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-   -   Attempting custody from son's mother (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=372176)

  • Jul 5, 2009, 10:50 AM
    pavilsko
    Attempting custody from son's mother
    I am in a sticky situation. My once fiancé is the mother of my 2 soon to be 3 year old son. Come to find out she is pregnant again one month after moving out of my house with only a $1000.00 gross income. She is now 5 months pregnant. I want to try for physical custody since her family and I have begged her to get a full time DAY job instead of a night time Karoke DJ. The grounds in court that I was going to go on is Child Abandonment since she drops of the son at NIGHT care at 3 PM and doesn't pick him up until 9:30 AM the next day. The child never sleeps in his own bed or wake up to a mother or father. She lives in a 2 bedroom apartment and the father of her soon to be daughter is a Deputy Sheriff of Stafford County and his dad is a Judge in Stafford and a uncle is a lawyer for Stafford county Courts and I have to have my Custody battle in Stafford County courts.

    My question is what grounds can I file for custody? Can I change court systems since her boyfriend and his family knows and works the Stafford county courts. I wouldn't get a fair trial... Her leaving my son at NIGHT care for 18 hours is that a form of child abandonment?? How can a child have a bond with the mother or father with that much time at NIGHT care?? She only lets me see him on Sundays and that is it even though I give her from my job and disability $910.00 a month and she refuses to let me know where the night care is and won't let me see him any other time that I have asked for many, many of times.

    Is there anyone that can help me and my wife?? My wife and I together make over 75K a year and the mother only makes 12K a year. PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME I BEG YOU...
  • Jul 5, 2009, 10:58 AM
    cadillac59

    There's no reason you cannot have custody of the child, at a minimum during the times the mom is working (if you want these hours) in addition to other times.

    I wouldn't be too concerned about living in a good-ol-boy county where everyone is supposedly going to be in conspiracy against you over something as banal as who has custody of your kid at what hours. Don't anticipate problems that haven't happened yet and will likely never be problems.

    If you make the money you do, just talk to a good family law attorney in your county, hire him or her, and you'll do fine.
  • Jul 5, 2009, 12:14 PM
    cdad

    You need to file for custody. And when you do so long as it truly works for you ask for you to be the one that provides the nightcare. How close do you live to each other ? You need to assert your rights in court. Waiting on her to give them to you is only going to fail you in the long run.
    Lawyer up and make it legal through the courts.
  • Jul 5, 2009, 12:47 PM
    rookie231

    Since you have never established your paternity/custody rights she is considered to have sole custody, and can set all the rules. Any money "support" you have paid her up until now will be considered a gift, so you need to set that up through a court system.

    Do you live in Stafford County and where was the baby born? If you do not, and the baby was not, then she would have to have lived in Stafford county 6 months to establish residency, AND you could file in your current county.
    Otherwise, the case will happen in Stafford.
    If you file this as Child Abandonment (which a lawyer won't ) if you get one, it will be thrown out, not anywhere close to what Child Abandonment is.

    Highest salary does not automatically wi.n
  • Mar 26, 2012, 09:59 PM
    leyocraven
    You can file an ex parte for emotional stress on the child for being in a night care... if you are able to tend to the child while she works if not then she has no choice because she has to make a living also

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