Mixed Messages, does she like me?
1st time on this kind of forum but through I'd give it a try as there is something that is driving me crazy.
I really like this girl at work who has been with us for about 1 & 1/2 years now but I seem to be getting mixed messages as to whether she likes me.
Sorry this may go on a bit but I just wanted to make the picture as clear as possible.
She is very pretty and seems a really nice genuine person and everyone at work seems to like her. She is of Chinese descent and her English isn't great, she works in a different department to me but on the same floor so plenty of chances to say hello when walking past each other in the corridor. When she first started we would be polite and say hello but over time I started to think that she seemed intersted in me. Whenever I asked for anything from her when in her department she seemed over helpful but nervous at the same time. Also I was starting to make a conscious effort to catch her eye and see her response and she always gave me a really big smile.
Anyway back in January I wished her a Happy New Year (Chinese new year) to try and strike up a conversation with her. She seemed pleased to have the conversation and mentioned a few work colleagues were going out lunchtime for a Chinese meal to celebrate and did I want to come. After the meal she made a point to say it was a shame we didn't get to talk (I was at the other end of the table) - All possitive stuff.
Over the last few months we seem to be sending each other a lot of e mails, nothing too flirty but she seems to want me to continue communication in this way. From my side it's great as it's less obvious to other work colleagues that we are communicating a lot to avoid any rumours starting. Also some verbal conversations have ended up with us both confused due to the language barrier.
The problem is that she isn't being very flirty and sometimes she seems to deliberately ignore me like not looking up at me when I pass her in the office and when she passes my office she always looks straight ahead as if trying to ignore me. Now maybe it's my imagination and because I often will look over at her if passing that I sometimes feel maybe she doesn't like me and wants me to leave her alone. Also I should say I don't think I'm that good looking, pretty average and I wonder if she is out of my league so the slightest thing like this knocks my confidence.
2 other girls in the office are quite flirty with me, making fun of me and grabbing my arm/shoulder etc. Both of them always acknowledge me and go out of their way to come into my office and flirt a little. So it makes me wonder why she isn't more like this if she does like me. Maybe she's just shy but I'm more used to girls that like me being more obvious.
Anyway on the flip side I recently went to catch an after work meal with the two other girls mentioned above. However when I arrived at the restaurant I found at that a number of other girls from work were also going including the girl I like. I felt a bit outnumbered being the only guy there and yet again she was at the other end of the table but she made a special effort to aknowlege my prescence with a wave and big smile. We didn't speak that much but did manage to have a bit of a laugh with each other with me trying to show her my limited Chinese vocabulary.
The next day at work in the Kitchen when I was on my own she came in and asked if I had had a good time and said that the girls have a meal once a month and I should come again. I agreed so as to seem possitive about the invite which I normally wouldn't do being invited to an all female night out as it seemed a bit strange.
A few days ago she sent me an e mail saying "Hey JFY" copying me in on an e mail from another girl that was organising the night out. I thanked her for the invite but declined as I couldn't make it but took the opportunity to invite her to a birthday celebration I was organising for myself with work colleagues. Even though at that stage I couldn't confirm the date or venue she said she would love to come and whatever I decided she was available.
The problem is yet again over the last few days I get mixed messages with her being warm and friendly at times and ignoring me completely at others.
If we didn't work in the same company I would have asked her out a long time ago but the fear of rejection has put me off as I could end up looking a fool.
Sorry this has gone on so long but can any women shed any light into what might be going on with her feelings towards me with this kind of behaviour.
