Does she have feelings after so long?
Hi everyone I'm new to this so sorry if this is reoccuring. I will summarize as best I can. I am a freshman in a college 2 hours away from my hometown. The girl that I will be talking about is still a senior in high school, in my home town. We broke up because her best friend flirted with me non stop. Eventually, after being together for five months and having the mindset that every senior in high school gets "i want to go out and have fun" I unconsciously flirted back. In the beginning I told her friend to just go away but me being the idiot I am let her get to me. It took me about 3 months to look back and realize I actually did flirt with her. In short we broke up because of her friend, but it was because of my stupidity. I wanted to have fun but was not dumb enough to give up something as good as with this girl that I was dating. I was stupid to flirt with her friend and admit it.
She after we broke up starting going out with another guy, and to this day, a year later, they are together. About a month ago, my ex messaged me over myspace (this being how everyone in my generation talks to each other lol) and she wanted to clear everything up between us. I thought it weird thinking it was a joke but went ahead anyway. We began talking and it was great. I apologized for being an idiot with her friend and I regret it all the time. She told me that her friend told her that I considered her friend my first love instead of her and that was, she said, about 70% of why we broke up. She told me that she wishes things would have worked out, and she finds herself wondering every now and then what would have happened if her friend got out of our lives sooner (because of events about 4 months ago my ex and her "best friend" don't even talk anymore"). She told me that she knows it could have been something and she really did love me. She told me she wanted to see me when I'm home because she misses me but until this time I have made up reasons to not see her.
My problem is this. I would love to get back together with her. I would love to be able to fix things because I have been with a lot of girls since then and nothing compared to what I felt for her. The thing is I would never consider breaking them up. I am not that low of a person to try to do that because I wouldn't want the ex of my girlfriend to do that to me. My question is should I even try to see her? She keeps asking to hang out but I keep telling her I can't or I'm busy because I don't want to cause trouble between her and her boyfriend. If I could have her for myself I would but not destroy someone for my benefit... im not like that. I just want to know how I should proceed. I figured I would wait and see if they ever break up.. then ill know and maybe after a few months move in but until then, anyone have any advice on how to proceed? Thanks for the help : )
How to get through letting someone you love go so they can be happy.
Threads merged and edited
I let her go before and I think that I need to do the same now. I will be coming home for summer soon and she said she wants to get together and discuss more thoroughly everything that happened. Should I tell her I still love her? Should I tell her that I let her go and want nothing but for her to be happy even if its not with me? Or should I tell her nothing. I knew she would be better off hating me for what happened (rightly so) and get on with life rather than be confused because I changed. I am just confused on how I should proceed. Thanks for any help.