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Ok so I was with my boyfriend yesturday from like 8:30am-3pm... He was "sick" and I was being a good girlfriend and staying with him. I then left him and he texted me saying hey I'm going back to sleep but I still want to go out with you and your family tonight so call me around 7... That was the last I heard from him and I don't know what to do now.. please help
He's probably just sick and sleeping, or maybe his phone died and he didn't realize. I wouldn't freak out about it. He'll call.
Maybe you should go to his place and check on him,if you can't reach him by phone.
Call one of his friends or family and see if they have heard from him.
I remember being so sick once that I couldn't even get to my phone. You were taking care of him a day ago, why don't you go back to check on him?
I don't want to be that crazy girlfriend that just shows up at his house yah know its still a fairly new relationship and I guess that's why I'm worried.. this is the longest time we've gone with out talking.
It's more like... the considerate girlfriend who cares about her boyfriend's health.Quote:
Originally Posted by bc472556
I'm sure you would want him to do the same for you if you were really sick.
Your concerned,your not going over there to check up on him for any negative reason.Quote:
Originally Posted by bc472556
If it is all that will calm you down,do it.
Bring him some treat that will help him feel better.
If he is not vomiting or coughing ,bring him some ice cream.
There is always chicken soup.
I don't see that you are over reacting.I think he will see it for what it is ,reasonable concern.
We'l he finally called me last night while I was at work.. turns out not only does he have broncittis he also broke his cell phone. I'm just very confused. I believe him and all but I have my guard up, do you think these are just excuses to ditch me?
Threads merged
The other day I wrote a post nervous about my sick boyfriend well today we had that serious talk and it turns out he wasn't sick.. he is going through withdrawl, he has been selling and dealing heroine and quit. He said he saw it taking over his life and he doesn't need drugs and he stopped cause he was in love with me. This is the first timehe has ever used the l word.. I just don't know what to do? PLease help fast!!
How old are the two of you? How long have you been together? Has he ever done anything ELSE to show that you can't trust him? HOW is he proposing to quit? Is he going to rehab? Herion is very very difficult (virtually impossible) to quit without help.
To be blunt:
This is not the type of relationship that you want to be involved in. It's not healthy and it's not fair to you.
I know you care about him, so if you want to help him, help him from a distance. Help him as a friend. Suggest that he finds professional help, such as rehab.
He needs to clean up his life before you can be involved in a relationship with him.
Ok, seems he wants to change, kicking drugs on your own is hard, how old is he, is he going to some support groups, perhaps rehab, or at least to his doctor for some assistance.
The problem here is, I guess he was using and selling drugs and you did not know ( of it you knew that is another issue) So if he does not stop how will you know.
Next is he selling for someone, it is not always easy to stop selling drugs
Now there are more questions to address
He disobey the first rule that drug dealers go by--never get high off your own supply.
You can't help him only professionals can. So don't think the two of you can tactic this problem alone.
Next why are you dating a drug dealer? Don't you know if he would have been caught with drugs on in his car or home your placing yourself at risk on going down too? You don't want to be in jail and a lot of females are behind bars because of their drug dealing boyfriends.
This habit he have isn't one that you can just quit cold turkey. He needs people around him that helps people with this problem.
Well we are both 19, and I'm very much in love with him. It's a fairly new relationship but we have known each other for a very long time. We have recently about a week ago gotten very serious. According to him and his family he is now 6 days sober.
He's already been dishonest with you why would you want to continue?read up on the absolute horror stories people go through with addicts,some that are related and you know you can't pick relatives.remember he's on his absolute best behavior right now picture him high,mad and stealing from you and everyone else he knows.you have to look down the road a bit you'r in for a whole lot of trouble that you can avoid by making the right decision's now
If it's only been serious for a week then it's probably because he needs someone to help him detox.Quote:
Originally Posted by bc472556
I've been involved with druggies and heroin - I would not trust anything that they say.
I'd have my BS radar out and in good working order if I were you.
We'll I just don't know how to get rid of him if he hasn't done it in how ever many days and I have no reason not to trust. But I'm confused and I have no one to talk to about it.
If I were you I would run far far away. Drugs and relationships do not go well together. Many men who use drugs abuse their spouses. My daughter's father was on drugs and abused me for about 2 years before I finally left him.
Run as fast as you can! You can find someone who is not on drugs that can treat you the way that you need to be treated, rather than you helping him kick drugs. You two need to go your separate ways and you need to find someone without any baggage.
I wasted three years of my life on my daughter's father trying to help him kick drugs and trying to show him a better life than he had, but he just sucked my down with him and screwed me over. I wasted so much money, time and effort on him for nothing. I will never take it back because I got my daughter out of everything and I learned a lot about life, but it was a hard lesson to learn and I hope that you don't go down that road. You are young, live your life for you, not for someone else. Good luck!
More than likely he was a middle man cause that is how they operate. Get the drugs from the dealer and get a little supply of their own from the dealer and some from the addict for dealing the transaction so they don't have to buy their own.Quote:
Originally Posted by liz28
OP you need to watch and see if he actually quits before you get in any deeper with him.
You can be a moral supporter to encourage him to quit but don't fall for him claiming he quit if he didn't. Often guys will say whatever it takes that they think you want to hear to keep it all good.
Since when do we have to wait to be mistreated to break up with someone?Quote:
Originally Posted by bc472556
You know what you are up against and he needs to be focusing on his recovery, not a girlfriend. In fact, recovery groups highly recommend staying out of relationships throughout the first year of recovery. You will be a hindrance to his progress if you stay in the relationship. He has to get clean for him, by himself.
Let him go so that he can work on the things he needs to do without you being overly involved. Your life will be a lot less dramatic, if you stay uninvolved.
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