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-   -   Did I scare her away (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=358086)

  • May 26, 2009, 11:55 AM
    shattalon
    Did I scare her away
    I ask this woman out on Monday. We had talked and walked with each other earlier and I enjoyed her company. I ask her to dinner at the end of our walk on Monday she agreed and told me she was coming off a relationship and it would be friends. I agreed by saying yes when I go out with someone new I just like to enjoy the evening. I called her the next day and ask her to walk again. She said she would call me and let me know. She did but declined to walk and said we would talk later in the week about Friday. She was very upbeat. I called her on Thursday about Friday but ran into her bfore she could call me back. She said she would meet me at the restaurant at 7. I sensed she was uneasy. Friday afternoon she cancelled. Saying she is dealing with a number of issues and wasn't ready (2 years sober). I understood completely. I am afraid I gave her the wrong imp[ression of my intentions coming across as if I want a relationshop ( I don't, I want friends now. I have some things of my own I need to lay to rest) I hope I get the opportuinity to go out with her.
    The questions(s) are did I scare her away and how do I get another opportunity to go out with her. I will run into her in our neighborhood either walking or at the pool.
  • May 26, 2009, 12:01 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    Perhaps she views all "dates" as more than friends, and you may have fun if you run into her. Talking and being honest with her is all you can do
  • May 26, 2009, 12:58 PM
    Romefalls19

    All you can do is wait for her to call you, stop trying to make contact and see what happens.

    Make new friends too, they are great to have
  • May 26, 2009, 01:06 PM
    shattalon
    I am not trying to make contact. I won't call her. I will run into her in the neighborhood because our neighborhood is so small it is inevitable.
  • May 26, 2009, 01:15 PM
    nikosmom

    When you do run in to her, just be upfront. Ask her if she thought you were coming on too strong. She may appreciate your kindness. For some reason when someone of the opposite sex asks to spend time together, it's hard for it to not be mistaken as a come-on.

    Just let her know that you're seeking friendship now.
  • May 26, 2009, 01:27 PM
    talaniman

    Don't push, and don't assume. Don't put all your eggs in her basket.

    Give her time and space for a bit, she obviously needs it.

    Me, I get another date with someone else, and check her out later.

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