I feel like the world is crushing me and I don't know how much longer I can last I look around me and see lots not all but lots of happy people and I just don't see me like that ever I mean I have barely been ever been touched like touching my hand or stuff like that and now I feel like I get real weird when someone does. I can't seem to do the things that everyone else does as a everyday thing I never had a girlfriend my life feels pointless and I barely fill like getting up anymore I vision my own suicide but don't do it and medicin makes me feel a false happiness and all religion does is drive me more crazy. I feel like a outsider and theirs no getting in the few friends that I have I always get paranoid and think they hate me ahhhhhhhh what should I do