Hi

I just turned 28 am am married for 2 1/2 years now.we know each other for 7 years now. We love each other very well.the only prob I have here is I want a child but my husband doesn't one any.he will give me 100 excuses for this,too much expenses,he can't bring up the kid well.etc, I would love to have one by next year but when we have sex, he will never do it fully,in the sense,he will ejaculate outside me.it depressed me a lot.as I love to have one before I turned 30. How do I make hi to ejaculate inside me.as he's very stubborn. Please help.

I need your help here.. how do I make my husband to ejaculate into me.

Pleas help!:(

You really should never trick him into getting you pregnant by going against his wishes like that. You need to convince him another way. Like maybe work on a budget to show that you have figured out how to afford a baby on your income.
Tell him how much it means to you.

If you trick him he could end up miserable and making you miserable or even leaving you for pulling a stunt like that.

Hmmm I had tried taled to him and everything,I know he likes baby as well,but he;s telling me that I can look after my niece,rathe then having baby to our self.as my sis is divorced so he's thinking that we shd look after my niece,well I love my niece a lot,of course I will take care of her and I want a child for myself... please help if there's any other way onthis matter.I had spoke to him about budgetting and everything,he had already decided shouldn't have baby.but I want a child.how do I convince him

You probably can't convince him. It sounds as if his mind is made up. Does he realize that ejaculating outside of you does not prevent pregnancy?

He should be made aware of the fact that your optimal time for having a baby is in your 20's.

The older you get the more difficult it becomes to get pregnant.He should also know that it may take up to a year to get pregnant.

Did you ever have a discussion about children before marriage?
Did he agree that he wants children someday?

If he is going back on his word ,that would be very unfair and perhaps you need to bring in a third party,family or friend to help you discuss this.

I can't advise you on how to trick him into getting you pregnant because I think that is dishonest and there must be a better way to approach this.
I think tricking him would create some serious problems down the road.For you and possibly for your child.

You can try to make him understand that it is an honor to him that you want to have his child and that many women have an emotional need to give birth and nurture a child.

I am sure he would not want to see you become depressed.Many women who are childless and desire a baby do suffer from depression.

Perhaps counseling would benefit you.If he has gone back on his word ,he should have to answer for that as well.That is a deal breaker ,in my eyes at least.

YOu have an impass here, he has an equal say in having a child. Its obvious he doesn't want one... try to trick him into it then its going to get really ugly, and I mean REALLY ugly.

I think marriage counseling is in order here, perhaps decide if its time to part ways if children mean that much to her and he really really doesn't want them.

If he is dead set against babies and it is the deep desire of your heart then maybe you two just aren't compatible

Has he always not wanted a child? If so, then you shouldn't have married him. I can say that I work with a guy who was "tricked" into being a father. His wife stopped taking her birth control pills. He still to this day is resentful, and has very little to do with his baby girl. Do not trick him. Maybe you SHOULD keep your niece, maybe then he will see how much joy a child can bring. Good luck, and GOD bless your family.

I agree with not tricking him or 'making' him. Bad idea.



If you love your husband, and do not wish for the marriage to end, I would say give him time. He may change. Continue to let him know how much you want a child and let him think about it.

Absolutely don't agree with tricking him - and I'm concerned that he (and perhaps OP) believe withdrawing is a means of effective birth control.

What happens if you get pregnant despite this method?

Interesting side note (at least to me) - some years ago I was madly in love with someone who had semi-grown children. We were engaged. I wanted kids, a picket fence and a Collie. He did NOT want kids (said he had done that), did NOT want a picket fence (likewise) and was neutral on the Collie part.

I just couldn't accept the no kids, live in a condo in NY way of living and broke the engagement.

Some time later he contacted me and had rethought things (yes, he wanted children; yes, when we had children we would move to the suburbs) and I was afraid what OP is going through would happen to me - I've never been sure he didn't have a vasectomy between breaking up and contacting me again. So that was the end of the relationship.

He was sort of the "one who got away."

We both went on to marry other people. I got stepchildren, a picket fence and a German Shepherd. He had no other children and continued to live in NYC.

When you are on such opposite ends of a situation as OP and her husband I don't know how you can make a relationship work.

Hmmm... well he loves baby I know that because when he sees friends child he will play and talk to them very nicely.I know he loves child,but he's just scared of the expenses and everything.well once when we got married after few months I had paid in my abdomen,I told him maybe am pregnant,the pain is such.. he told well that's okay,if your pregnant,he's ready but then when I went to medical centre actually its just an urinatary infection due to sex... I wasn't pregnant. Since then he's very cautions,once he accidentally ejaculate in.. he's scared I might get pregnant,so we bought pills.. and that was 2 years ago.. I wasn't ready to have baby.but now I want baby.I am sure,he will be fine... once we have baby.. he's very caring and everything.. so if I have baby I won't feel bored,and to be frank am depressed when I thinka about it.. please give me a solution to get pregnant with his or her baby... it won't make things worse... he's not like other man out there who will torutre or take revenge on me.. he truly loves me.. please help me.. give me some ideas to convince him.. guys please help

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Originally Posted by luvie

hmmm...well he loves baby i know that coz when he sees friends child he will play and talk to them very nicely.i know he loves child,but he's just scared of the expenses and everything.well once when we got married after few months i had paid in my abdomen,i told him maybe am pregnant,the pain is such..he told well thats okay,if your pregnant,he's ready but then when i went to medical centre actually its just an urinatary infection due to sex...i wasnt pregnant. since then he's very cautions,once he accidently ejaculate in..he's scared i might get pregnant,so we bought pills..and that was 2 years ago..i wasnt ready to have baby.but now i want baby.i am sure,he will b fine...once we have baby..he's very caring and everything..so if i have baby i wont feel bored,and to b frank am depressed when i thinka bout it..please give me a solution to get pregnant with his or her baby...it wont make things worse...he's not like other man out there who will torutre or take revenge on me..he truly loves me..please help me..give me some ideas to convince him..guys please help

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I am worried that you want a child so that you won't feel bored. If your life is boring and you want to fill it with something then I think that you need to look elsewhere. Not only is it irresponsible to want to make your husband have a child that he doesn't want , it's irresponsible to bring a child into the world to fill your own need for entertainment.

