In a nutshell…

Im not sure what Im doing here…I am in a long distance relationship with a lovely lady, she lives about 5 hours drive from me…we try our best to meet when we can, we enjoy each others company, and always have wonderful times together. After a year, however, I am wondering if she ever will move south to be with me. Regardless, there is no rushing her…

That said, I am also a musician, and have a very vibrant social life. On the scene there is this girl. She is my age. She is married, and she and her man host BBQ’s and get togethers at their house for all the local shows. Everyone is friends with everyone else, ad these two always make room for people to crash out. I have known these fools for almost 3 years now, and we are all almost like family.

So, this weekend, we had a big gig, and I was invited over to the pre show BBQ as always. I was just texting back and forth with the hostess, and she cracked a joke about my “date” (our friend who was visiting)…and I made some offhand comment about “what u have a crush on her or something” and she wrote back, :no, YOU!”

See, this is where it gets really messed up. Since the moment I ever met her, I have been dazzled by this woman. She has the BEST smile, she always takes care of EVERYONE without ever making a stink…she is just the BOMB! I NEVER have told her this, and I never would have, but she basically let it be known that she really likes me…and isn’t afraid to act on it…

Which we did…

And now HE knows…and she said “you did nothing to apologize for…this has been a long time coming.”

Im all messed up now. And I'm so madly in love. I don’t know what to do…

I'm confused, are you dating this woman? Are you just madly in love with her? Or is she cheating on her husband?

Whether you say yes or no to any of those questions, the response is the same:

STAY AWAY FROM HER!

She's a married woman.

She's married.

She is not available.

Period.

I agree, don't touch this woman with a 50 foot pole.

Here she is, not only trying to cheat on her husband, but being dirty enough to to do so with him there? So brazen and heartless enough to not care about his feelings?

A cheater is a cheater is a cheater. Right now its all fun and games to her, you're the sport. What do you think is going to happen once she gets you? A happily ever after into the sunset? IF she even leaves her husband then do you think she will be loyally at your side? No. She will get bored and do the same thing to you that she is doing to her husband.

Imagine if you were him. How would you feel about this? Save yourself the trouble now and leave that fox to the hounds.

I read it a few times and am confused. You are "dating" this girl who lives 5 hours away but at some BBQ this weekend you hooked up with a married girl who is around your age?

How old is the girl who lives 5 hours away, and which one do you want?

Or am I completely off base and didn't understand the post?

What ever it is that you're doing with the married woman - Stop. Now.

Your vibrant social life will come to a crashing halt if you don't control yourself.

You're madly in lust not madly in love. Get a grip on reality and take your hand off your d***k.

This will only end in tears. Lots of them.

If her husband knows, and she says you've done nothing to apologize for then I'd say let them work it out.

How much MORE do you want to be confused? If I read this right, you just had an affair with, not only , a married woman, but with the wife of your friend... and you start the conversation talking about ANOTHER woman... first of all, do the "other" woman a favor and let her go, you obviously don't care much about her if you slept with someone else...

I am wondering why you would be texting back and forth to this "hostess"... I have always wondered about men who are better "friends" with the wife of the married couple than the husband... and vice versa... seems to me, your feelings towards this woman were apparent BEFORE she admitted that she wanted you... by "texting" her, you have been carrying on a "private" conversation with her and leaving her husband out... you did not treat them as a married couple but as a woman and a separate man... you didn't even care enough about her husband to consider his feelings, so why are you confused? You cheated on your long distance friend, so let her go,. you cheated on this married woman's husband, so that friendship is probably dead now, and so that leaves you with this woman who cheats on her husband... go for it... I think you deserve each other...