Hey there. My boyfriend always wants to go out on the weekends with his friend and drink. Usually not asking me to go. I got tired of it and started complaining. Here recently he decided we need to take a break. He said that he loved me and wanted to be with me but he wanted me to leave him alone. He won't answer my phone calls and when I do talk to him he gets an attitude and hangs up on me. He doesn't want to see me either. All he does is goes to his friends house and drinks and play video games. Then a week or so after we started the break I kissed one of my friends. I thought he had the right to know so I told him and he was furious. I know it was a mistake and I apologized over and over. And when I try to talk to him about anything he never wants to talk and says "i have nothing to say" so I have no clue what to do!!

Stop calling him, move on, give him his space and his drinking time. He obviously prefers to drink and be with his mates right now, rather then be with you.
So let him have that.
Stop contacting and chasing him and move on.
Why would you want to be with someone anyway who all as they do is drink and play video games. Sounds like a mature person...
Regardelss of this, it doesn't sound like it was too much of a relationship anyway if you were ready to kiss someone else the next week.
There is no respect here from either party it seems so I say move on! Stop all contact and improve yourself.

And that bs about loving you but needing to be elft alone. c'mon... if that isn't the biuggest load of crap line ever then I don't know what is. Right up there with I love you but I'm not in love with you. Those lines are an insult to clear thinking people intelligence. BUt often when we are in a relationship we aren't thinking clearly!

Sorry, I probably sound very blunt and too the point... I'm not in the best mood myself today but really its time to look at this in its proper light and realise there isn't much worth fighting for here! Let him go drink!

Frankly it doesn't sound like he's very interested in you. I'd just forget about him and move on. Do what you want, see whomever you want and kiss whomever you want. But don't call him to tell him about it. That just seems like gloating. That is no doubt why he became so angry when you called to tell him about it. Actually I wouldn't call or contact him at all. If you must be in his presence, such as at school, be cordial but not overly friendly. Just say 'hello" and move on, as though he's a stranger to you. It sounds like you were interested in this guy but the feeling wasn't mutual. Write this one off and move on with your life.

I mean we're still dating I guess. The only reason I told him is that I love him and I thought that he should know. I feel so bad for doing it. We've been going out for almost a year and we've known each other since like age 8 or so. When we're together we're fine we laugh and talk and stuff but when he's around his stupid friends, he changes and I don't like that. That's probably why I don't want him to hang around with them he ignores me and all this other stuff... thanx for answering my post guys I'm really going to think about what you said.

You have no right to ask him to stop being with his friends whether you agree with what he does with them or not. It is his choice and I'm sure you have made your feeling known that you don't like what he does with them, but you can never force him to stop being friends with them.
That is his choice alone to make. It appears though that he has made his choice and it doesn't involve you.

How are you still dating can I ask? He asked you for space and told you he doesn't want to see you... that doesn't sound like dating!

He said it to you. He has nothing to say. Don't keep chasing him. It will only end up meaning more pain and you won't get the answers you are after.

I think you are young? Are you. I would just enjoy being young and not worry about this guy so much. Of course it is going to hurt but you just have to move on. In time the pain will get less and less!

And the best way to do this for now is stop chasing him!

Let him go!

He doesn't want anything to do with you.
He would rather go to friends houses and drink and play video games when you are together.
Why would you want to be with someone like that anyway?
Cut the ties and move on.
You hurt him although I'm not sure how if you were on a break.
MOVE ON.

You are in high school/ first year of college maybe? Seriously, you guys are BROKEN-UP. There is no longer any communication between you two. What you're doing and what he's doing are no longer the indication of a relationship.

I think you're young. IT'S OVER. Sorry to be harsh, but there is not ONE THING that leads me to believe it's not. You guys are DONE.

Don't worry about forgetting him. Worry about getting yourself out of the gutter. You WON'T just forget him. And he won't just FORGET YOU. But that doesn't mean you guys will BE TOGETHER.

It TOTALLY SUCKS!! We all know that. Everyone single one of us knows how much IT SUCKS. But go beyond your age, and take the first step. Acknowledge that it's OVER. Step two for you is living by that. NO MORE CALLS, EMAILS, NO CONTACT.

