I've been dating my first love on and off for four years. We dated other people and have our regrets. We realized we love each other and started talking as friends after not talking for about a year. Now the unexpected happened she is three months now and we argue about getting together. She says she's not ready for a relationship and we had a bad experience when I was living with her high school year. So she avoids talking to me and every time we do talk she treats me unfair. (shes 19 going on 20 by the way) so its Sunday and I call her to ask her if we can spend the day together and she says she don't want to see me. I tell her to go through the pregnancy without me hang up. I call back and she says she don't need me. Then me being a selfish male I tell her that the baby is probably her ex boyfriends.. she tells me I'm never going to see my baby and I will regret what I said. She told her mother and now I look so guilty. Well I am but I am so sorry for saying that. Now she don't answer my phone calls and I want to make up for it. What should I do? I want to prove to her I'm sorry and I know it is my baby. I told her sorry but she says "oh now its your baby" she's just a hard headed person but I want our relationship to become great again not just because the baby brought us closer but because I did the right thing as her man and as a father. Should I leave her alone? Should I call even though she's not going to answer? It all turns out negative someone please HELP?

Well you got a double whammy here, She is young and Extremely hormonal because of the pregnancy. I know when I was pregnant, I was beyond rational and I didn't even feel like myself, and the person that got on my nerves the most was my son's father. Well I loved him one minute and the next was a different story. I wanted to be around him, when he was not around and when I was with him I wanted to be away from him. Possibly she may be experiencing the same mixed emotions and mood swings.

You also did not help when you said the baby was not yours, if you truly believe the baby is in-fact your child you should not have said that and saying sorry now obviously does not cut it in her books. You should give her some time and possibly she will come around, but you should also make every effort to apologize to her and let her know how sorry you truly are for what you said.

By the way you also seem young are you both close in age. Because you guys are going to be parents soon, yes your going to be a role model to a human being so maybe the 2 of you need to do some growing up yourselves.

If you can't get to her and you want to show you really care about her then talk with her mother. Explain everything and make it the plan b if talking to her fails. Tell her that you want to be part of her grandchild's life even if it means so and so... spend some time thinking of what to say then go over to their house and try and say it. Good luck

I'm sorry, but you definitely said some harsh things to her. If my fiancé got pregnant and I even hinted at suggested it was someone else's I wouldn't be having any other babies because I wouldn't have the tools. That is the lowest of the low to tell a pregnant women. It's implies that she sleeps around and isn't sure of who the baby's father is, and just because you sleep on it for a day or so and feel guilty about it, doesn't mean she forgot about it. Women are like elephants, they remember EVERYTHING!

Hm, tell her you know you were wrong about what you said, and your going to be responsible about the situation and be there for her and your baby.

Leave her alone for a while, and get some respect for a pregnant female in you. No more relationship talk for a while. This is not about you any more.

Give her time.
This is an emotional time and you are just adding fuel to the fire at this point.

Let her have a week to calm down and then ask,with her parents if you can have a talk.She would appreciate it and so would the parents.You need them in your corner as well.

You all need to be on the same page here.What is best for the baby.

In future,think before you speak,it saves so much hassle in the long run.

Leave her alone for a while you can't just expect her to answer the phone to you and turn a blind eye to what you just said to her!! Come on now you have a lot of growing up to do your very immature if this is the way your going to act when you don't get your own way.

You need to realise that this is not all about you now there is a baby that you two have made together and if you do not think that you can care for this baby and the mother then get out now someone once said "its better to come from a broken home then to live in one" and straight off the mark this is not looking like a stable environment for a baby to be brought up in.

Okay so you two have had difficulties in the past oh well so what move the hell on there is no point in dwelling now that you know your child will be brought into the world you should alter your senses you are going to have to grow up quick.

If I were you I would leave her to cool down for a few days then call and ask her to meet you somewhere for a chat not your house and not hers somewhere neutral like a coffee shop, and talk seriously about the next step in your relationship explain that you were angry when you said what you said and ensure her that this kind of thing will never happen again no matter how mad you are you have had time to think it over and realise that it is not acceptable and hopefully she will think you have cop'd on a little and reconsider.

Its no excuse to say you were mad so you decided to say such a harsh thing as you did even if she makes you mad from time to time there is other way's to sort these things out rather then blurting out something that you are later going to regret you have some groveling to do son!

Best of luck :)

When your pregnant your very moody. I can't count the times I told my fiancé off and when I giving birth forget about it. I told everybody off, including the doctor and nurses. And I was pregnant during the summer so I was even more miserable.

Hopefully the two of you would settle your differences because after all the two of you are having a baby and no matter what your have to deal with each other for the next 18 years. So your have to get along for the child's sake and if she say something to piss you off something you have to ignore and let it go. Even if it is wrong.