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-   -   Living nextdoor to brendan! (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=337680)

  • Apr 4, 2009, 06:54 AM
    redhed35
    Living nextdoor to brendan!
    Hello.. ive been living next door to brendan for over a year,lately we have been spending a lot of time together,the relationship has changed from neighbours,to friends to something else.. we have never kissed.. I fancy him.. I know he fancies me.. why the hell won't he ask me out?

    I can't ask him.. im old school.. HE should ask ME!

    Should I just let it go and move on?
  • Apr 4, 2009, 08:19 AM
    liz28

    All because your old school your going let a chance him slip through your fingers?

    This is a new day and age so instead of waiting for him to make his move, you should step up to the plate and make one.

    Swallow your pride and asked. It isn't hard!

    I was the one that asked my fiancé out and I am pretty sure that if I didn't, we wouldn't be together let alone be getting married.

    In closing take a change and ask him.
  • Apr 4, 2009, 08:41 AM
    roxypox

    Yeah you really should take a chance and ask him out, like Liz said this is a new day and age.

    If you sit around and wait for him to make a move, you might very well loose the chance of a date all together. If we don't venture... we will never gain...

    Best of luck to you! Tell us how it goes once you've asked him out ;)

    Roxy
  • Apr 4, 2009, 09:13 AM
    JBeaucaire

    I don't think it's "risky" to ask a guy out, or simply let him know you're open to him asking you out. It's not risky AT ALL based on the sideways logic in the original question, noted here:
    Quote:

    i can't ask him.. im old school.. HE should ask ME!

    should i just let it go and move on?
    Based on this, she would rather move on than ask him out, meaning if he never does, they won't ever even try.

    So, what is "risked" if she gets over the pointless inhibition and just tells him? If he passes, she hasn't lost anything, since she planned to "move on" anyway.

    My dad always said, "If you don't ask, then the answers already 'no', so ask anyway. If they say 'no', nothing's changed."

    Think about it.

    Shyness is cute when you're dating someone, it is something to be overcome and ignored when you're meeting and initiating stuff with others. In that case, shyness causes you to lose out, don't let that happen.

    Either ask him out, or at least let him know you're looking forward to doing something with him some time, indicating you're waiting for him to ask you out.
  • Apr 4, 2009, 09:34 AM
    talaniman

    You may be old school, but what if he is NEW school? How old are you??

    Honestly, I would be wary of getting anything started with someone that close. I imagine he has similar concerns.

    Either take a risk, or leave it alone.
  • Apr 6, 2009, 09:58 AM
    redhed35

    Brendan and redhed35 up a tree.k.i.s.s.i.n.g!

    I bit the bullet and asked the lovely brendan out..

    He said yes.. thanks for the push guys!
  • Apr 6, 2009, 10:09 AM
    I wish
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by redhed35 View Post
    brendan and redhed35 up a tree.k.i.s.s.i.n.g!

    i bit the bullet and asked the lovely brendan out..

    he said yes.. thanks for the push guys!

    Good thing I continued reading all the posts and saw that you went for it.

    I was wondering how many great guys were slipped away because girls used the old school approach. How badly would you feel if another girl asked him out first? Luckly we don't have to worry about that now!

    Good for you for not letting him slip away!
  • Apr 6, 2009, 10:42 AM
    starlite1

    Good for you, Redhead! Keep us posted!
  • Apr 6, 2009, 11:30 AM
    Romefalls19

    Congrats Red, keep us posted on how things go! We love to hear good stories, most on here are quite dreadful.
  • Apr 6, 2009, 12:49 PM
    roxypox
    Hey! Good for you ;) (Ps. ;) I'm glad you bit the bullet ; you ventured, you gained. :) I'm happy for you!
  • Apr 6, 2009, 01:00 PM
    redhed35

    Phew! Thought id lost my mojo there..

    Heads up.. brendan just sent a text..
  • Apr 11, 2009, 01:41 PM
    redhed35

    I supposed to be on a date! But I'm here all dolled up and no brendan.

    What the hell?

    He was supposed to pick me up at 9,its 20 to 10,where the hell is he??
  • Apr 11, 2009, 02:54 PM
    liz28

    Did you call him? I hope everything works out and you don' get stood up by a neighbor. And I hope he has a reasonable excuse.
  • Apr 11, 2009, 02:57 PM
    Alty

    Don't give up, men are never on time.

    ::hiding, hiding, hiding:: The guys are going to smack me for that. ;)
  • Apr 11, 2009, 06:11 PM
    redhed35

    Brendan called,we went out,his excuse was valid and reasonable,although I was 'officially 'pissed off.

    He was the perfect gentleman,I have a pain in my jaws from laughing,he walked me to the door and kissed (so so tender) we said goodnight and have plans for the cinema on Tuesday.

    Thank you all for giving me the push to ask him out.
  • Apr 11, 2009, 06:52 PM
    Alty
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by redhed35 View Post
    brendan called,we went out,his excuse was valid and reasonable,although i was 'officially 'pissed off.

    he was the perfect gentleman,i have a pain in my jaws from laughing,he walked me to the door and kissed (so so tender) we said goodnight and have plans for the cinema on tuesday.

    thankyou all for giving me the push to ask him out.

    Awww, that sounds great.

    Oh to be in the wonderful beginning of a relationship, such a wonderful time.

    Enjoy every minute, have fun, be yourself and keep us posted. I'm living vicariously through you now! ;)
  • Apr 24, 2009, 05:29 AM
    redhed35

    Everything going well with brendan and me,no disasters to report!

    Its his birthday tomorrow,and since we have been going out a very short time,what would be a suitable gift?

    He likes fishing, dogs,music,books and is redorating his house.. but I don't want to get something that screams.. 'brendan I want to have your babies'!

    Ideas so far have been,a t-shirt.
    A c.d.
  • Apr 24, 2009, 06:00 AM
    starlite1

    Hi Red,

    How about you taking him out to dinner, and buying him something for his house that is personal to him? What room(s) is he redecorating? And what are his tastes? Perhaps dinner and a gift certificate to a home store?
  • Apr 24, 2009, 06:16 AM
    redhed35

    Hey starlite,dinner sounds good,he was bringing me out anyway,last Sunday we went furniture shopping for his lounge,I did think about a picture he liked but he thought was too expensive..

    I do have a day voucher for an adventure centre.. hmmm.. that might be fun.. take him off for the day,what do you think?
  • Apr 24, 2009, 06:40 AM
    liz28

    Redhead that sounds like a good plan to me. If you get him a car get a funny one. Hallmark got some good ones.

    I am glad things are working out.

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