Okay, so I'm 21 and my girlfriend is 19. We have been dating for almost 8 months and school recently let out for the summer. We live 1000 miles away from each other, so these next 2 and a half months will be long distance.

Here's my plight:

She is "friends" with one of her coworkers who is 24. I don't like this guy for many reasons, but we will get into that in a second. Tonight my girlfriend was going out to the club with him and his friends. Here are the reasons I don't like this guy.

1. she has hooked up with him, they had a small fling.
2. she has drunkdialed him before right in front of me.
3. she frequently brings him up in conversation just to make me upset
4. over xmas break, this guy invite her to a midnight movie and professed that he still likes her ans shouldn't have ever let her go. She turns down the movie and tells me all about this, so I know she's not hiding anything more
5. since she got home 2 weeks ago, he has texted her everyday wanting to do something.

I have repeatedly told my girlfriend that I am uncomfortable with this guy very calm and collected. She has plenty of guy friends in her group of friends, including her ex boyfriend, which I have no problem with. Its just this one guy. I have told her this guy makes me uneasy.

The problem is, she doesn't seem to care that it upsets me. If it were me in her situation, and she felt uncomfortable about me hanging out with a girl who has done the same things this guy has done, I would not hang out with her because I know it makes her uncomfortable.

So tonight I had enough. I confronted her about how I didn't like that she wasn't respecting me enough to stay away from this guy. This is the only guy I have not wanted her to hang out with, I don't do this to every guy she knows, not even her ex. She was alrdy out with him, so she said she would call me later. I am currently awaiting a call from her once she gets back from the club.

She maintains that they are just friends, and she doenst seem him that way. I do believe her and she hasn't done anything to question my trust in her. If this were just another guy, I wouldn't care if she went out with them. But because of the things I listed before, this guy makes me cringe at the very thought of them being together in an ALCOHOLIC environment

Am I in the wrong here?
Should I have handled it differently?
We have had our problems, but have worked through them together and we are perfectly fine, except on the subject of this guy.
How should I deal with this from here on out?

Any insight would be great..

Thanks
Ryan

Basically what I said tonight when I confronted her ab it is I was upset that she didn't respect me enough to not hang out with the one guy she knew I didn't like. I kind of gave her a option: either be in a relationship with me and let this be the last night you go out just you and him, or you don't be in a relationship with me and hope that being able hang out with this guy for 2 motnhs was worth ending a great relationship. What do you think she will do?

It doesn't matter what she does. What matters is if you have the balls to stand up for yourself, and not put up with any more bad behavior.

So do you think, I was right by saying something, or do you think its sounding overprotective? I want her to know its not right and I'm tired of it, but I still love her and I don't want things to end because of this

Then do as she says, and keep taking her crap!

Look guy your not going to get it both ways, its either let her do as she pleases, or leave her alone. Do you honestly expect her to tell you the truth now, knowing your PO'ed? Do you expect her to do as you say all of a sudden??

I don't, and nor should you!

Chat/text speak.

Okay let me make sure I got this right. She had a fling with him, she calls him just to get her nerve, he admitted he likes her, he texts/calls everyday, she going around him where there is going be liquor and she already shown she can't handle her liquor?

I see where your worries come from. It seems like she likes the attention she is getting from this guy. Sooner or later your going hear her telling you "she is leaving you for him".

You can trust her and she isn't capable of making the right choices while she is drunk so the question is how much longer are you going put up with this? No matter what you can't change something that is going happen.

I feel for you - my ex insisted there was nothing wrong with hanging out with a guy friend who in no unclear terms was attracted to her, despite my protests that I was not comfortable with it. Then she left me for him after knowing only knowing his name for three weeks.

Sorry, but it sounds like something is up between the two of them. And you don't have any reason to expect her to tell you the truth about being with him after you give her an ultimatum. Good for you for standing up to her though.

Yeah, she's going to hook up with him for the next two months. Then when school starts you'll be able to nail her again if you wish. I'd probably just end it now so you can be over her by the time school starts.