My girlfriend and I broke up after roughly 2 years together about 7 weeks ago (she broke up with me - we are both 27 years old now). The breakup was a bit unexpected, and we had a great relationship with some problems that were completely workable. After a few weeks of trying to fix things and talk with her to no avail I've gone with no contact. I am now hearing that she still is unsure whether she made the right choice, and has said more than once that "If we get back together I know we won't break up again." to her friends... as well as wanting to contact me, but not feeling ready to yet.

Additionally ALL of our friends, who've known us for many years, say they think things will work out and that we should be together, and that she's just going through something before she can settle down. Personally I am not just sulking, I've got a therapist and have continued to have fun with friends and keeping busy exercising etc... but I do honestly believe this is the girl I want to, and will marry as I still love her with all my heart. Are these all signs I should remain a bit hopeful?

These are signs you two have feelings for each other, but I don't see how that has anything to do with your relationship. If the problems could have been worked out in the first place and she ran, what makes you think she wouldn't do this in the future?

What you are feeling is normal, and almost EVERY single break up encounters emotions like this. I don't think you should read into anything, as her actions have clearly shown you she is not ready for anything... and maybe never will be with you.

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Originally Posted by kctiger

These are signs you two have feelings for each other, but I don't see how that has anything to do with your relationship. If the problems could have been worked out in the first place and she ran, what makes you think she wouldn't do this in the future?

What you are feeling is normal, and almost EVERY single break up encounters emotions like this. I don't think you should read into anything, as her actions have clearly shown you she is not ready for anything...and maybe never will be with you.

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Well I know this breakup is spurred more from her feeling unsure about herself/career... none of her friends quite know what is going on, but they are all saying that this didn't have to do with us or our problems necessarily, but more that she needs time to sort something out for herself.. which is why I said the breakup was unexpected. I'm looking at this as objectively as I can, and I know that it's still not a good sign that we're not apart - but I am re-affirmed by those who know us that it wasn't because we had a doomed relationship.

Looks like she is trying to feed her vanity, with things like I love you but I am not sure about us.

She knows you still care for her, and it looks to me she is feeding her ego here.

For is she wanted to be with you.. she would say.. hey lets be together.
Not Yeah.. No.

And be real mate.. you are not looking at this objectively. Because you still have FEELINGS for her. We are the ones that can look at it, objectively.
I'm sorry but no matter how logical you want to be, it will not work. As you are to close to the matter. To see

And as for you talking to hera friends?

First of big mistake. And yeah that's the thing with people no one really can tell what they are going to do from one second to the next.

Do not rely on her friends for input, or reassurance. Because in the end they will not help you guys get back together!

The only person that can do that. Is you two
Or her now being she is the one that broke up with you.

In my view I would leave this girl and get on with your life. Don't wait around for someone to say yes OK now I'm ready for you back in my life..
I mean is that what you want? Someone that leaves you or brakes up with because they are in a jam?

Or do you want someone that will be with you no matter what?

I know you feel it.. you know that this is not good. And you know that this is not right, and this is not how it should be. Go with your feelings on this one
In the end it is up to you.

I hope you make the right choice

I don't understand this excuse yet a lot of people use it. I'm having personal problems and until I sort them out I can't have a relationship with you. Do you ever hear of anyone saying that to their mother or sister or just a regular friend? No. Then what does having personal issues have to do with being with someone? Why is it an excuse to bail on a relationship and people accept that as being the reason? It can't be...