I have become very good friends with a guy I worked with on the overnight shift during the re modeling of the store I work at. My husband and I have gone to partes at his place along with other people I know from work.(hubby used to work at the same store) We have been married 23 years, and I have never given him any reason to not trust me, but he has turned into what I call a green prickly husband. He is not only jealous of my guy friend, but he says the only reason he goes to the parties is because I need a designated driver at the end of the night. He has told me he feels really out of place at these parties, like he doesn't belong.
I don't want him to feel like this but I don't know what to do. The people that used to work with like him a lot. I don't know if it's the age difference or what. Most are are younger than both of us.
He finally admitted that he is not having any fun at these parties, and barely tolerates them. I am 52, and my husband is 58.
And, my guy friend(who is 43 by the way) has made it quit clear to my husband that he is not interested in me in that way at all. I know who he is interested in, and am trying to get them together:D
Need to address 1) the green prickly husband
2) his discomfort at parties

Can't you do some other things together as well as these parties? Perhaps if your hubby feels that you're having fun with him in other contexts he won't mind going to the parties.

Men often find it difficult if their female partners are good friends with other men. Your husband may see you laughing and having a fun time with this 'mate' of yours, and naturally he feels left out. I can understand that he's grumpy if he's feeling excluded.

You've been together along time, so it may be that things are a little stale. I'd suggest you may need to pay him a little more attention and gently bolster his ego (particularly when you're at the parties!). Sometimes we all just need to know that we are loved, admired and needed.

I was very uncomfortable at my husband's office parties, even though I knew most of them too.

I had nothing in common with any of them, their talk always revolved around established histories between them; they all knew about their families, work problems, kid problems etc. I would be polite and try, but of course, they already knew eveything they wanted to know about me, because they were friends with my husband.

I would sit there like a bump on a log waiting for the night to end.

My experience with work relationships is that they can get far too intimate about personal lives, and much more is shared other than the morning sales meeting numbers. Not saying this is a bad thing, but when all that effort spent at work getting to know people and being involved in lives on a personal level (such as you said trying to get a couple together), it becomes a social life in itself.

Your husbands jealousy may stem from the fact that you may be spending far more time with work mates and their lives, than you are with him. That you have a job going on with just one person, makes him insecure.

You aren't doing anything wrong. Your husband needs your time, and if you make an effort to show him he is the most important person in your life, his insecurity about your work and work mates will be less.

That he does feel this way is understandable. He isn't doing anything wrong either. He just needs more of you, and less of them in his life.

Give the guy a break, he isn't having the fun you are. I hope that's not the full extent of your social life. Maybe just having fun just the two of you could balance the work party blues.

Do you include him in the fun, or leave him to his own devices while your having fun??