I am in love with this girl,we know each other from school days, Almost for about 10 years now. We both fell in love about 3 years back,And were just very happy. About an year back, we started to fight, As she found I was controlling and get angry very easily. I know that and I am working on that, Due to these mis-understandings we started to spend less n less time together, There were numerous attempts that I have made to reconcile and she seems not interested. Off lately she started spending more time with her friends a lot and started lying to me. And today, she confessed that she likes someone from her group of friends.I know this guy and had warned her about him long back, she didn't listen and gives more importance to him, more than she ever gave me and she now says that she doesn't deserve me and wants to breakup. Now, I really love this girl very much and am hurt very badly and I clearly don't know what to do. Should I give more attention to her n try some more times to get her back. Or let her go...

Please gimme an idea, I am completely broken and lost

What is there to warn about this other guy? She's not stupid. If she's interested in the guy too, she will go near him. If she really liked you, nor matter what the other guy feels, it won't affect her feelings for you.

The fact that you felt the need to warn her means that you lost trust in her.

She already told you to move on. Even if you don't listen to her, she's going to move on herself.

I know you still care about her deeply, but if she doesn't feel the same way, you can't do anything about it. You can't force her to do anything she doesn't want.

It's time to move on...

You better go into no contact or else you're just going to prolong the pain and suffering.

Stick to the rules: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...qs-332732.html

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Originally Posted by confusedinpain

Now, I really love this girl very much and am hurt very badly and I clearly don't know what to do. Should I give more attention to her n try some more times to get her back. Or let her go...

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Well, giving more attention to someone who's told you they are moving on... that's not love, that's mania. The stuff stalker's are made of.

LOVE means a healthy desire for the OBJECT of your love to be happy. That's first and foremost. So, if the OBJECT of your love is telling you to go away and you don't go away, then you are demonstrating LACK of love for them. Understand?

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Please gimme an idea, I am completely broken and lost

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The melodrama is understandable, but it's up to you to reign it in. It will only cause you to do/say dumb things regarding her and do dangerous things regarding yourself.

Feel the pain, that's fine, just don't wallow in it, don't feed it, don't put feet on it and don't let it TAKE you anywhere. Feel it, pat it on the head (you rascally "feelings", you... ), put it away, get back to real life.

Wish your ex-girlfriend well, mean it, and head for your next big-adventure before it starts without you.

Now I did try leaving her alone, But today was her final semester exams, And I couldn't stop myself from wishing all the best, And she replied saying just a thanks and a bye. I understand she is trying to avoid me, But later in the day she messages me saying her exams were great, and she was going to a friend's birthday party... I had no thoughts of her all through the day, But since the moment I saw her message,All I can think about is her!!

Its Been 6 days since I started NC, initially it was very tough, it still is.. Every time My phone rings, I hope its her!! But I am strong.. Thanks a Lot everyone for their suggestions.. they have helped me a lot.

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Originally Posted by confusedinpain

Its Been 6 days since I started NC, initially it was very tough, it still is.. Every time My phone rings, I hope its her!!! But I am strong.. Thanks a Lot everyone for their suggestions.. they have helped me a lot.

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No prob man. It might get tougher for a few days, but eventually it will get easier. I'm on my 2nd month of NC and I'm pretty sure I need to continue it, but it's a lot easier than when I first started.

By the end of this, we're much stronger and in a better position to start a new relationship.

Hey "I wish" thanks for the support bro..
Today she came home to meet me, and says that she is very confused and wanted 2 days to come to a final decision. I couldn't respond to her at all... So should I wait for her or just refuse?

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About an year back, we started to fight, As she found I was controlling and get angry very easily. I know that and I am working on that, Due to these mis-understandings we started to spend less n less time together, There were numerous attempts that I have made to reconcile and she seems not interested. Off lately she started spending more time with her friends a lot and started lying to me. And today, she confessed that she likes someone from her group of friends.I know this guy and had warned her about him long back, she didn't listen and gives more importance to him, more than she ever gave me and she now says that she doesn't deserve me and wants to breakup.

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You have been waiting for a year for her to make a decision to take you back and give you another chance, whats 2 more days??

The bad part, as I see it, you have been avoiding making your own decision for a long time, despite everything she has said, and done, to put you in the friends zone, while she pursues her options, and opportunities.

I would have been gone when she first dumped me, and had another interest, but that's just me.

Right, tell her you kind of feel the same but we can either work on this and it will pay off when we are fine again, or we can forget each other, trust me on this I used to have a similar problem with my girlfriend when she was confused and had doubts about us, and trust me she will choose the 1st one

I gave her the time she needed... All she said was that she didn't deserve a guy like me. And told me to remove her from my life. I am going back to NC, deleted all her pics,messages,gave back everything that she had given me. NC here I go...