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-   -   I attract people I'm not attracted to (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=342567)

  • Apr 16, 2009, 08:34 PM
    skull_nut
    I attract people I'm not attracted to
    I've had problems with dating and I've tried and tried but I usually fail thanks to my shyness and I've been working on this for some time

    All the girls I like don't like me or do like me but I've messed it up for myself
    I'm working on my self-esteem and whatever I can to learn how to get a successful relationship

    But here's the main problem,

    The girls I don't really like, The ones I treat as friends, are the ones that have an attraction to me. In one way I get it because treating a girl like a friend is a better start than treating them like a date, but I have that natural tendency to treat girls I don't like as friends and girls I do like as... I guess, just people I'm nervous around

    I don't know what to do,
    Should I try my friend tactics on girls I like or just build up my self-esteem and ask them on a date?
  • Apr 16, 2009, 09:12 PM
    makapuu
    I would suggest you start asking girls out. How else will you find out how and who to date?
  • Apr 17, 2009, 07:43 PM
    zurai

    I would like to say one thing at my school shy peoples are the ones that get all the good ones I'm outgoing to a fault and they always go for the quiet guy in the corner not the guys flirting with them in he middle of the room
  • Apr 17, 2009, 07:45 PM
    zurai
    I would try to use a friend tactic but I agree with maka get yourself esteem up and ask out girls first get them for all the good one are gone mon! Or you'll get left behind
  • Apr 19, 2009, 11:35 AM
    Fuzzball_Kara

    Girls do like it when you're willing to treat them like a friend. When they feel no pressure like that, then it makes the respect you more cause it gives them a friend who they can feel secure around knowing that this guy will always respect their boundries. Always think of girls as a respectable friend. Never think of them as someone you slobber over and want to touch and hug all over. Respect them, open doors.. you know. Just be a friend. Who knows... maybe that special someone will ask YOU out.
  • Apr 19, 2009, 02:56 PM
    I wish

    The only real way to gain confidence and courrage is to get more experience. Go out there and talk to more girls. Just remember to learn from your mistakes in the past.

    Maybe take some public speaking courses? Join a debating club?

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