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-   -   My girlfriend wants a break. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=348252)

  • May 1, 2009, 12:11 AM
    Fydor Bloom
    My girlfriend wants a break.
    I know this is a common problem: my girlfriend wants a break. We've been dating for almost two years and she has always told that I am the best thing that has ever happened to her.

    Which is why this situation is so confusing. And you need to know that this is the longest relationship either one of us has ever had and she has had a lot of cheating/lying/db's as boy friends.

    Of course I've just assumed that she want's to break up with me and just didn't have the heart to tell me; but it's a bit more complicated than that. We actually live together and still share the same bed. What more, I've tried to move out to give her some space but she begged me not to said she wanted me her for her.

    But this situation is very painful for me and I've come right out and told her how I felt and how I thought she was only trying to break up with me. But replied that she wants to do this for our relationship -- to make it stronger or whatnot -- and assures me that I will not lose her no matter what.

    So... I have no idea what to do... I need help!
  • May 1, 2009, 01:37 AM
    myuz
    Is she maybe doing it so she can see someone else? Tough situation man. Give her the time and space , maybe sleep on the couch. Let her come back to you. Let her know you care and will be there for her if she needs it.
  • May 1, 2009, 04:20 AM
    ROLCAM

    They (females) seem to always get what they want.
    Ask her to be specific as to her wishes.
    Clear communication is essential here.
    Do not be treated like a puppy.
    I hope things will eventually work out.
    Final word, one sometimes need to be cruel.
  • May 1, 2009, 05:40 AM
    kctiger

    Move out, and give her space. She can't just ask for space and expect you to mope around your place like a wounded dog. She is still extremely comfortable with you around and it is hard to let you go, but she also had the nerve to ask for a break, which means she clearly doesn't feel the same way about you. If anything, you staying there while on "break" is counter-productive to making the relationship "stronger."

    Get away from her so you can both see, from a clear vantage point, what this relationship is, and perhaps isn't.
  • May 1, 2009, 06:22 AM
    liz28

    Who cares what she wants? You have to do what is right for you?

    If something is bothering her she should be able to communicate it to you not ask for a break. You ask your job for a break not your man.

    The best thing for you to do is move out. It is going kill you inside if you continue living together. But I guess she doesn't care about your feelings only hers, that is called being selfish and a contradiction.

    Know that most breaks are permanent and you're a free man to do what you want. Not do what she wants. Can you handle seeing her with another guy while she is on a break from you?

    She ask for this not you so she can't tell you want she did but added conditions to it. It doesn't work this way. So again, for your own piece of mind leave.
  • May 1, 2009, 06:26 AM
    talaniman

    When you live with someone you should make sure they explain what the heck they mean, just to be clear. So what else is really going on here?
  • May 1, 2009, 06:35 AM
    Romefalls19

    There is something seriously missing from this story, don't sleep there! She asked for space and a break, have the set to walk out and find somewhere else to stay until she sorts her head out. The main thing about a break is to define what exactly it is, time is a big thing. If she can't give you one, it's a break up, I think it's a break up now to be honest. Don't be her cuddle toy
  • May 1, 2009, 09:28 AM
    Fydor Bloom

    I'm not sure she knows what she wants right now. The other day we were a the mall and she was holding my hand the whole time, and since we've been on a "break" we've actually been spending more time together. Also the other night she offered me sex.
    I don't know if she just likes the title or is really confused. I believe her when she says that it's only a break, she has always been completely honest with me about everything, things any normal person would lie about. But I also feel like I need to move out so the break will actually work the way she thinks it will.
  • May 1, 2009, 09:39 AM
    liz28

    Follow your instincts by moving out. You stated your girlfriend is honest so what was the cause for the break when the two of you are carrying on like a couple? I confused!
  • May 1, 2009, 09:53 AM
    liz28
    I erased this post because it was a duplicate post of the post above.
  • May 1, 2009, 10:21 AM
    Fydor Bloom
    She is honest. She says that she is doing this because she is too dependent on me, which she is. I'll just give her her space and hope it works out
  • May 1, 2009, 10:27 AM
    Romefalls19

    Give her space and build your life around your own hobbies, without her

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