Back in October I had to take in my mom's 7yr old American Toy Terrier. He had the run of the house and slept on my mom's lap at night.(In a lift chair because she has Parkinson's disease). He also got into the habit of going to the bathroom in the house because my mom couldn't get him out fast enough.

Since coming to live with me I have to keep him confined during the day (on a leash in the kitchen) because he marks his territory and has bitten 2 of my kids when he has been surprised. I do not want to give him up because I take him to the nursing home to see my mom. He is the bright spot in her life.

When I crate him at night he whines yips and barks. I have tried several different ways and after 2-3 weeks of things going fine he will start the whining allover again. I don't want to hit him and hurt him so I have used a fly swatter to smack him and say "no". It worked last time but now he is starting again. I am now thinking about sedatives. My family needs sleep!

First, he misses his owner (your mother).

Second, it sounds like he's tied in the kitchen all day and kenneled all night. Is he getting exercise, time outside?

I have also never hit a dog - with my hand or with an object. I find this rather shocking, quite frankly.

It's a bit unfair to expect a dog that has spent its entire life sleeping in the house with a human companion to then be locked up in a crate. He's sad and wants to get out and be with someone. You may be able to train him eventually but it will take a while. Do not give sedatives to an old dog.

I am trying the best I can to give to give my mom's dog a good home. We are working on training him. However I cannot let him mark his territory all over my house like he was allowed to do while my mom was sick. I also cannot let him bite the children I watch which has happened twice. I also understand he misses my mother! I have started using water mist instead of the fly swatter which I was not beating him with. Believe it or not I do love the dog and my mother that is why I am trying all that I can.

I wasn't having a go at you, it is good that you have taken the dog on and not taken it to a shelter but you do have to understand that 7 years of being spoilt will take a long time to undo :)

Has he been neutered? If he hasn't you might want to consider having this done. It may help tone down the marking and aggression. While your heart is in the right place it's not fair to ask the dog to be confined all day. Perhaps you could invest in a muzzle and if need be a male doggy diaper to help with the other problems so that he can have more freedom. Also what brings about the biting? Is there any specific trigger? You also need to try and train and socialize him with the family, and while he may not enjoy a muzzle it may be the safest way to give him the freedom and socialization he needs.

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Originally Posted by Tippytoo

I am trying the best I can to give to give my mom's dog a good home. We are working on training him. However I cannot let him mark his territory all over my house like he was allowed to do while my mom was sick. I also cannot let him bite the children I watch which has happened twice. I also understand he misses my mother! I have started using water mist instead of the fly swatter which I was not beating him with. Beleive it or not I do love the dog and my mother that is why I am trying all that I can.

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I understand and I understand the dog is lost and confused and you are frustrated - I've had rescue dogs with serious problems and the problems seem to go on and on and on. That being said it's the hitting thing that disturbed me.

Something inside me cringes when I see a dog get hit.

And as far as the biting - that is a serious concern. I have seen some very bad dog bites and big financial settlements when there was advance notice that the dog would/could/might bite.

My larger dog (130#) is EXTREMELY protective of me and I know how difficult it is to have my eyes on her all the time. She doesn't challenge anyone and is on the almost timid, laid back side - but if push would ever come to shove there would be a problem.

I don't know if this would work for you - and I've posted it before - but I bought one of those dog playpens that unfolds into a great big circle and when my dogs were puppies I put their kennel inside the playpen and set the playpen up in the kitchen. Puppy wasn't confined to the kennel, could go in and out of the kennel, could roam around inside the pen. The dog I mentioned above stopped crying at night once she had the playpen. Would something like that work for you?

I still use the pen if I have someone working at the house because I can very effectively and easily block off one side of a room so the workmen can be "here" and my dogs can be "there."

My husband died in 2007 and I had a lot of problems with my one dog adjusting - she eventually did but it takes time and patience (a lot of both).

Thank You for your helpful ideas. Yes the dog has been neutered. The bites occurred when the children surprised him while he was sleeping so I now keep the kitchen off limits except for when the kids are sitting at the table.

I have thought about a muzzle and have plans to talk with a vet tech about this option so he can be free during the day. I put him outside when the weather is good, but he gets cold very easily and I live in NY. I also cannot let him loose outside because he is a runner.( I have a large fenced yard but he is so small he can get under the gates and the fencing.

The playpen idea may work but I still think he will whine at night. At this point I am game to try anything because I do want the dog to have a good life.

Thank You again.

Is putting the playpen close to your sleeping area an option? One of my dogs was always okay if she could see or hear me - but I didn't want her keeping me up all night.

Sounds like you are doing all you can (and, yes, older dogs and children are not necessarily a good mix).

On another note - how is your mother? When my husband was in the hospital he DESPERATELY wanted to see "his" dog but they wouldn't allow me to bring her in. Of course, that was a hospital, not a nursing home, but I do think it would have both cheered him up and reassured him. As it was he asked me to make very few promises - one of them was to ALWAYS take care of his dog (which, of course, I would have done, promise or no promise).

This might sound a bit out of line but how old are your children? You could try telling them to just be careful around the dog if it only bites when they surprise it, some dogs just don't like kids in their face when they wake up.

I do have him in the bathroom off my bedoom with a nightlight. I have even tried playing music for him so there is some noise because my mom always had the TV on. Some nights it seemed to work and others not so much.

