Does anyone know what I can do to help relax? I am constantly worrying about things that I shouldn't even worry about. I just got married, everything is wonderful, but I worry about someday getting divorced. I sit there and try and plan what I would do if that would happen. I also worry about stuff like my mom is getting older, (she is 45), and she might not have much longer to live. She is not sick by the way. I worry about EVERYTHING! Money, work, school, family, friends... Nothing is really going on that I should be worrying. What is my problem? :confused:

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Originally Posted by Miranda

my mom is getting older, (she is 45), and she might not have much longer to live. She is not sick by the way.

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OMG!! Please, I am 42, I hope no one worries about me that way, and I have had cancer!! I am not getting older, only younger!! Age is a number!!

It sounds as though you could have something similar to GAD, Generalized Anxiety Disorder.

There are medications that can help combat your worries and make life much easier. Contact your doctor. You may need to seek the help of a therapist.

I used to worry, before the cancer, and my motto was

"Give me your worries so you don't have to worry, only $10 an hour." I would have been a millionaire!!

But the right meds got me through that.

Meditation, yoga, among others can help too.

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Originally Posted by Miranda

Does anyone know what I can do to help relax? I am constantly worrying about things that I shouldn't even worry about. I just got married, everything is wonderful, but I worry about someday getting divorced. I sit there and try and plan what I would do if that would happen. I also worry about stuff like my mom is getting older, (she is 45), and she might not have much longer to live. She is not sick by the way. I worry about EVERYTHING! Money, work, school, family, friends..... Nothing is really going on that I should be worrying. What is my problem? :confused:

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Hi there, I'm exactly the same I worry and stress over everything

There are several ways to manage your worries. J_9 mentioned some really good ones.
Another thing to consider (which goes along with meditation and yoga) is inner self help. This is not a quick fix like medications, it is a process of finding inner peace within yourself and changing negative thought patterns into positive ones.
A combination of medications and therapy, whether it be by a professional or by yourself, will help you feel better fast. Below is a link that will take you to an inner peace website. There you will find the same material used by inner peace therapists. The only difference is, you will be teaching yourself how to find, analyze and separate your feeling on your own instead of having a therapist do it for you. Some people find this too difficult and need a professional at first, then move on to the self help program as a means to cope with everyday struggles. You can use the system online or download the entire program or parts of the program you feel would be helpful to you. It's 100% free with no strings attached. http://innerpeace.org/main.shtml
Keep us posted.

Sometimes people that worry about all sorts of unimportant things tend to overproduce adrenaline. Thus we may be dealing with a biological problem and not so much a “mental” problem.

Many people who are hypoglycemic and don’t know this have this kind of problem. You can test yourself with the Nutrition Behavior Inventory Test (NBI) .

If you score high it may mean you are hypoglycemic.

You have many good suggestions here. I would add there, as yet, hasn't been much proof that biology regulates thoughts all that much apart from a few brain disorders. Have you tried running this past your MD? And this may be only a habit and habits are easier broken if they are derailed. Every time you catch yourself worrying, ask yourself "How's My Now?" and if its okay, give yourself permission not to worry for another hour or so. Then a day, then a month, etc. If necessary make a list of topics to think about that doesn't involve worrying: all the things you like about your family, all the happy moments in your past, all your favorite colors in order, etc. to use following those "How's My Now" interruptions.

Its all a matter of mental training.

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Originally Posted by valinors_sorrow

There as yet, hasn't been much proof that biology regulates thoughts all that much apart from a few brain disorders. And this may be only a habit and habits are easier broken if they are derailed. Every time you catch yourself worrying, ask yourself "How's My Now?" and if its okay, give yourself permission not to worry for another hour or so.

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For you to say that there is not much proof is saying that you have not seen the evidence. That does not mean the evidence is not there. All you can say is "I have not seen any evidence.......".

If you study science you will see the evidence.

I would be nice to see you refer people to a doctor before suggesting that they start YOUR diet.

Apparently you do not know the hazards of self-medicating. Diets are considered self-medication. How about the interactions of certain foods with medications. You do not even ask if people are on any medications or supplements.

Worrying about something will never change a thing. When you have a negative thought, replace it with a positive thought. It will get easier each time you do it and one day it will become a habit just as your worry thoughts are now. Yoga meditation and having Reiki are wonderful tools for relaxation. Was your mother a worrier as you are?

Extreme worry can be the sign for many things, Please seek professional help

Ever try meditation?

Meditation is very natural and helpful. It does take practise and commitement if you want to do this naturally. Meditation teaches both you and your innerself to relax, to release your daily thoughts, to except them and let them go and then to clear your mind. Saying a mantra. A favorite word to yourself and repeating it, works. Sitting is better then laying down. Sit while meditating in a dark room because darkness there is less distraction. Meditation is natural and with practise you will notice day by day getting better and better and eventually your mind will be so clear you will be wondering why you waisted so much of your life worrying. You could start 5 or 10 minutes in the morning and in the evening. Then after a week, if doing well increase the length of time. Even in your waking time spend that time on the favorite word. You are retraining your mind body and spirit to relax and clear out the clutter and by doing this you will find your days be healthier and happier. I used to meditate 2 hours a day. It is an amazing experience when you get practised. There are different forms of meditations as well. Like counting breaths or imagine beautiful scenery but what worked best for me was a mantra. I found so many things were lifted off my shoulder. I admit I have been out of practise and now with a new baby, wife and financial concerns I have found myself worrying again. The advice that I give to others I need to take as well. The effects of not meditating and having so much on my plate is making me go back to my old worrying ways but the cure I know is to take time for myself and start meditating again. It does make a world of difference. Meditation has been a cure for many things. Sleep problems, stress, asthma, depression, people who have been relying on drugs. Meditation is a natural high which causes the body, mind and spirit to all become one again and realigned and everything else becomes much more peaceful. I hope you do attempt this natural remedy. I do believe diet can have a factor as well. Eating healthy does make a difference in both your mind and body.

There are extreme cases or even doctors tend to prescribe medication for people to help sleep or having problems with stress. What might be prescribed and it was actually prescribed for me because I have sleeping problems for years. I was giving valium. The only thing with this and other medications is that they could become highly addictive. Which is just replacing one problem with another problem instead of getting to the root of the stress or dealing with certain ailments, worries, stress naturally. I do believe strongly the best natural cure is meditation.

I know this is way too long and I hope that you have patience to read through everything but I also would like to mention. When you focus on the negative and think negatively and constantly worry about things that might happen. Many people will direct that negative thoughts and even bring on more negative experiances to themselves. People who focus more on positive. Think more positively and intern more possitive experiances will come to that person.



Joe

Wow, I'm sorry! I didn't even see that people had commented on my post until now. Sorry about that, and thank you all for taking the time to read my post. I think the majoruty of my problem is stress. I work full time and go to school full time. I also am a newlywed. I have to keep the house clean, grocery shop, pay bills, laundry, etc... We are also having money issues. We have about 24k in debt, and that does not count my 50k in student loans I haven't started paying on yet. That is another worry I have. I know as soon as I graduate I will have to pay on them, and the manthly payment will be outrageous. I just have a lot of stress for someone of my age. Not to mention, my mother and grandmother are very negative people, and that is how I have become. Every time I speak to them they are discussing something negative. If they don't talk about something negative, they don't have anything to say! I am just trying to take things day by day, and be very aware of my negativity. When I catch myself worrying I have to stop myself and try to think of something else. I would love to be able to meditate or do yoga, but I do not have time for anything! Thank you all again for your input!

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Originally Posted by J_9

I would be nice to see you refer people to a doctor before suggesting that they start YOUR diet.

Apparently you do not know the hazards of self-medicating. Diets are considered self-medication. How about the interactions of certain foods with medications. You do not even ask if people are on any medications or supplements.

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I fully agree, you should always seek the advice of your doctor. They are trained to understand prediabetic hypoglycemia. They may not know how to test for it though.

Please, do not try to compare food with medication or self-medication. Most foods are not xenobiotic like drugs. Most drugs are "foreign" to the body.

Changing a diet radically does indeed compare with self-medication. That is why it is advised that when a client changes their diet to something this radical they are to consult their doctor.

They may not necessarily do this with the prisoners you have worked with, but in mainstream society severe diet changes without consultation of the doctor = self-medication.

Also, please understand that every person with an underlying mental or emotional disturbance is not suffering from prediabetic hypoglycemia.

You do have a lot going. Stop for a moment and think if you can organize your day and give yourself 20 minutes to be still and do some yoga. Meditation is probably not going to work right now for you, your mind would be going a million miles. You can incorportate meditation with the yoga. The yoga moves help your body to relax. As I said earlier, retrain yourself by thinking a positive thought when a negative one pops in your mind. If your mom and grandmother are negative, you have those old tapes in your mind which will pop up automatically. You can change that and then your children will have a chance. When you worry about students loans, replace it with, I will be able to get a better job after college. They will work with you, they do not expect it back in a day. Everything is fixable, you are not even out of school yet. Goodness, what is your worrying going to do to change things? A friend said if she did not worry, she felt as if she did not care about those things. She wrote a plan of action down and goals, and put it aside and tried to let it go. Eventually it worked. She would replace one good thought for each negative and soon that is how she responded.

