Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Relationships (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=277)
-   -   Love Problems (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=348675)

  • May 2, 2009, 05:02 AM
    akhil6943
    Love Problems
    Dear Friend
    Pleade do help me
    I am in relationship from past 2 years.Thing is that we both love each other a lot.
    We were in same co. same city,that time we used lots of time together.we chat on phone for hours and hours but now I am in different city from 1 year.these days when I call her she never picke up the phone(said she is in office in other desk doing work,sumtime said I iwith my parents can't talk).when I send sms she never replied on time.she replied after long time.when she wants to talk me she call me but when I miss her I am not able to call her.
    I told her about the problem that I miss her a lot .we have so good communication talk bet'n us.sh said she will try to be as I like.she changed her only for few days then again she is doing same thing.
    Day by day I am getting frustrated.

    Que 1:-So what should I do?
    Que 2:-If you love someone can't you expect same love return back?
    Que 3 :-How can I change her nature?
    Que 4:-Some said in love you just need to give and give.I deed the same thing but can't keep on alone in love?

    Please do help me.I need your advice.
  • May 2, 2009, 06:41 AM
    De4rest

    Hey there,

    Q2: No, there is no measurement in love.
    Q3: All I can say is that you cannot change people. Although if you tried to it would not be good in the end for both of you. People will change if they choose to and willing to change not because of what others say or did. It has to come from her.
    Q4: Maybe, but all I can say is that there should be a balance in a rel. You take and give. My thinking is that you should not take more than you give. I would def. give more esp. if that person is someone I love. You can't force someone to do something because it can just drawn them away from you.

    SO, Q1 will be: You just tell her that you love her, wanting to visit, would appreciate more if she pick up the phone and call you more because that way you will feel a lot closer to her. Tell her you know that she's busy but ask if she can be consistent about calling you. If she can't you just have to let it go. Maybe you two are not meant to be together. Tell her what you want, then ask what does she want. Being open and honest about it helps.

    Another one: If you give love, you will get love back. If you are sincere about it, she will too. That's my view.

    I hope it helps.
  • May 2, 2009, 06:50 AM
    Bluerose

    I'm sorry but what will it take for you to realise that the woman is not interested. It's time to get out and about where you are and meet some new people.
  • May 2, 2009, 07:59 AM
    I wish

    First off, you should put your email public fory our own personal security. We will help you from this forum. If you want to speak with someone specific, then use the private message feature.

    Long distance is very tough. Without constant communication, it's easy to feel distant from the other person. There's a reason why she's not contacting you. But you've already tried to contact her so many times, so she knows that you're looking for her. I suggest that you back off for a while to wait and see. She will find you when she wants to talk.

    I know it's tough to wait, but it will just hurt you more if you keep contacting her and she doesn't return your calls or sms. Keep yourself busy while you wait.
  • May 2, 2009, 09:17 AM
    talaniman

    Quote:

    We have so good communication talk between us. She said she will try to be as I like. She changed her only for few days then again she is doing same thing.
    If you really did communicate as you say you do, you would have worked something out that you both agree on. This sounds like she was placating you.
    Quote:

    Day by day I am getting frustrated.
    Why are you in different places and is there a reason you haven't set up times to talk and visit?
    Que 1:-So what should I do?
    Communicate to her some more about how you feel.
    Que 2:-If you love someone can't you expect same love return back?
    Sure you can, but getting what they have to give may not be enough
    Que 3 :-How can I change her nature?
    You can't, but you can adjust your own by having other things beside her to keep you busy. What should she drop her life to do as you say? Obviously she wont.
    Que 4:-Some said in love you just need to give and give.I deed the same thing but can't keep on alone in love?
    Who said that??? Any way working together to solve your problem, thru honest communications is what you need, and what you don't have.

    Long distance relationships are hard on even the most mature couple, and there is a lot of pressure that the distance puts on a couple in that circumstance. Maybe this will help guide you to a better understanding.

    Long Distance Relationship Advice | The Frisky,

    I think having a agreed upon time to talk would help you.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:39 PM.