I've been married for almost four years and already we are about to separate, my husband is kind a very hard person, it is very hard to demonstrate his feeling (if he has any)he does not appreciate me or what I do for him. I just don't think Ii can live with all his crap and on top off that We were about to cheat on me. So at first he did not want to separate but now we both agreed it's probably our next best option. Ok, that's the not main reason I'm writing this. I have a crush on my husband's best friend, they have been friends since like 5, and he is a great guy just unlucky in love. He lives in another state and came to visit us for the weekend, so we went out to a club on Friday night and we all got pretty drunk but he was so bad he had to be taken to my brother's car and then I started to loose it and my husband took me to the car WITH HIM!! And left us there. Of course I did the most stupid thing I have ever done... I kissed him I can't remember if he kissed me back but I do remember him opening his mouth so I could kiss him then I kissed his neck, his ears OMG I went crazy I think I even touched him, but it was like only 2 or 3 minutes, Could he have known it was me if he was that drunk? The next day he looked very happy and smiling a lot, everybody was making fun of us because we got really sick and he says we does not remember absolutely anything which is great! If it is true, could he really not remember I kissed him, or he is just saying that because of course he is not going to tell anyone? So now he is saying that he already made a decision and he is moving with his sister to be close to us, my husband has been insisting for months for him to do that, now what the hell am I going to do? Giving the fact that I'm separating, should I go for it? My husband knows I like him a lot but is not really jealous about it. I don't know if he feels the same but I've seen him and I've been told that he looks at me every now and then, what should I do you guys? I feel that if his moves here it's just going to get worse because it's not just a physical attraction it's a lot more than that he is a really good guy and he has all the qualities I like in a man qualities that my husband does not have. I know what I did was wrong but after that I feel like I digged a bigger hole because I feel more attracted to him

You really shouldn't do anything until you are divorced. I think in your situation if you are rather close to him as a friend confide in him that your marriage is on the rocks and you are separating because it hasn't been working out for the past xx month(s) or year(s). Then leave it go at that.

Hold up there young lady! You are married? You got married for what reasons?? Did you not see what sort of a person you were marrying? Now, you claim you have the hots for someone else? Too many mistakes here. If you and your husband cannot see yourselves going to a professional marriage counselor to help the situation you are now in, what makes you think that jumping from one bed to another will be any better?
If and this is a big IF you do decide on a divorce. Do not make yourself available to anyone for at least a year. You need that much time to get your emotions in order and to get your priorities straight before you even consider dating.

Why do I get the impression that marriage is no more important than deciding which lipstick to wear.

I find it personally really disgusting that you would have so little regard for your husband, his feelings, his future, not to mention your marriage. You have a crush on his best friend, who you decide to kiss and touch the minute your husband is out of range.

And you're wondering if you should 'go for it' with your husbands best friend?

You have already cheated. Kissing and touching in a sexual way is cheating, no matter how you cut the cheese.

I think if he had been sober, he would have either run away from your advances, or you would have encouraged him to do the deed, and you seem like the sort of person to me that wouldn't feel remorse if it bit you in the a**.

As far as I'm concerned your husband is far better off without you. In my opinion, people like you should have to qualify for a marriage licence.

You obviously have no clue what a commitment, or a marriage is all about.

With any luck, your husbands best friend is a person of marginal moral character, and despite what you did to him, he will tell your husband.

It's called a consequence.

That is the impression I am getting as well. It does not seem like you care too much about marriage at all. Why did you get married? For convenience? It sure seems that way. I do not know but since your not willing to work on your marriage. I would say you may as well get divorced. Even though it is too easy to get out of divorce now a days. It seems to me you do not really care about your marriage but more worried about your crush.

Time to say goodbye to your husband but I also agree that before you go ahead with any of your fantasies, you need to have the divorce officially settled. I would also like to state that you will probably end up in the same situation in another 4 years with this new guy. You hardly know him and all your attention is for him.

I doubt that the best friend will jump into a relationship with you. Not if he really is a good friend like you say he is.

Your husband should come first for him, not you, you're just the wife with the wandering eyes and lips. Besides, he'd be foolish to get into a relationship with you, it's just a matter of time before you find something better, then he'll be minus a best friend and sex.

Why did you get married? Did it just seem like a cool idea at the time? :rolleyes: