My question has to do with what is the healthiest way to behave. I've struggled with this kind of situation before in other areas of my life. I'm the kind of person that will speak my mind whether I like you or not. It can seem a bit rough around the edges to some. I've always enjoyed being a frank and honest person in this way. However, lately I'm wondering if I should be more gracious with people. At times I can be, but it feels phony. I guess what I'm asking is... After all this time, do I act gracious and be friendly or do I give a cold shoulder and act indifferent? I feel as though I could go either way. I just don't know...

This isn't a meeting either of us has set up. We will both be in the same situation.

Without knowing the history of your relationship with your ex, its hard to answer. But I find in tricky situations that I have been in, it is better to be the bigger person.

You don't have to spend an hour chatting to him, but a pleasant "hello, hows things, im great thank u for asking, well you take care, bye" and then moving on to talk to someone else has worked wonders for me. On the inside I wanted to say and do a lot more, but I kept it together and afterwards felt very proud of how I handled it.

Does that help any? :)

I don't know the circumstances either - but I can assure you that generally speaking, in life it is always better to be gracious.

There is always a time and a place to speak one's mind, and clearly in certain circumstances this is necessary and just.

However, in relation to an ex, it is enormously healthy to let go of past bad feelings and resentments and being gracious and friendly enables us to begin doing that.

A gracious person thinks of and considers others before themselves and tries to make them comfortable. Sometimes this means holding your tongue. Hopefully, you will be able to be polite and pleasant with your ex. If you are, I am sure that you will find it will be returned in kind.

Depends on the situation, it would help to know this?
How do you know he will be there?

If there are other people around then you don't even have to talk to each other if you don't want to, or you could just be polite and say 'hello' then go talk to other people.

I know your situation well, my advice would be polite yet short. Don't linger in conversation, just ask "hey, how are you" and "i'm running late, got to go. Take care"