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Lately I've been thinking and I'm 13 almost 14 and I want to have sex. And I know the guy I want to have it with too, he's 16. Now don't give me any crap like oh he's too old or that could be rape or anything like that, I KnoW! But anyway I want to have sex and I want to get pregnant. Idk why I want to but I've been thinking about it lately and those are my thoughts. So should I or should I really reconsinder?.
Reconsider.
Reconsider, reconsider, a thousand times reconsider.
As far as the sex goes, I'm willing to bet that it is just your hormones. If you find a safer/easier alternative, possibly masturbation.
Also, if you want to push the boundary of statutatory rape, then you must not care about this guy very much.
As far as becoming pregnant, COMPLETELY hormones. Until you can physically, emotionally, and economically support a child alone, you are not ready to have one with another person. Children are so much harder than most people think that most teenage mothers (especially those under 16) don't raise their kids. It either goes to their mother, another family member with children, or adoption.
I know it's not what you want to hear, but you ARE NOT ready for that, and I'm sure that 99% of the people on these forums will agree with me.
Sure, why not, you're 13, you know everything, right?
I mean, how hard can it be to be a single mom at 13? Oh, you, single, trust me, that boy won't be sticking around.
You have a job right? You can get an apartment by yourself? You have enough money for food, clothes, diapers, bottles, a crib, stroller, car seat, medication, doctors appointments, etc, etc, etc. Oh, are you in the States? It costs around $12,000 to have a baby, you have that though, right?
Oh, you're not going on Welfare are you? Well, if you want this baby, don't you dare make us tax payers pay for it. Get a job. I know, you're only 13, no one will hire you, but I think most McDonalds will, you can make it a career, who knows, you could be a manager by the time you're 40, making a bit over minimum wage. That's cool!
In other words, I don't think you've thought this through, I also think that you're just on spring break, bored and want to shock some people. If this is real, then you don't have the sense God gave a goat.
Good luck.
Seriously? You want to have a baby because you're almost 14? And you think it'd be fun I'm guessing.
You obviously have no idea what it takes to raise a child. Sure they're cute and smell good but they are a whole lot of work and selfless giving. Their needs will always come before yours.
Who do you think will take care of this baby? You're not capable because you don't even take care of yourself yet. So the responsibility gets thrown off to everyone else; your parents, neighbors or whoever you get to babysit for you and the rest of us who waited to have children. So are you telling me you expect me to take care of my child and yours too? That's pretty unbelievable that you have the nerve to think that's a good idea.
And why do you want a child?- Oh yeah, you said, "IDK"- THAT'S NOT A REAL ANSWER! A baby is a little person and they're not so cute when they're up to feed at 3 am, or when they're sick and screaming, or they scream for no apparent reason (and they will). I know some adults that shouldn't have kids much less a hormonal teenager.
Not only is this situation idiotic and not logical, it's SELFISH. It's selfish to bring a child into the world when you don't have the capacity (mental, physical, or financial) to care for him/her properly. This is as foolish as the people that breed dogs in their living room because they think the puppies will be cute; never concerned about the aftermath. What makes you think you are qualified to be a mother? What, because you got your period? If so then your common sense must've leaked out with last month's cycle.
Do not give you crap. Yes, I am going to give you crap. Just like I should and everybody else should. He is too old. You are too young. Your immature. Sorry but just because you want to do something does not mean you should. Those may be your thoughts but your actions if you went through with it will screw a lot of people. Especially the innocent child that will be brought into this world. Dinkle dorf.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lama22
So, lets get this straight here. You are "almost" 14. You "know this guy that you want to have IT with too!" Do you know that this guy that "you know" could be charged with a sexual offense? Do you know it could ruin the REST OF HIS LIFE?. not to mention yours! Are you really that selfish? Yes... YOU ARE. At your age, you have NO idea of the consequences here. Not ONE clue how many lives will ruin, if you make this your decision.
Let's talk about having sex with this boy first. How long have you known him? I'm guessing a few months. What is it that you "know" about him? Is he a virgin? I'm doubting this, unless you are planning to trap and seduce a virgin, and lie to him about using protection. You have no right to do this to him and ruin his life in this way. What about STD's if he isn't a virgin? Do you think it "just won't happen to you?" Are you the special one? No, you are NOT! You have NO clue what you are getting into here! Not one clue!
But lets say that none of that happens. Let's say that you both agree to have a baby. Well, how are either of you going to support this baby? Who is going to watch this baby when you are in school or doing homework? You are in school right? What happens when you have the baby? Who pays for it? You can't. This 16 yr. old boy can't. So who then? WE DO!
