Consumed with guilt for breaking my boyfriend's heart
I endured a year and a half relationship with my boyfriend. He was not affectionate, did not make me a priority and our sex life has been terrible for a year. I tried many times to break up, but he would always talk me out of it. When I was angry with him, he would become adorable, caring and kind. He also figured out that I will stay with someone out of pity and used it to his advantage.
So, I finally broke up with him and stood my ground. It was awful. Terrible. Broke my heart as usual, but this time I followed through. I'm feeling really guilty and he keeps leaving these messages and I can hear his distress in his voice.
Am I doing the right thing? Gosh, I tried everything to get us back on track romantically, but he just shut down and wouldn't be romantic at all. In truth, I think we were just so different. But he's a lonely guy. He has an incredibly hard time with interpersonal relationships due to his childhood. But he was incredibly quiet with my family and it always bothered me. Also, he was glued to his blackberry and didn't understand why it would bother me. On vacations, instead of his blackberry, he became similarly obsessed with taking pictures. Blaaaahhhh!
We sat in near silence at many restaurants. He wouldn't smile and the only things he liked to talk about were negative (i.e. people he was angry with or service that wasn't done properly)... Nitpicky. He dominated the remote, ignored me in favor of watching TV and REFUSED to EVER give me a back massage, but wanted many massages himself. Grrrrrr.
Okay, I get that he sounds awful, but he did sweet things too, on occasion. And I truly did care for him.
I guess what I'm asking is how to get over my guilt. In all this, I feel that I let him down by breaking up with him. I know his heart is breaking. Any advice would be lovely.
I wanted him to be able to open up, but is it my responsibility to stay with someone who is unhappy?
Help!