Ask Me Help Desk - This girl I'm chasing has a boyfriend

This girl I'm chasing has a boyfriend

All right, I met this girl in my college class about a week ago, and we started hitting it off. Proir to me talking to her I knew she had a boyfriend so I was ready for this. The first night she got my number she texted me and we talked and what not. She said she wanted to sleep with me and ended up begging me to coem over at 3 in the mourning. I dident go I blew her off saying no well do it another night. The next day we talked and she said she dident want to lead me on and . But that night she told me to come she her and we ended up kissing. (shes had a boyfriend for 9 months) and then we've been talked for about 2 hours aday on the phone and probably around 200 texts. About 4 days after our first kiss she came over my house and we kissed more and fooled around a bit. I'm starting to feel this girl.. But do you think I'm getting played by her or she into me?

I'd give the same advice if the tables were turned and it was a girl asking about a guy...

1. She is off limits because she is already in a relationship.

2. If she is genuinely interested in you, then she wouldn't be trying to have you as a side dish.

The thing is you say you're starting "to feel her" but it seems like she's trying to have her cake and eat it too. She has a boyfriend yet she's keeping you on the side. How is that fair to you? Walk away before you get in any deeper.

And honestly if she hooks up with you while she has a boyfriend, would you ever truly trust her? Who's to say she wouldn't pull the same thing 9 months into your relationship...

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Nikosmom;1601600, I'd give the same advice if the tables were turned and it was a girl asking about a guy...

2. If she is genuinely interested in you, then she wouldn't be trying to have you as a side dish.

This is true but then again I've only just started talking to her a week ago. I don't think that one week of talking to her would make her want to leave her boyfriend of 9 months. Im thinking I should lay low, chill with her when she wants and hook up with her every so often to keep that spark there. Im not going to go out of my way for her ill still do my thing with other girls. Show her I don't need her blow her off some more. People have tendesiys to want something more that they can't have, I think. Think that's a good idea?

Your playing.. because you know she has a boyfriend...
She is playing because she has a boyfriend...
Yep everybody is playing... games...

Edit... In other wards stay away from this girl. Its only trouble.

Honestly Weezy, I'd never advise playing games. Not a good way to start a relationship. Even if it's only been a week, you said she's invited you over a few times. So if she's only known you a week or so and she's already "begged you to sleep with her and come over at 3 in the morning". You also said the two of you have fooled around and kissed. I'm just saying that I wouldn't think that you'd ever be able to trust her; if this "situation" ever progressed to you two being in a relationship.

I definitely think you should do your own thing and leave her alone. But you sound like you already have your mind made up that you want to hook up with her when it's convenient regardless of the fact that she already has a boyfriend. :confused:

Well, yeah I feel bad and all but she's slamming I can't help myself. I don't know her boyfriend and its nothing personal I just like spending time with her. But yeah I know she'd cheat on me in a second if we were going out. She claims I'm the first guy she cheated on her boyfriend with but I donno. She seems to be all talk about sleepign with me the first night. We have had several chances to, I haven't really pushed for it so I donno.. ill probably just do my thing and drop it. Maybe because she's board with her relationship and wants some exictement?

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Originally Posted by weezyfbaby5

Well, yeah I feel bad and all but she's slamming I can't help myself. I don't know her boyfriend and its nothing personal I just like spending time with her. But yeah I know she'd cheat on me in a second if we were going out. She claims I'm the first guy she cheated on her boyfriend with but I donno. She seems to be all talk about sleepign with me the first night. We have had several chances to, I haven't really pushed for it so I donno.. ill probably just do my thing and drop it. Maybe because she's board with her relationship and wants some exictement?

Both of you have no morals. I am not going to just rag about her and say you are innocent. I don't care if you are young. The fact that you are in here questioning your actions should be your answer. This girl should break up with this boyfriend. After that she can do whoever she wants! You are not serious with her and she isn't with you either but there is a 3rd person who is involved and unaware. I truly feel sorry for him.

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ill probably just do my thing and drop it.

DESPICABLE.

She's just a downright cheater , and if you pursue this then your no better!!

Two wrong don't make it right. I think their living in a 90210 espiode(the original version).

[QUOTE=weezyfbaby5;1601604]

Quote:

Originally Posted by nikosmom

I'd give the same advice if the tables were turned and it was a girl asking about a guy...

2. If she is genuinely interested in you, then she wouldn't be trying to have you as a side dish.

This is true but then again ive only just started talkign to her a week ago. I dont think that one week of talking to her would make her wanna leave her boyfriend of 9 months. Im thinking i should lay low, chill with her when she wants and hook up with her every so often to keep that spark there. Im not gonna go out of my way for her ill still do my thing with other girls. show her i dont need her blow her off some more. People have tendesiys to want something more that they can't have, i think. think thats a good idea?

Seriously, this is your plan. Well plans have a way of backfiring. If this is your plan than why are you worrying about if your getting played? I guess the two of you will toy with each other until someone get bored. Use condoms!

[QUOTE=liz28;1601639]

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Originally Posted by weezyfbaby5

Use condoms!

Hahah that's funny stuff right there. Good looking out

[QUOTE=weezyfbaby5;1601644]

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Originally Posted by liz28

hahah thats funny stuff right there. good looking out

Your welcome and be on the look out for her boyfriend because some people tend to get mad at the other person rather than the person their with.

I guess college must be fun.

weezyfbaby5
Comments on this post
Jesushelper76 disagrees: JA

I think you hit it on the nail with that one.

[QUOTE=weezyfbaby5;1601644]

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Originally Posted by liz28

hahah thats funny stuff right there. good looking out

You don't seem to be treating this real seriously??

She cheats on him, she will cheat on you. Wonder who dumps who first. Wonder who gets hurt. Wonder if your having fun with this game?

As someone who has cheated in the past (no I am not proud of it but it happened) You will get hurt.

So will she and most of all the unsuspectimg SOB who hasn't a notion what's going on.

Get out now, you will kick yourself for this later, when your in a relationship and you realise how much it would hurt if someone was doing this to you.

Grow a backbone and stand up for the morals that have to be somewhere there inside you.

This is not going to end well for you, sure the girl is wrong in this but so are you. Knowing the girl has a boyfriend and still pursuing, I sure hope you can take a punch because when the boyfriend finds out, he's going to come looking for you.

Do you really have no self respect to "hit it and dump it" Hopefully you grow out of this immature behavior because mature, respectable women do not like guys who have this reputation.

Quote:

Originally Posted by weezyfbaby5

This is true but then again ive only just started talkign to her a week ago. I dont think that one week of talking to her would make her wanna leave her boyfriend of 9 months. Im thinking i should lay low, chill with her when she wants and hook up with her every so often to keep that spark there. Im not gonna go out of my way for her ill still do my thing with other girls. show her i dont need her blow her off some more. People have tendesiys to want something more that they can't have, i think. think thats a good idea?

To clarify, my agreeing with you in the comments box was a mistake it was intended for another persons post. Sorry about that.

Depends how serious you are about this girl... but it doesn't seem like you like her all that much since you're willing to be the guy that she cheats with. If you really liked her, you would have had more restraint and respected that she has a boyfriend.

She's obviously a cheater, so nothing serious can happen with this girl anyway, so go from there...