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-   -   What do I do when I don't like my perfect boyfriend? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=363644)

  • Jun 10, 2009, 09:03 PM
    katelyn102
    What do I do when I don't like my perfect boyfriend?
    I have been dating my boyfriend for about 3 months. He's perfect to me. All the girls want him and they think I'm lucky. To me he is so unnatractive, I have already cut off any sexual activity period. I don't want to break up with him and regret it.. I'm also going to Florida with him for a week with my family next week...
  • Jun 10, 2009, 09:08 PM
    Syzygy

    You should take a step back and reevaluate why you no longer like him. Right now you're being very unfair to him. Don't lead him on.
  • Jun 10, 2009, 09:09 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    Well first if he was perfect you would not care about looks ( they are not really important if you have a great connection)

    The first few months are when you find out, and to be honest is when you wait to have sex to find out if he is perfect, So you break up and don't take him to Florida if he is not right for you
  • Jun 10, 2009, 10:01 PM
    Gemini54
    I think that the answer is simple. How would you feel if you were him?

    If you don't like him and don't want to have sex with him then don't take him to Florida and don't string him along.

    Treat him with the respect that you would like to be treated with and in the future your thoughtfulness will be returned.
  • Jun 11, 2009, 04:30 AM
    liz28

    You should be ashame of yourself for leading him on.

    You knew what he look like 3 months ago and his looks didn't bother you. Now your witholding sex but you don't like him nor his looks.

    My advice is to leave him alone and find someone more attractive and stop holding on to him because you think your going regret it.

    You some off as really selfish and I wish your boyfriend could see what you wrote.

    Also, I wonder who is paid for this upcoming Florida trip.
  • Jun 11, 2009, 05:11 AM
    makapuu
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by katelyn102 View Post
    i have been dating my boyfriend for about 3 months. hes perfect to me. all the girls want him and they think im lucky. to me he is so unnatractive, i have already cut off any sexual activity period. i dont want to break up with him and regret it.. im also going to florida with him for a week with my family next week...

    You are dating a guy that you think is perfect, but you think he's unattractive. How does that make him perfect? You don't want to break up with him because you'd regret it if he finds his true love among any of the other girls that actually want him. Why are you dating him?
  • Jun 11, 2009, 05:11 AM
    makapuu
    How does he feel about you? Maybe he just wants to go to Florida.
  • Jun 11, 2009, 05:18 AM
    I wish

    How can he be perfect if you find him unattractive? You mean he has a perfect personality? I wish I knew how that worked.

    Don't worry about other girls wanting him. The question is do YOU want him? Is his looks that important to you that you're considering breaking up with him? Wow, how do you think this would make him feel if he knew how you really felt about him?

    You have the perfect personality, but you're too ugly and I can't look at you (or have sex with you), so I have to break up with you.

    If you really feel that way, then you should just break up with him and stop leading him on.
  • Jun 11, 2009, 06:00 AM
    Romefalls19

    What makes him perfect? That other girls want him or because you want him?
  • Jun 11, 2009, 06:19 AM
    jmooney527
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    Well first if he was perfect you would not care about looks ( they are not really important if you have a great connection)

    The first few months are when you find out, and to be honest is when you wait to have sex to find out if he is perfect, So you break up and don't take him to florida if he is not right for you

    I would have to disagree with this. Outward appearance are what draws people in at the beginning. Being physically attracted to someone is just one part of having a great connection. Don't get me wrong I value personality far above looks, but you need physical attraction also.

    I believe she's saying that he's perfect on paper... not for her in particular. He may be perfect TO you (nice, caring, attentive, etc) but not FOR you. You may need something else that creates that "spark" and makes things exciting. It's been 3 months and it sounds like you're basically bored with him already. If you cut off sexual activity it's pretty clear you're on your way out of the relationship. But don't string him along in the process. Just be clear that this isn't working out, and if you like hanging out with him maybe just try to be friends? You've already cut off sexual activity so you're not far from it ;)
  • Jun 11, 2009, 06:28 AM
    ZoeMarie

    It sounds like there's no chemistry. You can try all you want, but that's something you can't force. Set him free so one of these girls that wants him so bad can have him.
  • Jun 12, 2009, 10:30 AM
    talaniman

    I think you like him because every other girl wants him and you like the envy of having such a perfect, popular unattractive dude.

    You sound very young, how old are you?
  • Jun 12, 2009, 03:17 PM
    SNOOPY18

    WEll its only been 3 months into the relationship he mite seem perfect now but people change in relationship I think u should stay with him its only once in a lifetime that a girl find a perfect guy
  • Jun 12, 2009, 04:55 PM
    N0help4u

    I agree with the others if he was so perfect you wouldn't be feeling this way. Not only do you need to step back and evaluate how you feel about him you also need to figure out exactly what it is that makes you want to stay with him.
    When you can tell us what makes you want to stay with him then maybe we can help you better.

    Do you want to stay with him because all the other girls want him so it is like a status symbol that he is yours?

    Do you want to stay with him because you are afraid to hurt his feelings?

    Do you want to stay with him because you worry about what others will think if you break up with him?

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