A lot of people worry about a variety of things; I know that I do. It goes in waves for me - sometimes I'll worry tons and other times I'm all right.

I think what you may be doing, and I do it as well, is that you're so happy with the life that you have at the moment that you don't want it to ever change or go away. You worry that something will happen to disrupt that happiness and run different scenarios in your head about how and why and when. I think that's partly society's fault. We are taught (however subtly) that joy cannot last forever and that bad things happen all the time. You may have experienced such a thing before, as most people have. This is a different situation, though, and a different set of circumstances. There is no point in worrying about things that you cannot change. You cannot stop time, so just live in the moment and be happy with the things that you do have and the joy that you feel now.

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Originally Posted by scotchtape

A lot of people worry about a variety of things; I know that I do. It goes in waves for me - sometimes I'll worry tons and other times I'm alright.

I think what you may be doing, and I do it as well, is that you're so happy with the life that you have at the moment that you don't want it to ever change or go away. You worry that something will happen to disrupt that happiness and run different scenarios in your head about how and why and when. I think that's partly society's fault. We are taught (however subtly) that joy cannot last forever and that bad things happen all the time. You may have experienced such a thing before, as most people have. This is a different situation, though, and a different set of circumstances. There is no point in worrying about things that you cannot change. You cannot stop time, so just live in the moment and be happy with the things that you do have and the joy that you feel now.

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You pretty much hit the nail on the head! I am very happy with my life (except the money situation). I do worry that something will change my life for the worse. I sometimes go through scenarios in my head and try to plan what I would do if something happened (such as a divorce or something like that) I am trying to just be conscious about what I am thinking so that I don't do it. Most of the time I am not even aware that I am thinking negatively. I have heard that yoga may be a good thing for me. I wouldn't have time to go to a class, but maybe I could buy a dvd and do it at home or something. Thanks everyone for all of your suggestions!

I read a book once, I will try and find the name of it. It was great about worry, you spend so much time and energy on scenarios about what will happen and how you will handle it. The chances of it happening are like NOT. Also, if for instance you go over and over in your head what you will say in a meeting and what they will say etc. The chances of it going like that are 1 to 1000000. All the worry was for naught. A big waste of energy that could go to doing yoga.

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Originally Posted by J_9

Changing a diet radically does indeed compare with self-medication. That is why it is advised that when a client changes their diet to something this radical they are to consult their doctor.

They may not necessarily do this with the prisoners you have worked with, but in mainstream society severe diet changes without consultation of the doctor = self-medication.

Also, please understand that every person with an underlying mental or emotional disturbance is not suffering from prediabetic hypoglycemia.

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I fully agree that you should never radically change your diet unless absolutely necessary. This would usually be under doctor's supervision.

The best way to approach nutritional therapy is first have medical tests done for possible medical conditions that may be responsible for your mental symptoms.

Then start with your diet as is at present; what you enjoy and do not enjoy and gradually introduce the necessary changes. Suddenly withdrawing from sugar may be a problem and treating sugar addiction is sometime hard. I suggest you use Glycerine as a temporary measure to overcome sugar addiction or even any other addiction. It also helps in sleeping. Ask your doctor, although glycerine is freely available.

The relationship between hypoglycemia and depression is well documented.

See:

Conquering Anxiety, Depression and Fatigue Without Drugs - The Role of Hypoglycemia byProfessor J H Levitt

If people do not have hypoglycemia it may be another form of metabolic abnormality at work. This can be tested medically in most cases by Nutritional Doctors. But hypoglycemia happens to be a very common factor in depression. anxiety attacks, PTSD, OCD, addictions etc etc.

See:

Samra, George(2004), THE HYPOGLYCEMIC CONNECTION II, One Step Allergies, Sydney.
Also read:

Werbach,M.R.(1991), NUTRITIONAL INFLUENCES ON MENTAL ILLNESS, A Sourcebook of Clinical Research, Third Line Pres, Inc.Tarzana. Cal.

Most forms of mental illness is due to some metabolic disorder, of which hypoglycemia is only one, although from experience a very common factor.

Other kinds of dysfunctional metabolism may be due to digestive illnesses, of which there are many. These usually interfere with nutrient absorption that is necessary in the production of neurotransmitters.

Following biological/nutritional treatment it is usually followed by a course of psychotherapy, to repair the damage done to personality as a result of suffering form many years of a metabolic disorder. Drug therapy appears to be palliative and generally does not address the underlying metabolic disorder. Nor can psychotherapy cure what is after all a metabolic disorder. This may explain the poor results in treatments, as acknowledged by psychiatrists themselves. See: Insel TR (2006)

I hope that in the 21 century therapists will be trained in Nutritional Biochemistry as an adjunct to other training in the mental health industry.