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-   -   Is my boyfriend gay? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=363298)

  • Jun 9, 2009, 07:29 PM
    confusedax
    Is my boyfriend gay?
    I have been dating this guy for 10 months and our relationship has its ups and downs, but has been over all very intense. We have an amazing sex life (3-4 times a DAY), we have fun together, we talk about our future, having a family kids etc... This past weekend we were both very drunk at a club and it seemed to me like he was flirting with a guy, (this has happened once or twice before) and I asked him jokingly if he was into guys, and made him feel comfortable talking about it. He kept saying that he wasn't into them, and he could not imagine having sex with a guy, but he would not be opposed to having a guy touch his parts.

    I said I would even be open to having a 3some so he could experiment and we kind of joked about who in the club would be his "type". The next morning, he didn't really want to talk about it, and now I don't know if he is gay, bi, or what... What should I do?
  • Jun 9, 2009, 07:37 PM
    scott_1976

    Your man is bi-sexual
  • Jun 9, 2009, 07:47 PM
    TheOreeoShow

    Seems to me like he is bi... sorry but WAIT!! You need to ask him when he's sober before the final judgement :(
  • Jun 9, 2009, 07:48 PM
    Alty

    Only he knows, we can only guess.

    Talk to him about it.
  • Jun 9, 2009, 07:51 PM
    scott_1976
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by TheOreeoShow View Post
    Seems to me like he is bi ... sorry but WAIT!!! you need to ask him when he's sober before the final judgement :(

    Nah... alchohol is truth serum... it unlocks inhabitions and he said he wouldn't mind having a guy touch his stuff, that is Bi and there is nothing wrong with that!
  • Jun 9, 2009, 08:06 PM
    Triysle
    Sorry, I can't answer that question. You got to ask him, because he is the only one who can answer it.

    No offense to anyone here, but just because he said something while drunk in a bar that doesn't mean he actually wants it to happen. Plenty of people fantasize, and plenty of people even talk about it. He may have even be joking.

    Ask him. There's really no way for you to know unless you get a straight answer from him, or see it with your own eyes.

    ~ Tee
  • Jun 9, 2009, 08:08 PM
    scott_1976

    If he is attracted to her and to guys what's the big deal?
  • Jun 9, 2009, 08:11 PM
    makapuu

    He sounds like he could be bi, or wanting to turn bi. I knew a guy that was bi in college and years later supposedly only had girlfriends. I suspected that he still had bi urges because he was always sooooo upset when he wasn't invited when his male "friends" went camping or on road trips. His girlfriend also said they had an amazing sex life, but it sounded more like "quickies" than lovemaking.
  • Jun 10, 2009, 09:14 AM
    neverme

    Talk to him, no one can answer this for you.

    BUT.. considering you got so far as to start picking out types for him I think he may be on the road to bi's-ville.

    As long as you can deal with this fact there should be no problem. Contrary to popular belief bisexuals CAN BE MONOGAMOUS!!

    And I'll leave you on the note of saying, don't do what your not comfortable with as far as letting him explore his sexuality. Whether your there or not, the image whether conjured or real will stay with you forever. Just make sure you can deal with that.

    Best of Luck with it.
  • Jun 10, 2009, 09:23 AM
    lighterrr

    Maybe he is just bi-curious
  • Jun 10, 2009, 09:26 AM
    Romefalls19

    This is a touchy subject.

    First off, whoever said alcohol is a truth serum, not true.

    Second, he was drunk and you said you both were joking around. So who knows(only him)

    Third, talk to him sober and get his thoughts about it. Tell him you have an open mind and would like to discuss it
  • Jun 10, 2009, 09:29 AM
    scott_1976

    What is the big deal anyway is she going to leave him if he is Bi??
  • Jun 10, 2009, 03:58 PM
    fahhuhhteaa

    Keep talking & keep asking questions!
  • Jun 10, 2009, 05:48 PM
    liz28

    I think drunk people say and/or do things they can't do or say while their sober. For some people it's a truth serum. You don't need a lie detector test just give them some alcohol.

    I never, I mean never, had a guy talk me he wouldn't mind if another guy touch their privates. Most guys would knock a guy out if another guy tried to go near that area.

    I think your boyfriend might be bi-curious but is afraid to admit it that why he doesn't want to talk about it nor face it.

    So is your boyfriend gay-no. But he is a little curious-yes.

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