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-   -   How do you make new friends? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=35250)

  • Sep 27, 2006, 08:05 AM
    ladymuck
    How do you make new friends?
    Does anyone have any suggestions on how to make new friends. Maybe it's a lack of 30 something's that live in my area but I've tried posting on a local website and all that got me was foreigners wanting more than friendship and 20 something year olds... how do you make new friends of your own age? Ive also joined an activity club but that turns out to me people older than me.. which I don't exactly have a problem with but the activities that they are arranging seem to me to be more for the over 50 year olds, just not my idea of fun I'm afraid. Its not like I don't have any friends.. its just that they are dotted around the country now so makes short notice going out a problem.
  • Sep 27, 2006, 12:45 PM
    J_9
    You don't mention a job.

    For me, I went back to college. Now I have a covey of new friends that I hope to have for a lifetime.

    I am 42, so no the majority of my school mates are not right out of high school. If you go to a collge, like a Community College, you will notice that the 30 and 40 something's are the majority on campus, not the younger folk.

    It may help just to take a class or 2 that interest you.
  • Sep 27, 2006, 12:55 PM
    ladymuck
    Thanks for the reply.

    I do work but for a small family run business with 4 guys who again are not my age so we don't socialise.

    I have been looking at doing an evening course actually in hope that that may help, haven't found anything that's interested me enough yet but hopefully something will pop up.
  • Sep 27, 2006, 12:57 PM
    J_9
    Hey, I loved going back to school. I started on a part-time basis and was able to receive financial assistance. It has completely broadened my circle of friends, where I had none before, I have MANY now!
  • Oct 25, 2006, 04:12 PM
    velvetjones
    I had a hard time at school because the only people that wanted to be my "friends" were a naughty student guy and one of the instructors. Maybe now that I'm older it would be easier? I have always had a hard time.
  • Nov 23, 2006, 12:29 PM
    posheak
    If you want to make new friends your age then go places people your age hang out at. Meeting people is easy, the first step is saying "hi", then come up with something to talk about. The earth consists of billions of people someone is bound to be your friend.
    If you are in an area where you can do so, take up skiing. I swear it's the best way to meet people. You ski, then you hang out in the lounge. The age range is huge and likewise the kinds of people involved.
    Hope this helps.
  • Feb 15, 2007, 03:02 AM
    CastawayChris
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ladymuck
    Does anyone have any suggestions on how to make new friends. Maybe its a lack of 30 somethings that live in my area but ive tried posting on a local website and all that got me was foreigners wanting more than friendship and 20 something year olds... how do you make new friends of your own age? Ive also joined an activity club but that turns out to me people older than me.. which i dont exactly have a problem with but the activities that they are arranging seem to me to be more for the over 50 year olds, just not my idea of fun im afraid. Its not like i dont have any friends.. its just that they are dotted around the country now so makes short notice going out a problem.

    The answer is to stop looking for friends, and focus on getting involved with things you are interested in. If your primary focus is making new friends, you will only meet these 2 groups of people: 1) lonely desperate people who are needy and don't have much to give a friendship, 2) guys looking for sex

    Forget about friends for a while - even if you are lonely, just force yourself. Get involved in activities you are interested in - cooking, hiking, yoga, whatever - you will meet people with similar interests. If you focus on the common interest, you will end up making plans to do this interest more. Still do not think of anything like friendship. Inevitabley, there will be some you relate to on more levels than just activity, and frienships will develop from natrually, as opposed to being fake, and short lived.
  • Feb 25, 2007, 10:10 PM
    forreal
    I'm in my 30's and I'm still trying to figure out on how to make news friends.
  • Feb 27, 2007, 06:46 PM
    Bluerose
    The WEB is a wonderful resource and not just for making cyber friends but for finding out where everyone else goes. Clubs and pubs, keep fit, join armature dramatics, help out as a volunteer, join or even start a book club, arrange to have your own coffee mornings by sticking a few invitation cards through doors in your street of people your age.

    You need to be four things - proactive, friendly, determined, and a little pushy.

    You never know what or who you might stumble over while researching all the options mentioned above.

    One thing is for sure… There will never be a knock on your door and someone standing there saying, “Hi! I'm you're new friend!”

    Get out and about! There are millions of people all over the place thinking and wanting the same thing. And a few of them are just waiting to meet you. Good luck.
  • Mar 13, 2007, 03:31 PM
    psychicangel1
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by ladymuck
    Does anyone have any suggestions on how to make new friends. Maybe its a lack of 30 somethings that live in my area but ive tried posting on a local website and all that got me was foreigners wanting more than friendship and 20 something year olds... how do you make new friends of your own age? Ive also joined an activity club but that turns out to me people older than me.. which i dont exactly have a problem with but the activities that they are arranging seem to me to be more for the over 50 year olds, just not my idea of fun im afraid. Its not like i dont have any friends.. its just that they are dotted around the country now so makes short notice going out a problem.

    I DO.. wow.. I only have found success in joining groups.
    I suggest you use online groups : sierra club in your area
    SUPER cool people...
    //www.meetup.com/about/

    Also,I focused on women's groups.. with the odd group being
    Too nerdy... keep trying...
  • Mar 14, 2007, 06:01 PM
    rosy_123
    Maybe you can check out some local art shows if you're into that. Or music, exhibits in museums, things like that. I'm in the same boat, and finally got to the place where castaway chris was talking about, just kind of doing my own thing and looking more into my interests. Do you go to bars? ;)
  • Mar 25, 2007, 03:56 PM
    Redbone
    I'm in My 30's and I have never met anybody that I didn't think of as a friend. I just be myself and have enough confidence that I can hopefully make a difference in somebody's life. I am a people person. I guess that helps. Just know what your goals are and be yourself. Enjoy the little things from anybody no matter their age. Age is nothing but numbers. If you let that get in your way then You will lose out.

    That is just my opinion and it may work for me and I hope that it will help you.
    One of the reasons that I joined this website was so that I can maybe help somebody in need. That is what I enjoy doing. Good luck and have a great day

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