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-   -   Acceptance as lesbian (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=346694)

  • Apr 27, 2009, 09:58 AM
    ilumination
    Acceptance as lesbian
    Hi, I live here in ireland the last 6 years but have yet to find out why I am not accept with my own people here(lesbians ie). I find it very frustrating to search friends, but other than a conversation where I am from, what brings me here etc. there is no other offer of social events or contact. On the contrary I have been talked about, stabbed in the back and or just simply ignored. I find that I am a very social and approachable woman. I have traveled a lot in my life and never had any problems anywhere else. Is there some standard that I don't recognize or is it simply that irish do most keep to themselves? So far I am the only non- irish lesbian I have met. Hope you can shed some light to my dilemma.

    With regards and wishes of peace. Bri::(
  • Apr 27, 2009, 10:15 AM
    mudweiser

    Have you tried adult websites? Try joining a few, search within your city or the surrounding ones.

    Good luck to you,

    Sarah
  • Apr 27, 2009, 10:36 AM
    ilumination
    Yes I have, several to be honest, but the games they play there are a little on the side as I have experienced all together. I also have been to some functions hre and surroundings, with the same outcome of disapointment. Thanks for your reply though... :o
  • Apr 27, 2009, 10:39 AM
    mudweiser

    Just try being friends with them :)

    You can never have too many friends.

    Try and open yourself to non-lesbians too [for friendship].

    Sarah
  • May 7, 2009, 06:05 AM
    Ren6
    Where are you from originally? That might be the issue, sad to say. Other than that, maybe a move to a more accepting town would be an option? Galway seemed like a very accepting, diverse place in Ireland.
  • May 16, 2009, 10:04 AM
    0rphan

    Hi ilumination...

    I have worked with irish people and found that they are very outward, and extremely nosey, they want to know every bit of gossip going.


    They are lovely people it's just their way, so I find it extraordinary that they have shunned you.

    I know that they can be a very tight knit community, if they accept you that's fine, if not they just ignore you almost.

    You say that you have lived in Ireland for 6 years, so for one,your not irish and therefore not one of their own.

    In addition you are also a lesbian, so the way I see it is they have at least... in some of their eyes... two reasons to ignore you.

    I am so sorry that you have been treated like this, because it does not give the true picture of the irish people... they would give you their last penny and in my experience are truly very loving and giving to anyone who needs it.

    I suspect that the prime reason will be the lesbian issue... most irish are very religious so this would go against their teachings.

    Maybe it's possible for you to move to another part of Ireland, where you could restart again or perhaps not Ireland at all.

    Somewhere totally new, not everyone's views are of the same ilk.

    I wish you luck
  • May 31, 2009, 06:42 PM
    dontknownuthin

    Perhaps you are coming on too strong. I'd suggest that you observe others and see what you can learn about their culture and means for getting to know one another.

    The Irish are very engaging and friendly, conversational people. Perhaps something that would be normal in your home country is putting people off in your behavior. If you have any friends there at all, ask them and do not argue with their observations - listen as a student of life and see what you can learn from them. I doubt it has anything to do with sexual orientation - this sounds more like general social fitting- in.

    Best wishes.

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