My mom unfortunately is confined to a wheelchair with limited movement in her right arm. She was a very active woman, this disease has been torture for her. ( and the family to see her go through this that is why I am trying to keep my sanity and the dog). She loves seeing the dog and is always telling me that she is so happy that I took the dog in. I know she misses him terribly but it does cheer her to see him when I go to see her everyweekend. ( she lives in a different city)

As for the kids, Unfortuantely they are kids I watch (daycare) so I can't let him bite them. They are all under the age of 5. Some are too young to understand and 1 has special needs.

I looked up about this breed and unfortunately they do not recommend this dog for children under 14. They also say they are extremely intelligent and will test the limits to get what they want.

Also, another piece of info. My mom got this dog after my dad passed away in 2004. He was a stray that was found wandering. The animal shelter was not sure for how long and could only estimate his age at 3-4 years.

So I know he has a long history of doing what he wants and that I have a long uphill battle.

YOU HIT YOUR MOTHERS DOG WITH A FLYSWATTER? This dog that was your mothers joy, the dog she cared for after your father passed away, and you are now abusing him because of a situation he was forced into? He was yanked away from his mama, he was thrown into a strange house with a bunch of children that he isn't used to. He is TIED UP in the house?

Love your mother enough to take care of her baby, and let her dog have a life! Find a home that actually understands and will care for her the way a loving dog should be cared for. If the new family is kind enough, they will let you come and get your mothers pride and joy, to take him to the nursing home to visit her, as he so obviously misses her. These are just not animals you know. They miss people, they miss their homes, they mourn, they have HEARTS!

I'm sure your mother would just be heartsick to know the way you are abusing this dog! Yes... abusing! This is animal cruelty! Shame on you!

OK Shame on me on me! I didn't beat him. It was a smack like with newspaper.

And if you read any of the other entries, I am trying to make his life a good one.

Maybe you should offer some helpful suggestions instead!

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Originally Posted by Tippytoo

OK Shame on me on me! I didn't beat him. It was a smack like with newspaper.

And if you read any of the other entries, I am trying to make his life a good one.

Maybe you should offer some helpful suggestions instead!

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I'm not defending anyone - Starbuck really knows her stuff. My feeling is that this was a knee jerk reaction because there have been so many people posting just outrageous things on the "dog" board lately. You read enough "I only smacked him" posts and you think EVERYBODY is beating their dog!

I will bet that she didn't read through what went on between the first and last posts.

Again - not defending but attempting to explain. (Starbuck, hope I'm not stepping on your toes but I get the feeling that this is exactly what happened.)

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Originally Posted by Tippytoo

OK Shame on me on me! I didn't beat him. It was a smack like with newspaper.

And if you read any of the other entries, I am trying to make his life a good one.

Maybe you should offer some helpful suggestions instead!

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You are trying to make his life better by hitting him with things, tying him up, confining him to a bathroom, oh but you had a night light, and a little music for him. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind why this dog is biting! You never, and I mean NEVER hit a dog. Whether it be with a newspaper, flyswatter, your hands... etc. What exactly do you think it is teaching this dog, and what do you think you will accomplish by this method? You are teaching him to be aggressive, that's is exactly what you are teaching him. Have you ever had a dog before? You are teaching him the absolute opposite of the result you are trying to obtain.

What do you think you would do, if you one day someone came into your home, took you away from your mothers lap, put you into a house with screaming children, tied you up, hit you, confined you, and likely screamed at you, and blamed you for not acting the way they expected. Would be a pretty different life wouldn't it? What kind of a life is that?

I'm not saying that the children in your care should not be bitten, but what you are doing is ensuring that they will! I did give you a suggestion! Find a foster home for this dog, where he has a LOVING and caring environment. This is not loving. This is not how a dog should live. They give so much to us, and this is the treatment they get in return, only because they don't understand why they were taken away from the person they loved, and thrown into a house of terror, because that is likely what it feels like to him.

Thank You for trying to understand my situationand for your support. I am really not a bad person. Unfortunately I know what I did was not the best option that is why I asked for help. I don't want to do the wrong thing anymore that is why I have asked for help.

I love the dog, but I have to also protect the kids I watch. What is your opinion on muzzles? I know some dog trainers say to use them if the dog shows aggression, but I'm not sure how I feel about them? It would allow me to let the dog be free more during the day.

Again, thank you.

Okay, first let me say that I did get very emotional when answering, because I had tears rolling down my face when I read this. I have seen dogs die from being literally depressed and just mourning so horribly, by missing someone they spent so much time with. Then when I read that you hit him and confined him, my heart just ached for him. I'm happy he still gets visits with your mom. Just please don't hit him with anything anymore okay? It will make him afraid and aggressive.

No one wants to see the children bitten. I would certainly try a muzzle. There are ones you can get that aren't so confining to the dogs mouth, yet they can't bite. What kind of dog is he? There may be some other training techniques and other methods to use, so that he doesn't miss your mom so much, and so he can adapt to his new environment.

I appologize, I read back and realized you did mention the breed.

Thank You. I am heartsick too. I hate that he is missing my mom. I cry often and pray to my dad for guidance.

He is an American Toy Terrier.

I'm sorry, we did get off on the wrong foot here. I guess you do have a lot to deal with. My condolences for your father, and what you are having to deal with going to the home to see your mother. Parkinsons is a very difficult thing. I'm glad she is happy to see her pup when you take him.

Let me take a few minutes and think of a few other alternatives.