But!. here's the kicker! We, the taxpayers, have to pay for other things too! So you are going to get the bare minimum! See, you don't even PAY taxes yet, so you don't understand how this works! Do you even know about taxes and where they go? Money does just not appear out of nowhere, and even if you get a check in the mail and think it does, it will not be nearly enough for you to support yourself and a baby. Trust me, your baby's daddy will NOT stick around. He will run faster than you could chase him... or he'll be locked up! You won't get a dime from him, and IF you do, you baby will be a teenager by the time you get it!
Okay, now that we've got that out of the way a little, back to who is going to look after this babies needs? Who is going to have to wake up every hr. at night to care for him/her? You are going to have to breast feed for years, because I doubt you will be able to afford formula on top of your other expenses, that you have no money for to begin with. How are you going to go to school and get a good education in order to raise this baby, when you are up all night with a sick or screaming baby? Your baby will not sleep through the night. Your baby will need 24/7 care! How will you do that and go to school?
Look, right now you are thinking a baby would just be so cute. Or if you had a baby with this "boy" that you might be able to keep him and you would be one happy family. You are 110% wrong! No way... no how... not going to happen. It just WON'T! You don't understand this yet, but you will when you are older.
Your brain has not yet fully developed. That is not an insult, that is a FACT. If you look at a brain scan of a 14 yr old, all of your neurotransmitters that connect to your brain, are just not all fully attached yet. Your brain isn't fully developed until you are into your 20's. What this means is that you do not have the ability at 14 yrs. Of age, to look ahead and make informed choices. You really can't see around corners! You are living in the here and now, and even next week seems a lifetime away if you have something planned, that you just can't wait for.
You are not ready for this! Talk to someone you are close to, or maybe your school counselor, and come up with a better plan for your life. No boy is going to want to date you once this boy leaves, or take you to the senior prom, with a baby on your arms.
Just because you can jump off a bridge, doesn't mean that you should jump off a bridge.
Just because you can sing karaoke at your friend's birthday party, doesn't mean that you should try out for American Idol.
Just because you know how to drive a car, doesn't mean that it's legal.
Just because you can smoke, doesn't mean that you should.
Just because you can have a baby, doesn't mean that you should have a baby.
You're not old enough to take care of the baby by yourself. Period. Therefore, you should not have sex. Because hon, sex = baby.
You're not ready for the midnight feedings, the hundreds of dirty diapers, the thousands of dollars in food, clothes, and diapers, the aches and pains, the labor, the hormones, the responsibility, the commitment, the human life depending on you for its very survival.
That's some plan you have for your life there,by the way,once that baby goes in,it has to come out! And it hurts like hell!
Did you get the reaction you wanted?
What you have read is all good advice,you may not like it.. tough.
Your 13.be 13. Get a pup,on seconds thoughts scrap that idea. Get a doll.
... You are really, really dumb, the kind of dumb that teenage boys just love to take advantage of. And if he's willing to become a sex-offender because he slept with a girl under the age of consent, then he's dumb too.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lama22
Hope life works out for you.
God u all seriously think wayyyy took much. And no my spring break starts tomorrow so scratch that idea! I. Come to this website to share my feeling and what I want help with all u don't need to be biotches about it! My lord!
You're 13! Yes, we need to be "biotches" about it because obviously that's what you need!Quote:
Originally Posted by Lama22
You are a child, no matter what you think or believe, you're a child. There is no way that you can handle having a baby, no matter what you think and believe.
Really, there's nothing we can say, you'll do whatever it is you want to do. In fact, if you're a true 13 year old, you'll probably do it out of spite now!
But, when you're sitting at home night after night with a colicky baby, no money, no boyfriend, no parents and wondering where you went wrong, well, it's be because you didn't listen.
You don't have to like the advice, the truth hurts, but you do need to hear it.
I don't regret one single thing I said to you. Now the ball is in your court. Either you decide to listen to people who've been there, done that, or you do what you want and suffer the consequences. Believe me, you will suffer, forever! But whatever right? You're young, you think you know it all, so much smarter then the adults in your life. Well, just fyi, I was 13 once too, so maybe you should listen, because I lived through it!
We're being cruel because we want you to listen. Kindness doesn't work, that's what we've learned! Now it's your turn to learn. Hopefully you'll listen.
If this wouldn't ruin at least 3 lives I would almost like to say go ahead. And 3 years from now when you are a welfare mom tearing your hair out because all your friends are having fun while you are burdened with the car of your baby you can come back here and tell others to not be as dumb as you are being.
But the fact is, you will be ruining your life, the father's and the baby's. You will also have an adverse affect on the grandparents as well. And, of course, you will be a drain on the state as you and your baby have to be supported.
