So I am seeing/dating this guy for about four months. We hung out for a couple times, had dinner, watched movies, etc. In the beginning, he would text me everyday and call me at least once every other day even though he said he was busy to see how things are going for me. He liked me to keep his company when he is studying at home, so he would come over (the other end of town) to pick me up to hang out at his house when he is doing homework. I thought we had some great time together... emotionally and physically. Lately (2 weeks ago), he has been acting differently, he stopped texting and calling... though, he is still replying to my text/call/emails... It's just not the same anymore. I asked him what's wrong and he told me he has been busy. Last week, he suggested me to go over to his place again because he doesn't have school that day... then, the next morning he texted me and told me he needed to study and didn't have time to see me. So, it's like he kept on being hot and cold. He doesn't want me to accompany him during his homework time anymore. Ever since that day, we haven't talked... so last weekend, I decided to write him an email and told him I don't like to have this uncertain feeling about our "relationship"... and it took me almost a week to reply, all he wrote in the email was "I'm busy =) ttyl"

Is this the end of the story? What's going on?

He is busy so maybe you should do something with your time instead of worrying about him. No matter how busy he is if he wanted to see you he would make time for you. Time to find someone else and stop trying to get someone to spend time with you who obiviously doesn't.

Thank you for your reply, liz28. Yes, if he wanted to see me he would make time for me... But it seems like I can't get over the fact that he suddenly got busier or changed so quickly, and can't help thinking that I did something wrong or blew him off.

Last time when I was at his place, I was washing dishes and I took off my ring on the counter... He texted me and said "hey baby, you left your ring here" afterwards... If it is time to find someone else as you said, should I call him up and tell him that I just want my ring back from him? Last time I called when he changed his mind (he said he had to study) he said it wasn't a good idea and we're going to hang out later, so don't worry about it for now... and since he said he's "busy", I don't want to be annoying and keep on calling/texting/emailing

Should I reply to his "I'm busy, =) ttyl" email?

If I am going to move on, should I just end all the attachment and get my ring back from his place? When is the best time if he kept on saying he's busy? If I just force it and show up at his door, will things end ugly..

If the ring is of importance then get it back but it's obivious that this guy doesn't want to be bother because if he did, again, he would make time so this is just an excuse.

Thanks liz28, I accept the fact that he doesn't care about me after you pointed it out. If a person is really busy, he would still have a min to text me or call me when he misses me... if he is still interested, right?

How should I inform him about getting my ring back? Reply to his "i'm busy =) ttyl" email? Text him? Or what? I don't want him to misunderstand that I am finding an excuse to see him, last time on the phone, I told him I just wanted to DROP BY and get it back, but he replied "You want to come over to the other end of town to get it back? Just for it? It's not a good idea today, we'll hang out later. don't worry, we'll hang out..." Did it sound like he thought I was looking for an excuse?

How to do this and he won't think I'm weird to want it back in a hurry? If he still keep on saying that he is busy, what should I do??

Why not just send him a friendly email, asking him when it would be convenient for you to drive by and pick up your ring.

Or ask if it would be okay for him to drop it off to you, or leave it with a mutual friend so that you can pick it up without having to see him.

He may have brushed you off, but he admits to having the ring. I don't think he'd mind making arrangements for a quick five minute meeting to retrieve it.

Good luck.

Thanks Jake2008... I just sent him an email today after I read your message, and hopefully he'll write me back...

Like you said, if he likes you, he will find time to see you. If you really like this guy, why don't you wait until his exams are over and then see if he puts in more effort to see you.

It's possible that he's not doing well in school because you distracted him too much. So he needs to study alone. He might have a lot of pride and doesn't want to tell you that he's not doing well.

Oh... yes, he did mentioned that he is going to get busy this term but will find time to see me whenever he can(in the beginning)... But, I have been reading other people's Q&A on this site and thought that if he wasn't calling or texting me through out the day hints that he is not interested anymore, though, he replies all of my call/email/text... (I don't call or find him everyday though... because I wanted to give him space and time to do whatever he needs to get done.. )

Now, I'm confused.

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Originally Posted by annybaby84

oh... yes, he did mentioned that he is going to get busy this term but will find time to see me whenever he can(in the beginning)..... But, I have been reading other people's Q&A on this site and thought that if he wasn't calling or texting me through out the day hints that he is not interested anymore, though, he replies all of my call/email/text... (I don't call or find him everyday though....... because I wanted to give him space and time to do whatever he needs to get done..)

Now, I'm confused.

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Space is the best thing you can do right now, I think that's a really good idea, and that's what you are doing.

IF there is a chance at something, and you are not appearing to be hanging on his every word or action and analyzing it to death, HE may take a second look. If you appear to be needy or clingy or insecure, he'll likely opt for the books and studying. Play it cool, and in the meantime, keep busy and try not to worry so much about things you cannot possibly know the outcome of.

Not an easy spot to be in, but hang in there. Maybe like Annie said, he just really needs to study without any distractions.

You needs his space to study. You do sound really needy and sticky, but if it bothers you that much, you can just ask him if he's really busy with school and rather you leave him alone until he's done. You said it yourself, he answers your texts/emails/calls, so I'm sure he will provide you with an answer.

Communication is the key. But watch the line of needy and sticky.

If I were you, id just leave him to it... I no it can be hard asyou really like the lad but I have a lot of male friends and no how they are.. You need to play it cool from now on, if he wants to talk to you he has your number and email so he can defo get in touch if he wants! He won't be interested if your constantly ringing and texin asking wats wrong.. Men like a challenge you just need to keep him wanting more... Start by letting him come to you :)

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Originally Posted by JDRO696

If i were you, id just leave him to it... i no it can be hard asyou really like the lad but i have a lot of male friends n no how they are.. You need to play it cool from now on, if he wants to talk to you he has your number and email so he can defo get in touch if he wants! he wont be interested if your constantly ringing and texin askin wats wrong.. Men like a challenge you just need to keep him wantin more... Start by lettin him come to you :)

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This is just what I finally decided to do... He probably has some midterms this week and next week... Though he said I could go over and get my ring back this weekend, I think this might not a good idea if I was the reason why he wasn't doing very well last term...

I informed him why the ring is so important to me, so hopefully, he'll remember me one day, or I'll just have to wait for a couple more weeks when this term is over, if by then, he still shows no interest in me, I'll probably just get my ring back, and move on...

Need a new hobby to keep myself busy, focus more on school... =)