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I have been dating my current boyfriend for almost 2 years, but somehow, I just recently began having feelings toward my ex. I dumped my ex a little over 2 years ago because I felt he was immature, but now I don't know what's going on. What should I do??
Way Confused!! :confused:
I'm no expert in relationships, but what came to mind when I read your post was, maybe there is something in your current boyfriend that reminds you of your ex in some way, so therefore it's bringing up feelings of being with your ex. You say that you left him (ex) because of his immaturity, so if that was the only reason, then maybe the feelings for your ex are still there (well obviously they are still there otherwise you wouldn't be posting this lol) but what I mean is buried feelings prehaps, that you had never really let go of and the reason why your with your current partner is because subconsciously he has similar characteristics of your ex,if immaturity is the only reason for splitting up, you have prehaps found a replacement for your ex but on a more mature level?
I hope that made sense lol
Sounds like your current boyfriend is a rebound from your ex.
How did your feelings suddendly resurface? Have you been in contact with your ex?
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Originally Posted by I wish
I agree. Current boyfriend for almost two years and dumped your ex a LITTLE over two years ago. Sounds like a rebound to me.
And it sounds like you've made contact with your ex on more then one occasion. Two years of NC with your ex, you should be well over him by now. You haven't told us the whole story, or at least some of it to make sense of your feelings coming back to your ex.
He and I had a class together this semester. And after I dumped him I dated another guy for a month or so and then we decided we were better off as friends. My ex and I stayed close friends, but I didn't know what to think when I started to have feelings again. However, there is nothing in my current boyfriend that reminds me of him; other than the fact that they both play golf, they are two opposite ends of the spectrum.
If you stayed as friends with your ex, then you never gave yourself a chance to get over him. These feelings didn't "resurface," they were already there and you are simply just noticing them now.Quote:
Originally Posted by Animal0126
Obviously you are rethinking your choice, and that is natural. If he fixed whatever quality that you thought wasn't what you wanted then maybe now he is more appealing to you. However, the fact that you couldn't accept him and work through it the first time shows more about yourself then you may want to realize.
Leaving someone over a single characteristic, without being willing to work through it, is more of an indication on your own character and is something that you need to figure out on your own. I feel bad for your current boyfriend, because he deserves someone who will be committed entirely to him. If you cannot give him that then you should be honest with him and leave now, before you end up breaking his heart any more than you already will.
Figure out what you want for yourself before you start looking for it in someone else.
~ Tee
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Originally Posted by Animal0126
This is why you don't look or give a chance to a possible rebound. You need all that emotional stress to wear off, so that there's no feelings left for anyone. Your rebound only temoprarily hid your feelings for your ex that you dumped.
You should think about this, while you're single. Do not jump from man to man, that will only make you miserable.
But the thing is, I am extremely happy with the guy I am with now, otherwise, I would've dumped him a long time ago. They were just a few feelings and I still devote my entire life to my current boyfriend, and he does the same. I'm happy, so why would I get rid of that feeling?
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