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-   -   Upset sisters (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=354350)

  • May 15, 2009, 05:31 PM
    bredesen
    Upset sisters
    My 14 year old sister is very upset with my parents lately.. my mother is very why all the time and yells at her a lot about nothing just to yell at her, example she was cleaning the house the other day and got yelled at? My mohter has always been very rude and mean to us she has 11 kids and all the daughters have never been close to her. Me sister is coming to me for help to get out of the house but she won't let her leave. Constantly getting yelled at is taking a toll on her she's only 14 I don't think she should have to go through this. Should I confront my mother about it? I feel a strong need to help my sister, I've been there and wanted to take my life at 15 because of her? What can I do to help? My dad is very close to me but when my mother is around she is constantly yelling so he can't even think for himself.:confused:
  • May 15, 2009, 05:47 PM
    Jake2008
    11 kids? That is a lot to manage, I think I'd be screaming a lot too.

    It sounds like your younger sister is expected to take on more of an adult role. The continuous yelling is abusive, and does nothing to nurture a healthy teenager- actually quite the opposite.

    I'm not sure why you want to confront your mother. Is it to try to change her behaviour, or is to try to convince her that your sister is better of living with you.

    Is she the type of person that will have a reasonable conversation about the distress of your sister, or will she just fluff it off.

    I don't know if you have considered just allowing her to move in, even on a trial basis, to give your mother, and your sister a break from each other. Would that be a better approach for now?

    Your sister is lucky to have you in her corner, and you know from personal experience how your mother can negatively affect your life to the point of considering suicide.

    If you are seeing these signs now in your sister you might also want to consider speaking to a school counsellor, or seek advice from a lawyer, or a children's aid society. If you feel so strongly about her situation, I would say that gathering up all the information you can to support your case is a good idea.
  • May 15, 2009, 06:02 PM
    bredesen

    Mt mother has never really been there for her kids none of them, I'm not saying that my sister should come live with me I've never thought about it, and what about my other sisters at home there is 5 kids still there? I can't afford to support them. If I could I would do it in a heart beat! My mother honestly doesn't care about how my sisters feel she never did when I was there either... in my 24 years of life I don't remember her saying I love you to me once! And what about my dad? How do I tell him?

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