[F]


Well I will be 21 on the 14 of this month and my b/f is 26 we have been together for 2 1/2 years I love him very much and I know he feels the same and I just want to know if I am too young to get married, or if the relationship is too young?

Age is relative. It is all a matter of experience and maturity.

Now, I will say that I believe the number 21 is rather young to be married. What is the rush? You have your whole life ahead of you.

Marriage is something everyone should give careful thought to. It's a very big step in one's life.

Try taking some personal time and sit down and write out a list. Have two columns, three if you're uncertain about some things. Have one section be why your for marriage, one for why you're not. As I said for the third as an extra option, write down here what you're not really sure on.

I would recommend not just doing this on your own but with your boyfriend too, so you can both consider everything together.

Sometimes it helps to put your thoughts down on paper.

I was married at 21 and my wife to be was 19; we've been happily married 8 years now. So, my biased answer is no, it is not too young. However, you do need to realize that both of you will change a lot over the years. Marriage is more than just love: trust, understanding, and compromise are equally important. I think Knowlegefinder has a very good idea. I think J_K is spot on that it is about maturity and not so much about the number.

It's hard to answer your question based on the limited information you've provided. How do you feel in your own heart of hearts? Do you truly feel that the two of you are compatible and could weather a successful marriage now? How about finances? Are you financially stable enough to afford a home and possibly children if any come along? 2 1/2 years should be enough time to get to know someone. Is he an upstanding, trustworthy man? If you can answer 'yes' to all of these questions then I'd say your chances are pretty good. Do some honest, heartfelt soul searching and you should be able to answer your question.

Question... do you want to marry him? Can you live without him? What is his favorite color? Does he love coffee or tea? What are the birth dates of his parents? Do you want a house or an apartment? Are you going to leave with who parents? Do you want a checking account? In both names? Are you carrying his last name? How much money do you have in the bank? Do you want children? Does he have children?

If you and your mate can answer some of these question without getting into a fight... then you are really for marriage... but keep asking questions... go to counseling... with a religious organization... or a professional... if you have to ask the question...

No your not too young. You may feel like others may think this but if you truly love someone and are ready to make that commitement then it is up to you.

No age is too young if two people have love, communication, maturity and COMMITMENT to each other.

My husband and I are marriage mentors at our church and we see couples of all ages and backgrounds become engaged and marry. The one thing we ask all our mentorees is this: "If you lost everything you owned and had nothing but the clothes on your back and each other would you still choose this person to marry?

That kind of brutal question is important because it strips away the romantic and the materialistic "priorities" of our culture and forces a couple to examine their true motives for getting married. The reality is people marry for all kinds of reasons from the desire to get out from under their parents roof to wanting to be "rescued" from a bad life.

Now, I know that doesn't sound romantic or encouraging, but its often a good indicator of how committed you are to each other. Because the true test of marriage doesn't come on the wedding day or the day you move in together. It comes when "things" don't matter. When there is a death, a job loss, an illness, a betrayal, a disappointment, or a test of loyalty.

And that's my two cents.