I have full custody of my 10 month old son. His father has visitation every other weekend and takes my son to his home. He has told me that he lives alone, but I have come to find out that he moved in w/his new girlfriend. I have no problem w/who he lives in, but he refuses to introduce me to her or to allow me in his home. He continues to lie about living with her and, as he has always been a liar, I am not able to believe anything he says. I tried to contact his new girlfriend to ask that she give me a call sometime or come w/him when he gets our child so I can at least have a smiling face or friendly voice to put with her name. She e-mailed me back stating that she values her privacy and doesn't want to be involved in anyway or meet me at this time. Do I have any legal rights to demand to meet the woman or see his home? Or, am I able to suspend or limit his visitation otherwise? I know I can't make him be an honest person, but the fact that he is lying worries me. Thanks.

Stacey123...

I have been in your same situation, and no you have no rights regarding his personal life. I was told that who he dates is none of my business. You cannot control his life.

As far as where he lives, he is suppose to give you his address and phone number so that you can contact him when he has your child. But remember, you cannot make him answer the phone or call you back. I have been told that as long as your child comes back with no harm, there is nothing you can do.

I hate to sound negative here, but it does suck, for you and eventually your child. I had to start sending my son to his fathers when he was 3 months old, he is now 9. I am still fighting my husband through the court system.

You will have to eventually just deal with this and not ask questions about his personal life. All you can do is document, document, document. TRUST ME. If you try and call, write the date and time down. Mark on the calendar the weekends your child goes, everything!! Keep all of your documentation. I had to for 9 years because you never know when it will be needed.

My ex is a hibiutal liar also, he lies to cover a lie. All you can do is document and catch them in a lie. Because it will happen, TRUST ME. Nine years later, I finally won against my ex in court... it was a small victory, but a nice one. All the documentation prevailed!

I feel for you... but be strong and play by the rules. Be true... the first time you start to lower to his standards... he wins. Play by the book, as far a visitation, contact with the child, EVERYTHING. If it is his visitation, make sure he gets the child, if he doesn't exercise his visitation, document it. Make sure that if you have to go back to court for anything in the future, that you are going with a clean slate and not lying about anything, he will get caught eventually.


I am a FIRM believer that "what goes around comes around" and it may take a while (years) but it happens.

My story, for what it's worth! Hope it helps! ;)

Good luck.

Hi Stacy!

Your question: Do I have any legal rights to demand to meet the woman or see his home? Or, am I able to suspend or limit his visitation otherwise?

NO and NO!

I know you are curious to meet this person he is seeing especially because there is a "mother figure" at your ex's house and you would like to meet her. Rightfully so! I did! Even though I don't like this "mother figure" of my ex's... she has in no way harmed my daughter!

You can't force her to meet you! One day she may feel differently and want to meet you!

The answer to both of your questions is no. He may be a liar but in the court's eyes, that in and of itself does not merit limiting or taking away his visitation.