Me and my ex girlfriend recently split. Basically we were having a few arguments, mainly because afeter 5 months living rent free with me she STILL didn't get a job. So we talked and I thought it was all sorted. Her parents have a bar in spain and she was asked to go over there and work for a couple of weeks. So we talked and basically agreed it was going to be hard but that we'd be OK. Then she left. She took everything and left me with her debts. Next thing I know she has apparently shacked up with another dude the night before her flight out, and she doesn't know what she wants anymore. It gets worse. Next I see her on Facebook sending him lovey dovey messages. It Starts to feel planned. I call her and ask what's happening and she says that we were finished the minute she left to go to spain. She is now planning to live with this guy she mat on Facebook only 2 weeks previosly. I feel like I neglected her, because I was stressed about cash and her not working and at times I pushed her away but my love never changed. She tells me she wanted excitement and not to be moaned at for not working. I'm angry because in my eyes I did nothing much wrong, and I feel that our 15month relationship was not ruined by my stress and money worries but by her attention seeking and flirting online. Does anyone think I am to blame, or have I done the right thing by changinmg my number and severing all ties now she's gone, oh and I sent her bills to follow her. So ? Any opinions?

Your not to blame. It is better to find out what kind of person she is now then later down the road. Sounds like she shacks up pretty easily the minute things get rough. Its time to move on, and know that your better off without her.

What kind of debts did she leave you with. That is another major questionable act. Sounds like maybe planned. You probably have no way to recover that do you?

Cut your losses. Changing your phone number , etc... You did good...

Hi Hank, Sorry to hear about your split. Based off your story I think that you are not to blame. Better now than never to find out how cold hearted she was. If anything you were to nice in paying her way, especially how hard it is economy wise. Good for you for changing your number and forwarding her bills. Shame on her to think that she could just leave you with her debts. You can and I'm sure will do better. Stay strong and hang in there, you will be fine.

Thanks for the advice... im still hurting bad because this all happened 3wks ago and I dragged it out practically begging for her to come back, but yknow what? She doesn't deserve me. Oh and I've passed her new address to the debt collectors so hopefully at least her mess will catch up with her

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Originally Posted by arnimal7

Hi Hank, Sorry to hear about your split. Based off of your story I think that you are not to blame. Better now than never to find out how cold hearted she was. If anything you were to nice in paying her way, especially how hard it is economy wise. Good for you for changing your number and forwarding her bills. Shame on her to think that she could just leave you with her debts. You can and I'm sure will do better. Stay strong and hang in there, you will be fine.

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Thanks hun... cute pic lol ta for the kind advice x

You got played my dear. She shacked up with you until the cash cow ran dry, and now she's onto her next shack up. It sounds to me like she only wanted a Sugar Daddy.

I'm sorry that she did that to you. You have NOTHING to be sorry for. This was about her, and not you. Just count your blessings that this relationship didn't last for 18 months and 1 day... or longer. She didn't deserve you, and you did the right thing by changing your number.

I doubt she will take care of any of the bills you've forwarded, so I'm sorry to say that this is a hard lesson learned. Pay the bills, and protect your credit. Next time you will know what to watch for, and know not to support someone who is just living with you.

Find someone that isn't a gold digger, and contributes something to a respectful relationship. All women are not like her. Just be a little more selective, and you will find someone.

You are not the one at fault here. Sorry she couldn't handle a strong supporting man that tried to encourage her to grow up and act like an adult by getting a job. She didn't want that because she's spoiled and wants to be taking care of and when she saw that you wouldn't be her sugar daddy anymore she ran out and found a new one.

But hey you live and you learn. And I hope you learned that you make a lazy person have ambition. That is a tool that one must already have.

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Originally Posted by starbuck8

You got played my dear. She shacked up with you until the cash cow ran dry, and now she's onto her next shack up. It sounds to me like she only wanted a Sugar Daddy.

I'm sorry that she did that to you. You have NOTHING to be sorry for. This was about her, and not you. Just count your blessings that this relationship didn't last for 18 months and 1 day....or longer. She didn't deserve you, and you did the right thing by changing your number.

I doubt she will take care of any of the bills you've forwarded, so I'm sorry to say that this is a hard lesson learned. Pay the bills, and protect your credit. Next time you will know what to watch for, and know not to support someone who is just living with you.

Find someone that isn't a gold digger, and contributes something to a respectful relationship. All women are not like her. Just be a little more selective, and you will find someone.

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Thanks you are all right I was taken for a ride.. the hardest thing is that it didn't start that way but hey... Shes going to be the one who has the bad credit since all the bills are for shopping catalogs that she failed to pay and hence have HER name attached...
Phew!!

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Originally Posted by HankMarvin

Thanks you are all right i was taken for a ride..the hardest thing is that it didnt start out that way but hey.....Shes gonna be the one who has the bad credit since all the bills are for shopping catalogs that she failed to pay and hence have HER name attached...
phew!!!!!

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Well that's a good thing, and I hope they hunt her down. The rest of us shouldn't have to pay more taxes because she is an irresponsible person who doesn't have a job, and orders things without the money to pay for them. :rolleyes:

Again, I'm really sorry that you have to go through this, but count yourself lucky that you didn't marry her, and have her take you for half of what you're worth... along with charging up the credit cards and using your money.

I don't think she changed. She just didn't show her true colors until she was ready to move on. It's a harsh and cruel reality. That really sucks for you to find out what she is really like, and how she can treat someone who supported and trusted her. We all live and learn, and hopefully we get the lesson the first time around.

Good luck in your future relationships. Try not to be jaded, just because of one girl.

Not your fault at all , and sounds like your far better off without her , she doesn't deserve you.

Go buy a Lottery ticket , this is your lucky month.

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Originally Posted by friend4u178

Not your fault at all , and sounds like your far better off without her , she doesn't deserve you.

Go buy a Lottery ticket , this is your lucky month.

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!! I might just do that matey... nice one.

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Originally Posted by HankMarvin

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!!!! i might just do that matey....nice one.

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See

The world goes on!!

Good Luck Buddy ;)

Not only have you done the right things, you have removed a huge burden from your life. WELL DONE!!