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-   -   Constant masturbation (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=330452)

  • Mar 17, 2009, 12:53 PM
    inezschips
    Constant masturbation
    My husband is 47 and masterbates watching porn flicks on internet constantly,when he could come to bed with me.I am concerned because I have teens that could catch him
  • Mar 17, 2009, 12:58 PM
    wotwotoldchap
    This is problematic and indicates that the two of you need to talk. This behaviour is more in keeping with a teenager or young adult. It may be a sign that he is insecure of having some class of crisis. You must confront him about this, but do this in a loving way and be open to the two of you going to a professional.
  • Mar 17, 2009, 01:34 PM
    chrissymarie

    He definitely has an addiction to porn. Counseling or therapy is the only way out of this. Tell him since he's been caught by your teens watching porn it is no longer allowed in your home because if one of your teens opens their mouth up to the wrong person you will have CPS at your house in no time.
  • Mar 17, 2009, 01:49 PM
    nikosmom
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by chrissymarie View Post
    He definitely has an addiction to porn. Counseling or therapy is the only way out of this. Tell him since he's been caught by your teens watching porn it is no longer allowed in your home because if one of your teens opens their mouth up to the wrong person you will have CPS at your house in no time.

    I disagree with this because the OP never said that her teens caught her husband watching porn. Also, watching porn is not cause to be investigated by CPS.

    OP, have you discussed your feelings with your husband? What does "constantly" mean- every night, most nights or throughout the day when he should be working? Many adults in loving relationships enjoy porn on occasion because it allws them to fantasize. However, if you feel it's interfering with the two of you having a normal sex life, then you may need to seek counseling. Many people also masturbate even if they are in a sexually fulfilling relationship, they just may need an extra release. Try talking to him first.
  • Mar 17, 2009, 01:58 PM
    chrissymarie

    Ok I read the OP's question wrong. I thought your teens had already caught him. But if they do CPS would get involved if the kids mention it to the wrong person. Adult films are for people 18 and up.
  • Mar 17, 2009, 02:23 PM
    Synnen

    Disconnect the internet.

    That will get his attention long enough to talk to him about it.
  • Mar 18, 2009, 02:10 PM
    Choux

    Porn is about giving quick orgasms for men while they masturbate.

    One of the benefits of porn for a man is that the women are fantasy women... looks, endurance, passivity, and so on. No porn queen complains about stuff to their man... I guess you get my point here.

    I think that you both should go to some couple's counselling asap and get to the problem of the breakdown of your marriage. Inner resentments, perhaps, which kill any sexual desire for the partner.

    Best wishes in the future, :)
  • Mar 23, 2009, 04:45 PM
    scottmc77
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by inezschips View Post
    my husband is 47 and masterbates watching porn flicks on internet constantly,when he could come to bed with me.i am concerned because i have teens that could catch him

    If he does this constantly he is addicted and needs to get help.
  • Mar 23, 2009, 06:48 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    I will agree he has a serous problem,
    If

    1. he is doing it "all the time"
    2. he is doing it in a area that is not private like his bedroom

    If he is doing it in the living room or other common area, it is obvious he does not care if the teens see or catch him. Since obvously you have.
    And my guess is that the teens may know, hard to hide things from them also.

    My suggestion, put a porn blocker on the computer today, so he just can not see it at home.
  • Mar 24, 2009, 05:35 AM
    stevetcg
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    I will agree he has a serous problem,
    if

    1. he is doing it "all the time"
    2. he is doing it in a area that is not private like his bedroom

    If he is doing it in the living room or other common area, it is obvious he does not care if the teens see or catch him. since obvously you have.
    And my guess is that the teens may know, hard to hide things from them also.

    My suggestion, put a porn blocker on the computer today, so he just can nto see it at home.

    Chuck, this is always your answer. Porn blocking software is not designed or intended to control the acvities of adults, who are allowed to watch whatever they choose.

    I think the Op needs to define "constant"

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