What a great idea! Now you can stay up late!
Babies born in the U.S. to teenage mothers are at risk for long-term problems in many major areas of life, including school failure, poverty, and physical or mental illness. The teenage mothers themselves are also at risk for these problems.
Teenage pregnancy is usually a crisis for the pregnant girl and her family. Common reactions include anger, guilt, and denial. If the father is young and involved, similar reactions can occur in his family.
Adolescents who become pregnant may not seek proper medical care during their pregnancy, leading to an increased risk for medical complications. Pregnant teenagers require special understanding, medical care, and education--particularly about nutrition, infections, substance abuse, and complications of pregnancy. They also need to learn that using tobacco, alcohol, and other drugs, can damage the developing fetus. All pregnant teenagers should have medical care beginning early in their pregnancy.
Pregnant teens can have many different emotional reactions:
* some may not want their babies
* some may want them for idealized and unrealistic ways
* others may view the creation of a child as an achievement and not recognize the serious responsibilities
* some may keep a child to please another family member
* some may want a baby to have someone to love, but not recognize the amount of care the baby needs
* depression is also common among pregnant teens
* many do not anticipate that their adorable baby can also be demanding and sometimes irritating
* some become overwhelmed by guilt, anxiety, and fears about the future
* depression is also common among pregnant teens
Babies born to teenagers are at risk for neglect and abuse because their young mothers are uncertain about their roles and may be frustrated by the constant demands of care taking. Adult parents can help prevent teenage pregnancy through open communication and by providing guidance to their children about sexuality, contraception, and the risks and responsibilities of intimate relationships and pregnancy. Some teenage girls drop out of school to have their babies and don't return. In this way, pregnant teens lose the opportunity to learn skills necessary for employment and self-survival as adults.
DO YOU REALLY WANT THIS?
ooh boy I wish your momma would read this
Sarah
RECONSIDER
and it has nothing to do with your age
it has to do with the fact that you can get pregnant and when you do how the hell will you take care of the baby... think about it's a living person not a cute accesory
and trust me this guy won't help with the baby
JUST Don't DO IT!
=D
OK I'm also 13 and I also have a 16 year old boyfriend I mean I have though about making a baby with him but I though about it and I agree with everyone else... ITS A BAD IDEA! But I understand..
About the sex thing... umm the only advice I have for you is:
1. Get on birth control and have him wear protection
2.umm how long have you been with him... at least wait for 3 or 4 months
And three WATCH OUT... im sorry for saying this but he's 16 of corse he's going to want sex just see if he really cares first...
K... well I hope I helped!
Quote:
Originally Posted by morshep95
Omg you thanks! Someone who at least understands and doesn't just think they know everything because they've been 13 before and think they know it all. Because maybe they aren't going through what we r. So you thanks!
Sounds like the Blind leading the Blind.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lama22
We're not going through what you're going through; we've been through what you're going through.
Look, we're trying to educate you on what you'd be getting yourself into. I know what it's like to take care of a baby and it's not easy. I'm done with school, I own my own home, and have a pretty decent job... and guess what- it's still a struggle to make ends meet.
Daycare, diapers, formula, clothes, shoes, pediatrician visits, medicines, missed days from work; it's not easy. You're not mentally capable of see the long-term effects of what you do today.
I have to ask a question, what makes you want a baby? And don't say "IDK", you want to make an adult decision to have sex, then you should be able to express your feelings.
K, did you know that no form of birth control is 100% effective, so, if you're having sex you could get pregnant, not matter how careful you are.Quote:
Originally Posted by morshep95
Also, this is disturbingis that what constitutes a long term relationship nowadays. Wow!Quote:
... at least wait for 3 or 4 months
The future isn't looking very good. :(
You know what, I've reconsidered.
Think about it everyone. If all the teens did smart stuff and listened, places like McDonalds would close down. The world will always need burger flippers.
I'm looking into the furture of these two teens, and I see a hamburger patty!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahah I can just keep laughing! Damn, I'm so glad I took the advice of you guys about getting a dog for my boyfriend,
By the way alty she's doing amazing and she's sooo big and she lovesssssss the park (we take her every sunday) and she loves fetching and she's super well trained OK sorry I got off topic but anyhow
Listen Lama22, you are nobody to come over here and call these people biotches first they are ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL older than you and they are ALLLLLL right and you are SO SO SO wrong honey. You are 13, go get some sex education and such, you need to focus in school, what you need is a slap in the face you kind of remind of this girl...
YouTube - Maury Show - 15 Year Old has had sex OVER 300 Times!!
You want to be like that?
Where are your parents here cause if this is how they raised you to be then honey you have no education at all!
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