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-   -   My best friend is cutting herself! (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=346249)

  • Apr 26, 2009, 09:55 AM
    kotaro19
    My best friend is cutting herself!
    I have known L almost my whole life and I grew up with her. She was always bottling stuff up and hardly ever opening herself to other people. When she finally did, it was only when she could not stand it anymore. I was happy that she trusted me enough to tell me her problems then.

    Her parents divorced 2 yrs ago. She didn't tell anyone nor showed any hint of being sad or depressed but I knew something was bothering her. When I confronted her about it, she spilled everything out and told me how depressed she was and all. I was shocked when she told me she was cutting herself. I nvr knew cause she would cut herself near her shoulders. (that explains why she nvr wears sleeveless clothes)

    Since then, we have both finished high school and are now in uni. We keep in contact by emails and msn. Recently, she has been having more problems again and she told me about them. She accidentally let slip that she was cutting herself again. ( I thought she had stopped) because I'm studying overseas, I feel so helpless! I can't do anything for her...


    Please advice!!
  • Apr 26, 2009, 12:50 PM
    mudweiser

    Tell her parents and/or a school guidance councilor or a teacher. An adult needs to intervene and give her the proper help.

    You may be scared that she might hate you for it, but it will be the best thing you will ever do for her.


    You could also give her these numbers for her to call, if she doesn't want to be there with her, call the number for her and stay there when she talks to them.

    Canada:
    1-800-DONT-CUT

    UK:
    0117-925-1119

    USA:
    1-800-273-TALK

    --Keep us posted.

    Sarah
  • Apr 26, 2009, 12:53 PM
    artlady

    Here is another link you may find useful in helping you to understand the dynamics of cutting and how to help your friend,if she does indeed want help.
    How Can I Stop Cutting?
  • Apr 26, 2009, 07:53 PM
    kotaro19

    Thanks guys.. The thing is, she is in malaysia and I'm currently in australia. I can't see her.

    I don't think she is cutting herself because she is contemplating suicide but I think its more like she feels that she should punish herself for some reason. Everything that happened was not her fault but she blames it all on herself.

    I can't tell her parents either. Her family is already having problems and if I were to tell them she'd probably stop telling me anything.
  • Apr 26, 2009, 08:02 PM
    mudweiser
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by kotaro19 View Post
    Thanks guys.. The thing is, she is in malaysia and i'm currently in australia. I can't see her.

    I dont think she is cutting herself because she is contemplating suicide but i think its more like she feels that she should punish herself for some reason. everything that happened was not her fault but she blames it all on herself.

    i can't tell her parents either. her family is already having problems and if i were to tell them she'd probably stop telling me anything.

    I know it's a tough position to be in but it is worth it. She'll thank you for it later.

    She may not be doing it now to kill herself but it's always best to call the hotline:

    Malaysia Suicide Hotlines

    Befrienders Malacca
    Peti Suraj No. PS245
    Pejalat Pos
    Besar Melaka
    75100
    MELAKA
    Contact by: Face to Face - Phone
    Hotline: (06) 284 2500

    Befrienders Penang
    104-1A Mewah Court
    Jalan Tan Sri Teh Ewe Lim
    11600
    PULAU PINANG
    Contact by: Face to Face - Phone - E-mail:
    Hotline: (04) 281 5161
    Hotline: (04) 281 1108
    Website: befpen.org
    E-mail Helpline: [email protected]
    Hours:
    Sat, Sun: 17:00 - 23:00

    The Befrienders Kuala Lumpur
    95 Jalan Templer
    Petaling Jaya
    46000
    SELANGOR DARUL EHSAN
    Contact by: Face to Face - Phone - Letter: - E-mail:
    Hotline: (03) 7956 8144
    Hotline: (03) 7956 8145
    Website: befrienders.org.my/
    E-mail Helpline: [email protected]
    Hours:
    Mon, Tues, Wed, Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun: 00:00 - 23:00

    Befrienders Ipoh
    Peti Surat 413
    Ipon
    30750
    PERAK
    Contact by: Face to Face - Phone
    Hotline: (05) 547 7933
    Hotline: (05) 547 7599

    Befrienders Seremban
    Seremban
    Contact by: - Phone
    Hotline: 06 7653588
    Hotline: 06 7653589
    Hours:
    Mon, Tues, Wed, Thurs, Fri: 19:00 - 22:00

    Lifeline Association of Malaysia
    71-2nd Floor, Jin Jejaka 2
    55100
    TMN MALURI
    Contact by: Face to Face - Phone
    Hotline: (063) 92850039
    Hotline: (063) 92850279
    Hotline: (063) 92850049

    Sarah
  • Apr 27, 2009, 10:14 AM
    liz28

    People that cut themselves mostly do it because they think it is a way to release the stress or pain their going through. It not always because their trying to kill themselves but some have died from bleeding to death because they cut themselve too deep.

    Your friend needs counseling and I can understand the situation your in but you can't help her because the two of you live in different places.

    Please tell a friend or family member so they can help her before it's too late.

    She needs counseling asap so they can help her stop doing this and address the issues she has. She might get mad at you at first but with time she will thank you. Please do something by telling someone.

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