Hi everyone

How do you know what you want to do with your life?

I'm asking because my job bores me but I have no idea what I'd rather do. I'm 23 and haven't been working long, but I'm feeling like I'm very old to be working this out.

Because I didn't know what to do I started looking for jobs in administration, because I knew I'd be able to do that, and work in the charitable sector because I thought that working for an organisation that did good would be more fulfilling and interesting than any other job, but I'm bored, I don't click with my co-workers (although they're perfectly nice), and sometimes at work I just feel this pressure in my chest and I just want to scream.

However, I can't leave unless I know what I want to do, and I also can't leave unless something else is lined up, because we're in a recession and I'm lucky to have a job at all. This makes me even more stressed, because by the time the recession is over/I work out what to do I'll be even older.

I know this is a perfectly run of the mill problem for a lot of teenagers and college students, and may be I'm a bit old for this, but I am thinking about this a lot and would appreciate some opinions.

How many people like their jobs?

How did you decide what to do?

Is it better to stay in a job you hate for stability or leave and try something else even if you're not sure what that is, or how it will work out?

Im 37 and I don't know what I want to do with my life. I like what I do, but I don't know that there isn't something I would rather do.

I would advise, however, if you want to make drastic changes, do it while your young and have relatively less responsibilities (like 2 kids)

May I suggest that you sit down and write all the things that you like, it can be hobbies, crafts, talking to people, parties, almost anything.

After you have this list completed (work on it for about a week or so), then categorize it in 'headings.' Then for the next week or so, simply write down under each item how many things that you can think of that would possibly be a career, actually doing something that you like. You may be surprised, there could be hundreds of ideas...

I have changed careers many times over the years but mostly stayed in sales / management. The 3 companies that I own now, I started when I was 47 years old. We gross over 6.5 million dollars / year. I found something that I enjoy doing, I haven't really "worked" for manu years now... hehhehe. Kidding, but it is fun now.

I hope that this helped, please let me know.

Stringer

Hi, AngelaCarterFan!

Excellent suggestions, Stringer!

I too, have changed careers a number of times in my life. I taught for a long time to all different ages in fine art types of courses, perform music as a professional musician, do handyman types of work like painting, etc. have been involved as a leader of music in churches for over 36 years, sold portrait products for an international company, had been a custodian for a number of years, have been teaching private vocal and instrumental music lessons since 1978, work as a volunteer, direct a male singing group that is a chapter of the largest male singing organization in the world, tune and repair pianos, refinish furniture and brass, build folk music instruments, reupholster furniture, been a sales person for flooring and home décor...

I'm not trying to brag, but the point that I'm trying to make, is that a person doesn't have to do just one thing for a career and also might change careers many times in their life. Many types of careers can be done simultaneously that also might, in many ways, be related to each other, in occupation as well as field.

I'm the kind of person who likes to work with my hands and always be busy with something. I know that's not the kind of life for everyone though. I really like variety in my life and enjoy being around people. Even during those times in my life, so far, that I've been employed by someone, I always try to find other ways to occupy my time to make additional money and to help others in some way.

In answer to the questions at the bottom of your post, I submit the following. What I've stated so far in this post should answer your first question that you had.

I've liked doing nearly everything that I've done in order to make a living for myself.

I decided and do decide what I like to do because of being interested in a number of things that I know that I have the skills to do, or that I know that I can develop the skills to do them.

Sometimes, a person might need to stay in a job they don't like, for stability of income. However, a person can always work to make the "grass greener where they are" and also explore and do other things on the side that might turn into full-time careers for them.

I've made use of what I've learned in college and also gone beyond that.

I hope that this has been helpful to you!

Thanks!

Thanks for your input.

Steve, you're right - as panicky as I am about being too old to be having this problem, I'm still the youngest and least encumbered I'm going to be for the rest of my life.

Stringer - Thank you! It's nice to have something practical to focus on, and I'm already thinking of things for my list. My only concern at present is that I am kind of frightened to make a change because I know I'm lucky to be in employment at all in the current economic climate, and walking away from a paying job in a recession is just silly, but I can take advantage of this time to earn a little money and get some experience whilst working out alternate plans.

