I have always wondered if cummin is the same thing as an orgasm because my boyfriend always asks did you cumm yet? Why would he ask if I have came yet if he hasn't heard me moan? When we do have sex I have an orgasm but I don't feel when I cumm? Like guyz know when their about to cumm but I don't know when I am. Like they can feel when there about to explode. Its also very hard for me to orgasm. Is this normal? Everyone makes sex out to be so good but I really don't think it is. Sometimes I don't even orgasm so I just fake my orgasms. What are some tricks to make me orgasm? Also what can I do to my boyfriend that he would really love?

I'm not sure what you are talking about, and also am not sure YOU know what you are talking about.

Describe the feelings you get when you "c u m."

Im wanting to know if c u m m I n g is the same thing as having an orgasm? If there not the same then I can feel when I orgasm but I can't feel when I'm c u m m I n g. When guys say I'm about to cumm obviously they could feel when their about to explode but I can't tell when I'm about to cumm. Im not even sure If I do cumm. I can't describe it if I'm not even sure if I'm c u m m I n g. Yes I get wet but I don't feel when/if I cumm

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Originally Posted by payasa14

Im wanting to know if c u m m i n g is the same thing as having an orgasm? If there not the same then I can feel when I orgasm but I can't feel when im c u m m i n g. When guys say im about to cumm obviously they could feel when their about to explode but I can't tell when im about to cumm. Im not even sure If I do cumm. I can't describe it if im not even sure if im c u m m i n g. Yes I get wet but I dont feel when/if i cumm

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Yes, I got all that. I asked you what feelings do you get when you c u m -- physical, emotional. (Even women getting raped get wet, so that's no indication.)

First this is first. You need to be relaxed to have an orgasm. You can always add clitoral stimulation or foreplay prior intercourse.

I don't think it's very nice of him to ask you that- that's putting pressure on you and pressure during sex is never okay.

I may be jumping to conclusions but that is how I see it.

Sarah

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Originally Posted by mudweiser

I may be jumping to conclusions but that is how I see it.

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I think the OP needs to first define orgasm in her own head.

I don't know how else to explain it to you. Okay first of all is c u m m I n g the same as having an orgasm?

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Originally Posted by payasa14

I dont know how else to explain it to you. okay first of all is c u m m i n g the same as having an orgasm?

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Yes, depending on how you define each. Does your vagina contract when you have an orgasm? Does your body become rigid for a short time?

Yes. It's the same thing. I believe in this context when your boyfriend asks you if you have , he means: did you orgasm? Keep in mind that you will not always be wet when you or orgasm, AND / or you may not make ANY noise at all when you orgasm. Not all women make a noise, or moan or scream. This lack of noise or body fluid is what throws men / boys off. They are looking for screaming and vaginal body fluid. You may not display either. Every person is completely different. Some men a LOT, others not so much, some men moan or pant, some close their eyes, or curl their toes, some hold their breath, or even open their mouths... it's different for EVERYONE. Some men even ejaculate prematurely, just momentarily BEFORE they orgasm. If he asks you: "did you ?" He's asking you if you experienced an orgasm. Just be honest. Either "yes" you did orgasm, or "no" you did NOT orgasm.

Don't be too freaked out or feel pressured by him. Some women "cream" a lot of vaginal fluid, either before, during or after intercourse. Other times, a woman might be a little bit wet or more dry. It varies. It is more likely that a woman will be better lubricated ("wet") if she is aroused mentally and physically. Penetration or intercourse doesn't automatically guarantee arousal at all. For some strange reason, Men are too often surprised by this fact.

If you're not experiencing an orgasm with your boyfriend, then you are probably not mentally stimulated or focused. He could be very fast and penetrating you too quickly, before you are "ready". It is very common for a male to become aroused in 2 seconds, vs. a female who make take anywhere between 20min. To 30 minutes to feel sexually stimulated!! You are not alone, and this is not an uncommon situation. The best thing to do, is to ask him nicely to cool his jets, and caress your back, or GENTLY kiss the nape of your neck, or QUIETLY whisper a compliment about you into your ear, or GENTLY stroke the upper back part of your thighs.. etc.etc. any errogenous zone on your body that you might consider a place that would feel pleasurable if stimulated properly. Actually - **I have a BETTER idea: ask your boyfriend nicely, if he would consider masturbating early on in the morning... (to take his edge off HIS URGENCY) then later that day... ask him to not focus on his errection, but rather focus on stroking and carressing your body very gently and patiently. Kissing and stroking are pleasant, if he's clean (smells nice) and he's gentle. Close your eyes and imagine something (anything else) that turns YOU on. You don't HAVE to necessarily focus on yourself and him in the moment... let your mind wander and focus on something that you've seen, heard, or felt in the past that turned you on or aroused you. If you can relax and focus on something else, and he's gentle and S - L - O - W you may have a better chance of achieving an orgasm or "".

Another thing... not ALL of your friends who TELL you that sex is GREAT are really telling you the truth. Sometimes girls lie, just to fit in. I'm sure some of them are having the same difficulty trying to orgasm. Really, you are not alone. This boyfriend may be too young and too fast to understand that your body doesn't respond the same way as his. As you get older, you'll know what works for you and what doesn't. Have you tried different positions? Like being on top? Go slow SLOW S L O W

Hang in there. And please use protection against STD's, pregnancy and aids.

I had trouble understanding the question so here's some facts:

C u m m I n g is slang for an orgasm

If you say you aren't sure if you have had an orgasm before then trust me YOU Haven't!

Orgasm through vaginal penetration alone is very difficult.

A lot of women can only orgasm through clitoral stimulation.

It is true that women have 'wet dreams' (I know from experience and it's a really strange feeling!)

How old are you? Seem like this is a young relationship and you are slighty confused.

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Originally Posted by Burd

how old are you? seem like this is a young relationship and ur slighty confused.

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Very good point.. please tell me the 14 after your name doesn't indicate your age...

Lol o now that's just my favorite number. No I'm 20. Okay now that I know c u m m I n g is the same thing I know I have. I just didn't know why he would ask me that if he didn't hear me moan or anything.

Your boyfriend might be asking you "did you yet" while the two of you are having sex because he doesn't want to get off without you getting off. Since you stated you don't give off any signs when your orgasming then this might be making it hard for him to understand if you came or if your about to .

If you want to know how to please him then the two of you need to sit down and talk about sex. Find out what he likes or doesn't or you can find out through exploring new techiques while the two of you are having sex.

You are trying to use a colloquialism to define a scientific word. However, C u m m I n g is the slang term for orgasm. SOME men think that this is the same as ejaculation, therefore they think? That for a woman to c u m it means they need to ejaculate-this is wrong.

I think your partner is trying to ascertain if you have climaxed (orgasmed) during sex-which judging by your response, the answer is "NO".

Tell your partner, This is not a crime, not his fault (mmm well, maybe not), etc. depending on how YOU feel about it.

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Originally Posted by payasa14

I dont know how else to explain it to you. okay first of all is c u m m i n g the same as having an orgasm?

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I think I know what you mean. Here's is what I can understand from your post. To me is like lubricating and getting wet while having sex. Orgasm is like squirting for me and my uterus contracts when I orgasm and reach my climate, which rearly happens and I have to fake it most of the times during sex. But when I masturbate I have multiple orgasms:D.

C U M = ORGASM

It's the same thing. Just 2 different ways to say it. I also don't believe you are educated about sex enough to be having sex at all.