Originally Posted by
DoulaLC
You are in a tough situation to be sure. You could encourage her friend who "knows" to keep trying to get through to her. Maybe giving her some information from online about the concerns of smoking while pregnant may help. Maybe it won't. Even with many adults, it is sometimes too easy to dismiss the baby simply because you can not see it. Sort of "out of sight, out of mind". That way they don't have to deal with the reality of what their actions may cause. With teens, it can be that way even more so....thinking nothing bad will happen to them.
You could say something to her, but she would likely only get angry at you and at the other friend for telling you. However, since she is a friend, you might give it a try coming from the point of really caring about her health, and knowing that she would obviously want to give her baby the best chance that she could.
It may be that she will only begin to really feel a need to make changes when she starts to show more, starts to feel the baby moving, and the reality of a baby is more obvious to her.
Since she plans on keeping the baby, appeal to her desire to be a good mother, even before the baby is born. I don't know how involved her parents are, but that could be another avenue to try. Also, maybe letting her know that as a young teen, she will be at even greater risk of potential problems, so doing all that she can to insure a healthy pregnancy and baby is going to be extra important and decrease the odds of her, the pregnancy, or the baby having any problems.
Even if she got angry, you will have helped to give her information that she just might think about later and hopefully take notice of. If approached from a loving and caring attitude, it may persuade her to actually listen and make some changes.
If she doesn't, there is not much you can do....no one can force her to make changes.