It's also nice to hear that some people actually like their jobs - so many people around me seem to resent their jobs and wish they were somewhere else, and I was starting the think that my feelings were the norm, and I was being silly to hope for more out of a job.

Clough - Thanks! I think part of the reason I was panicking about this was because I got this sudden vision of myself in this job for the rest of my life and freaked out, but just because this is where I am now doesn't mean it's where I'm always going to be. I could have several completely different careers ahead of me, or I could find something tomorrow that I loved so much I could dedicate the rest of my life to it. I've got to stop thinking of this as 'my life - FOR EVER' and just see it as a part of a chapter of my life. Take what I can from it (emotionally, financially and in terms of experience), whilst staying open to change, and looking for other things that I may enjoy doing (following the advice from Stringer). Now that I've started thinking about it there are some avenues worth exploring, but I am cautious.


I don't know how the press are handling the recession in the US but here in England it's a tad apocalyptic, particularly in regard to people without much experience (apparently new or recent graduates are virtually unemployable except in McDonalds), so the idea of sampling different things or moving on from where I am now frightens me. Work satisfaction aside, I appreciate that I should be grateful to be getting paid at all.

But I can definitely devote this time to exploring more about who I am, and look into getting in some training/volunteering/work 'on the side.'

Thanks again.

Hi again, AngelaCarterFan!

What sort of education, skills, training, job experience and interests do you already have, please?

Perhaps we can do some "brain storming" here for possibilities that you can explore for earning a living for yourself.

Thanks!

Hi Clough,

Good idea, I think you'll regret it when you see all I've written though;

I'm from the UK and my qualifications probably won't mean anything to people outside of England, so I won't be specific, but I graduated with an average mark of A- (best in humanities and social sciences). I did a BA (Hons) degree in literature, also averaging an A-, and I have what I guess are intermediate qualifications in IT (MS Office, basics like that).

I've worked/volunteered mainly in the charitable sector, but in no one field for any length of time, and have done a lot of part time/temp jobs to get experience and work out what I like/am good at.

I've been a teachers aide, a shop assistant, a receptionist, an administrator in HR and Accounts, worked customer service for insurance firm, done basic database work, and worked in fundraising, PR and communications.

I'm good with sensible, logical stuff like databases and administrative work, and whilst I do understand why people find that sort of stuff comforting in it's repetitiveness, but after a while I get rather frustrated with it.

I am quite quiet but I work well with people (I'm calm and good at calming people down), and I like helping people. It's the reason why I focused on the charitable sector in the first place - so I could feel like I was helping the community. I also really like writing, and in one volunteering role I wrote and designed all of the charity's posters, leaflets and press materials. I like writing creatively as well.

I like to work in quite busy and lively environments.

As I said, I chose to work in the charitable sector in the first place because I wanted to help people, but have discovered that charities are businesses like anything else, so even though what you're doing is technically helpful, you end up doing exactly the sort of work you'd do in any other sector, but for slightly less money. It's nice to do something useful, but that doesn't stop it from being boring. I've realised that whilst I want to help others, I also want to help myself, and be stimulated and challenged by what I do, so I'm thinking that in the long term I should choose my job selfishly and volunteer in my free time, rather than by trying to combine them by working for a charity.

It's been suggested that I'd be a good teacher or counsellor/therapist, but I don't think I'm tough enough to be a teacher (no offense children), and, aside from needing to deal with my own issues, I don't think I'd be good as a therapist as I think I would become too upset by others problems.

From thinking about this I realise that I would like to do something more creative and varied, such as writing, or working in the media, but have been taking the safe route by sticking with more stable, 9 to 5 jobs. I also have an impression (maybe an unfair one), that in order to work in the media you need to be very competitive and ruthless, and I am neither of those things, nor do I wish to be.

However, I think that nurturing my love of writing would be a start, and am looking into how I could do that.

Sorry for the length of the post, but at least you know you can trust me when I say I've put some thought into this! Any input you have would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks