OK so I need helppp!! 11 months ago the love of my life decieded that we should end our relationship but I'm still so hurt by this. We are both 26 years old and have a 2 year old son together. We met in high school and wound up both going to the community college nearby, we started seeing each other midway through our freshman year. I fell in love with him we had our son and then we got engaged. I thought that my life was so complete until he broke up with me, he said we weren't meant to be and he didn't want to marry me. I was so confused as to why that I begged for him back, unfortunately I found out that he had met someone else and had been cheating on me for the last year of our relationship. Its been 11 months and he has started calling me again and coming to my house to see our son and wants me back... I love him and I want him back also but I'm afraid he's going to betray me again. Please help me!

I'm sorry about the pain you're going through. :(

I wouldn't take him back, though. I understand he's your son's father... but... I think taking him back would really cause some issues down the road. He doesn't respect your feelings or you in general, and he most likely is trying to get you back because his other relationship fell through and you're "safe."

He'll probably drop you again as soon as he finds someone else. Don't put yourself, or your son through that. I just don't think it's a good idea.

But that's just me.

I see what torrid meas, but maybe he was just going through a bit of chrisis and starting thinking 'this is the rest of my life, do I want this'. The thought that this is the rest of my like can scare people.
Also, I obviously don't know anything about your relationships, but I always hear that people have affairs beacause their relatioship get too 'boring' in a way. If you do get back together, baybe try to le him know you appreciate him more.

He cheated on you! He didn't have the decency to end things with you beforehand... he held on to both you and this new girl until things were working out better for them, and THEN he decided to throw you out like last week's garbage.

The man is a snake either way you look at it. I wouldn't give him a chance in hell. Let him be a father to his son and that's it, otherwise the possibility is VERY high he would do it again.

The trust is going to be SO hard to rebuild, and unless you want to invest a LOT of money into couples therapy then I wouldn't bother one bit. From the way you depicted everything, it doesn't sound like he's sorry one bit for what he did, which means "repeat offender" in my book.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by phoebe123

i see what torrid meas, but maybe he was just going through a bit of chrisis and starting thinking 'this is the rest of my life, do i want this'. the thought that this is the rest of my like can scare people.
also, i obviously dont know anything about your relationships, but i always hear that people have affairs beacause their relatioship get too 'boring' in a way. if u do get back together, baybe try to le him know u appreciate him more.

---

That's the lamest excuse for cheating on someone. Here's a thought- if your relationship is too boring or you have a "crisis"... grow some balls and end the relationship before cheating on your fiancée for almost an entire year.

I know there are extenuating circumstances, but people who cheat usually do it more than once. There's no excuse.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by phoebe123

i see what torrid meas, but maybe he was just going through a bit of chrisis and starting thinking 'this is the rest of my life, do i want this'. the thought that this is the rest of my like can scare people.
also, i obviously dont know anything about your relationships, but i always hear that people have affairs beacause their relatioship get too 'boring' in a way. if u do get back together, baybe try to le him know u appreciate him more.

---

Well, sometimes I get bored with college, but that doesn't mean I go and burn down the campus!