I was hoping you guys could help me understand a few things.

Its been two months since I have been broken up with my ex, lets call him "John" and I have been trying to get him back. The issue here is that he doesn't trust or believe me.

To make it short...
I had friends who would invites us to go out and would also invite my ex, let call this guy "Mat"... there was no respect for my relationship with John. I did what I could to cut those people off but I kept on getting phone call and invites. It was hard to cut them out of my life but it was worth it!

To top it off, I happen to work the Mat. John knew this when we started going out. I didn't hide it and I was very open and honest.

Another problem that happened was that John caught me briefly talking online to Mat, he was just saying hi and trying to talk me about an issue he had at home. I was scared to tell him because we have had fight about him often, so I hide it and he caught me. I lied to him.

I never went out, I was always with him. I was basically living with him and we had plans of getting engaged and planning a wedding for next year.

I am truly sad and I don't know what to do.

Stopping all contact with the ex would have been a good start, then you won't have to lie or hide things. Turning down invites where the ex will be helps also.

I know you work together, but keep it strictly business, and let that be the only contact. Lying, and hiding things, only makes an insecure boyfriend, even more so.

I did turn them down, all the time.

He doesn't want to be with me. Is it completely over or is it okay to have some hope. Is space and time what he needs to forgive me.

Two months is a fairly decent amount of time for him to rethink his initial decision and get back to you if he wanted to reunite.

I think it is pretty clear that he has not had a change of heart and I think you need to accept that this is over.

Maybe the jealousy issue was just an excuse to cut out of the relationship.That way he could blame you instead of just saying he wasn't interested anymore.

Bottom line,if he wanted to be with you ,he would have made some attempt at contact by now.

We talked a couple of days ago... he was going to pass by to drop something I needed that I left in his car...

Three weeks after the break up he contacted me asking how I was doing and we have been back and fourth...

I will go a week without calling/emailing or texting, then I just find an excuse to message him.

It's OK to have little set backs here and there, we're human. We all make mistakes. The difference from that is to what we make of our mistakes.

Learn from them and try to be strong for the sake of yourself. Stay out of his life to see what YOU want. It may seem to be him at the moment, but give yourself time. I promise you it's for the better.

How can you be with someone that doesn't trust you? He will always be up on your back if you guys get back together and wonder where you are and who you are with.

I suggest stopping contnact with him and find someone that can trust you and love you. And no you can't get your ex back, he will come back if he loves you.

That isn't as clear as you could have made it, but me and my ex had a similar problem. I got really angry with her. I don't care if she talks to him, so long as she says she is. If she lies then the guy will ask why is she lying. It is better to tell the truth. You have a right to talk to whoever you want

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Lying, and hiding things, only makes an insecure boyfriend, even more so.

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You think that maybe he has his own problems that need to be dealt with? You may of made mistakes, but where the a reaction to his own actions?

Either way, no matter who did what, if he is not willing to work with you, then this is a dead relationship, and you need to heal, and get a better boyfriend.

Like just tell him how you feel if you love him then tell him if he loves you he will forgive you if he doesn't then you know what that means sorry to sound so harsh but that's the reality!

We spent the weekend together and it was perfect. I felt like I was in heaven but now his family his upset that we are back together...

Now he says he needs space... I'm all confused

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Originally Posted by GirlInLove26

Now he says he needs space....i'm all confused

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Typical. If I had a penny for every time I heard this, I'd be so rich by now. He used you so he wouldn't feel lonely. Now that the weekend is gone, he's confused again.

Why are you still in this? Its just going to be a circle, the same things will just happen until he is fed up and leaves you with nothing.

Move on. Stop contacting him or find things the hard way and keep what you're doing only to find yourself wasting time.