where you live.

    I would doubt that you are mature since your initial relationship was with someone three years your minor and now you are wanting to date his brother who is six years your minor.

    So first we could talk about the character and maturity of a woman who would date someone and then start dating their brother... it is completely inappropriate to date within and through a family. Once you are dating one, that makes the rest of the siblings and immediate family (sometimes even extended family) OFF LIMITS.

    Now we can talk about the six year age difference, which is quite substantial. Let the boy worry about school and you worry about growing up.
  • Jul 22, 2009, 12:59 PM
    Torrid13

    Why you, at 23, would want to date a 17 year old is beyond me. You would not be making any progress as far as relationships go, and more than likely you'll be doing most of the work, and possibly being more of a "mommy" figure.

    Plus, it's your EX'S brother. HELLLLOOOOOOO!
    If you're trying to get revenge on your ex by dating his brother, you're going down a path that will not only make you look sick, but manipulative as well.

    Walk away and find someone your OWN age.
  • Jul 22, 2009, 12:59 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    There are no laws on dating, there are laws on having sex, in some places that would be OK.

    From a personal standpoint, if it was a man, we would all call him a pediphile going after a child. So sex's reversed I would say it is same difference
  • Jul 22, 2009, 01:24 PM
    jmjoseph
    Why is this titled " Wanting to date a 16 year old"?And you're talking about a 17 year old. Did you ADD a year to make it sound better? If so, it didn't work. You're an adult( supposedly), why would you want to date someone in high school? PLUS, it's your ex-boyfriend's LITTLE brother. Do you have a little sister? How would you feel if the table was turned?
  • Jul 22, 2009, 01:34 PM
    s_cianci
    Will you get in trouble for dating him? no. But if there's sexual intimacy the age difference could have some legal repercussions with you bearing the brunt of it.
  • Jul 22, 2009, 01:39 PM
    ScottGem

    Legally, if you have sex with this CHILD you could find yourself with a statutory rape charge.

    But woman, you need to wake up. This is not a relationship you should even be thinking about. The purpose of dating is to find someone who may become your lifelong partner.

    Frankly, the only reason people will think that you to are together IS for sex.
  • Jul 22, 2009, 03:59 PM
    genesisz

    I don't think you should date you man brother. It going to be so werid. But it really your choose but its relly up to up.
  • Jul 23, 2009, 01:47 AM
    jmjoseph
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by genesisz View Post
    i dont think you should date you man brother. it going to be so werid. but it really your choose but its relly up to up.

    ?
  • Jul 23, 2009, 04:33 AM
    N0help4u
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by jmjoseph View Post
    ?!

    You should see the rest of their txt speak complicated by the spelling and grammar :rolleyes:
  • Jul 23, 2009, 04:34 AM
    danielnoahsmommy

    Nothing good can come of this!
  • Jul 24, 2009, 10:30 AM
    shelbybelle13

    Well you know that's against the law right?and you never date your exs brother just think about how that makes you look??
  • Jul 24, 2009, 10:42 AM
    N0help4u
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by shelbybelle13 View Post
    well you know that's against the law right?

    Depends on the laws in their state/coutry
  • Jul 24, 2009, 10:49 AM
    mudweiser

    So if I 17 year old kid likes you -- you want to date him?

    I'd like to ask, do you have any issues with yourself? Really, your 23 years old- a 17 year old boy is really just a boner with legs and I really doubt he wants to have settle down, he's not even in college yet. Seesh and what would his mother think?

    Step back. Picture a 23 year old woman dating a 17 year old. Don't lie to yourself, just be honest. How would that look? If that's not important to you then what would that say about the 23 year old? --- You don't have to answer those questions on here, you can just ask yourself.

    Well good luck to you.

    Sarah
  • Jul 24, 2009, 12:24 PM
    JudyKayTee
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by shelbybelle13 View Post
    well you know that's against the law right?and you never date your exs brother just think about how that makes you look????



    Please post the law you are referencing. I am unaware of any law about dating at those ages.
  • Jul 24, 2009, 12:28 PM
    jmjoseph
    I'm thinking this kid is really 16. Just got his driver's license, doing back to school shopping with his mom's credit card. She's going to make some kid " big man on campus", when she picks him up in the afternoon, when the bell rings. Will she help him with his homework though? She might not need to.
  • Jul 24, 2009, 12:29 PM
    N0help4u

    I know that some states law is that any body between 16 and 18 can only date 4 years older
    Than them but some states do not put an age limit.
    OP says 16 then 17 assuming they mean 17
    And she is 23 SOME states it may be illegal
    So you (shellbybelle) can't make a general statement that it is against the law.
    OP hasn't stated where she is from.
    Some countries a 15 yr old could marry a 44 yr old I do believe.
  • Jul 24, 2009, 06:01 PM
    ScottGem
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by N0help4u View Post
    I know that some states law is that any body between 16 and 18 can only date 4 years older
    than them but some states do not put an age limit.
    OP says 16 then 17 assuming they mean 17
    and she is 23 SOME states it may be illegal
    so you (shellbybelle) can't make a general statement that it is against the law.
    OP hasn't stated where she is from.
    Some countries a 15 yr old could marry a 44 yr old I do believe.

    ow

    There are no laws that I know of that regulate dating. All the laws deal with sexual activity between people.
  • Jul 24, 2009, 06:03 PM
    N0help4u

    Yea I guess I forgot to mention the distinction when I was replying to shellbybelles statement

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