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-   -   Does he still have feelings for her? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=369161)

  • Jun 26, 2009, 01:02 AM
    scenegirl
    Does he still have feelings for her?
    Me and my boyfriend had just starting dating. But a concern I have is that he has had so many girlfriends before me, I'm afraid weŽll end very quick. He always tells me that this one ex always tells him that she misses being with him and it makes her sad seeing him with someone else. Which is me. He tells me it makes him sad. Do you think he still has feelings for this girl?
  • Jun 26, 2009, 01:13 AM
    GlassFlower

    It sounds to me like he's trying to make you jealous. He may have feelings for her, but the best thing to do is to talk with him about it. If you two can't communicate about this type of situation, than it doesn't sound like it could really go to far anyway.
  • Jun 26, 2009, 04:33 AM
    liz28

    What reasons behind him saying what he said isn't good. Some how I think your be better off without him and then he can run back to his ex since he feels so sad because he isn't with her. It's better to quit while your ahead.

    If you stay with this guy your going turn to an insecure person.
  • Jun 26, 2009, 06:11 AM
    kctiger

    How old are you? You sound VERY young...

    I don't see a mature guy saying something like that to a potential girlfriend unless they are young and dumb (pardon the expression). You see a caution flag being thrown up, so be advised this is your warning!
  • Jun 26, 2009, 06:54 AM
    jmw0713

    Sounds like this dude didn't take the time to heal and get rid of the emotional baggage from his last relationship.

    Red Flag indeed.
  • Jun 26, 2009, 06:59 AM
    Romefalls19

    Hello rebound, no offense. He isn't over his ex at all
  • Jun 26, 2009, 07:02 AM
    ZoeMarie

    I agree with everyone else, this would be enough for me to break it off and find someone that is ready for a relationship
  • Jun 26, 2009, 07:05 AM
    jolienoire

    Get rid of him before you get hurt. He is not ready, and you don't want to be a rebound.
  • Jun 26, 2009, 08:46 AM
    talaniman

    Take it for what it is, he has had a lot of girlfriends, and your his latest. That means don't get carried away by your feelings for him. Just have fun getting to know him, and keep the eyes open, and pay attention.

    Is he always talking about the ex? If he is, that's something to pay attention to, but if it was a one time conversation, let it go and don't make it a bigger deal than what it is.

    Did he leave these other relationships, or did they leave him?

    What's so unusual about a guy having feelings, and fond memories with their exes any way?
  • Jun 26, 2009, 08:48 AM
    kctiger
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by talaniman View Post

    Whats so unusual about a guy having feelings, and fond memories with their exes any way?

    KCTiger Rule: Do NOT talk to a female about your ex!
  • Jun 26, 2009, 08:51 AM
    Romefalls19

    I agree with KC's rule, unless it's brought up by the person. But ALWAYS avoid saying things she was good at.


    Learned the hard way when I was younger
  • Jun 26, 2009, 08:53 AM
    ZoeMarie
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    Whats so unusual about a guy having feelings, and fond memories with their exes any way?

    Nothing wrong with that. I just don't think most people would talk about those feelings with a current girlfriend, if those feeling are that he misses her, unless that's his subtle way of telling her he wants to get back with her. Just seems weird in my opinion.
  • Jun 26, 2009, 08:59 AM
    jmw0713

    Totally agree with KC's rule. It just causes unnecessary friction and insecurity between you and the person you are dating.


    Now if the relationship has been going on for a while, AND the subject comes up, then I wouldn't see the harm in talking about past relationships. It could give your current partner insights on where you are coming from when particular situations arise as well as a personal insight on special part your life.

    As long as it is all done in good taste and the conversation stays respectful to everyone invlolved... then why not. However, I would not be talking about my ex when I am still in the beginning phases of a relationship. That just shows that you are still carrying some baggage over from the last one.
  • Jun 26, 2009, 10:53 AM
    scenegirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by kctiger View Post
    How old are you? You sound VERY young...

    I don't see a mature guy saying something like that to a potential girlfriend unless they are young and dumb (pardon the expression). You see a caution flag being thrown up, so be advised this is your warning!

    I'm 15

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