My advice is to back off and stop trying to convince your husband. Let the issue go and concentrate on filling your life with other things for a while. Have a good time with your husband, be loving and enjoy your life with him. He may feel more like having a child when you stop nagging him, he sees that you're happy with him and that your life is good. Be honest with him and let him know that you're prepared to wait a while, until he's ready. He will be - you just need to give him time.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by luvie

hmmm...well he loves baby i know that coz when he sees friends child he will play and talk to them very nicely.i know he loves child,but he's just scared of the expenses and everything.well once when we got married after few months i had paid in my abdomen,i told him maybe am pregnant,the pain is such..he told well thats okay,if your pregnant,he's ready but then when i went to medical centre actually its just an urinatary infection due to sex...i wasnt pregnant. since then he's very cautions,once he accidently ejaculate in..he's scared i might get pregnant,so we bought pills..and that was 2 years ago..i wasnt ready to have baby.but now i want baby.i am sure,he will b fine...once we have baby..he's very caring and everything..so if i have baby i wont feel bored,and to b frank am depressed when i thinka bout it..please give me a solution to get pregnant with his or her baby...it wont make things worse...he's not like other man out there who will torutre or take revenge on me..he truly loves me..please help me..give me some ideas to convince him..guys please help

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I think you should volunteer at some facility that takes care of children. It will give you something useful to do and some experience with children. Also it will give you joy and happiness. You say " please help", unfortunately, there are no answers that will "make" him want to have children. That's between you and him. Good luck to you.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by luvie

hmmm...well he loves baby i know that coz when he sees friends child he will play and talk to them very nicely.i know he loves child,but he's just scared of the expenses and everything.well once when we got married after few months i had paid in my abdomen,i told him maybe am pregnant,the pain is such..he told well thats okay,if your pregnant,he's ready but then when i went to medical centre actually its just an urinatary infection due to sex...i wasnt pregnant. since then he's very cautions,once he accidently ejaculate in..he's scared i might get pregnant,so we bought pills..and that was 2 years ago..i wasnt ready to have baby.but now i want baby.i am sure,he will b fine...once we have baby..he's very caring and everything..so if i have baby i wont feel bored,and to b frank am depressed when i thinka bout it..please give me a solution to get pregnant with his or her baby...it wont make things worse...he's not like other man out there who will torutre or take revenge on me..he truly loves me..please help me..give me some ideas to convince him..guys please help

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The fact that he likes/loves other people's children doesn't mean he's emotionally or financially ready to be a father.

You think if you get pregnant everything will be fine. He obviously doesn't think that or he wouldn't be taking precautions.

Go to a marriage counsellor; get a fish (I'm not sure you are emotionally or financially ready to even care for a puppy, quite frankly); get a job.

VOLUNTEER in your community. Help feed the hungry. Help care for the homeless.

Do something other than fixate on having a baby with a man who at this time doesn't want a baby.

Sorry to be harsh but I don't think anyone here is going to help you "convince" a man who doesn't want to have a child to have a child.

Read the legal threads. Read what everyone who has forced this issue has to say. Many of them are posting on the legal threads because that baby wasn't such a good idea after all.

Read through your posts with the eyes of a stranger and let us know what you think, what your advice would be.

Noo that's not a good idea... my husband doesn't like pet,I love puppy,but I can't have one.. though.. I am working in a good reputated company here... im trying to utilise my time to the max but at a point.. I feel bored,I just need someone 3rd person in my family.. child..

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Originally Posted by luvie

noo thats not a good idea...my husband doesnt like pet,i love puppy,but i can't have one..though.. i am working in a good reputated company here...im trying to utilise my time to the max but at a point..i feel bored,i just need someone 3rd person in my family..child..

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I still think that you should NOT be looking to have a child to ease your boredom. If you need a third person in your life get some good friends.

Hmmm well I feel friends are just temporary.. they can't be our family member at all... its just hard... please give me other good suggestion so t hat my husband will change his mind soon or next year..

You're a woman you know how to get a man to ejaculate inside of you, but you don't need to be trying to get pregnant without his knowledge! #1 that's just wrong #2 and will probably make things bad.

You need to sit down with your husband and seriously discuss this issue and make sure that he is not just listening to you, but that he actually hears you and get it all out.

Before you do that however you need to sit down with yourself and ask yourself a few questions#1 How bad do you want a baby? #2 did you know your husband did not want kids before you got married? #3 is what you want worth risking what you have? &#4 we have heard excuses about why he doesn't want any kids , but we have not heard anything about why you do?

You agreed to share your life together with this man so obviously he can't be that bad a person. Sometimes we want something so bad that we don't see why we can't or don't have what we want? We only know we want what we want?
You just really have to talk it out together and see where it leads.
I wish you the best of luck.

Thanks Hot4 Scott.well yeaa I agree your point.I should sit & talk to him again... hope he will understand.. thanks..