Man, when my high school girlfriend and I broke-up, IT SUCKED. But I survived. YOU WILL TOO! Trust me, in the long run, THIS RELATIONSHIP for you, will be nothing more that a memory. COUNT ON THAT.

Oh, and in future, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, tell someone you were intimate with, that you HELD HANDS, KISSED, and beyond, WITH SOMEONE ELSE. Even if THEY broke up with you, they DON'T WANT TO KNOW THAT. EVER.

Get rid of this massive jerk.

He won't be with you on the weekends?? And you call him a boyfriend??

Find a REAL MAN! That wants to be with you.

Send this KID to the dumpster.

Why waste another once of emotions on the piece of dung.

Move on - plus he probably is seeing someon else if he isn't seeing you on weekends.

This is NO BOYFRIEND.

You might have known him as a friend for years, but that doesn't mean he still can't be a jerk.

He's acting more like a boy and less than a man... and for a while, that is a prerogative that's his to take, if he's young. The expense of that decision is losing you, and he's weighed the cost.

I think you need to be done apologizing for anything. You want to kiss another guy. Fine. What right does he have to hold you at bay and at the same time expect your loyalty.

He needs to really lose you. As in you are done with head games and you are moving on. He might come around and see what is important, but you need to not live waiting for that.

Again, he's less of a man and more of a boy, and that's not enough for you anymore. Its OK. Just don't waste a lot of time trying to change him. It won't work. There are other guys out there who are less self absorbed... granted I think most of us guys are idiots until we hit mid to later 20's.

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Originally Posted by xxburningstarsxx

hey there. my boyfriend always wants to go out on the weekends with his friend and drink. usually not asking me to go. i got tired of it and started complaining. here recently he decided we need to take a break. he said that he loved me and wanted to be with me but he wanted me to leave him alone. he wont answer my phone calls and when i do talk to him he gets an attitude and hangs up on me. he doesn't want to see me either. all he does is goes to his friends house and drinks and play video games. then a week or so after we started the break i kissed one of my friends. i thought he had the right to know so i told him and he was furious. i know it was a mistake and i apologized over and over. and when i try to talk to him about anything he never wants to talk and says "i have nothing to say" so i have no clue what to do!!!

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I got half way through reading your post and made my final decission!
Sorry my dear but I don't believe he loves you.
Answer this - How can someone say they love you and want to be with you BUT on the other hand wanted you to leave them alone???
How contraversial is that!!
Forget him, stay away from him - he is only going to hurt you more, read his signals properly.

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Originally Posted by xxburningstarsxx

i mean we're still dating i guess. the only reason i told him is that i love him and i thought that he should know. i feel so bad for doing it. we've been going out for almost a year and we've known each other since like age 8 or so. when we're together we're fine we laugh and talk and stuff but when he's around his stupid friends, he changes and i don't like that. that's probably why i don't want him to hang around with them he ignores me and all this other stuff....thanx for answering my post guys i'm really gonna think about what you said.

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No sweety, you are NOT still dating.
Don't feel bad for kissing someone else, your ex doesn't need to know what you do and who you snog anymore, it isn't his business.

How old are you and how long were you datin your ex for?

Walk away and have no contact with him and NO, you are not dating nor are you friends forget it. You can't let him treat you anyway he wants and all you do is take it. Are you crazy? Accept that you deserve better and loose the jerk. Or crawl back to him for some more abuse, He will not change so forget it. NO CONTACT.

I would like you to look at exactly what it is about you that makes you think you deserve this kind of treatment... because I see in the way you posted that you do. You don't need to answer me or post it here, just think about it long and hard. It is important, not to make you feel crappy either, skip that part if possible, you feel crappy enough as it is. But you need to identify it since you cannot change what you cannot identify. Until you change this element of you, this type of guy will very likely continue to line up on you. I am not kidding. The problem starts with who you attract and say yes to and there are lots of guys like this one out there. You can't play the victim in this when you had a hand in it. Besides, if you do play the victim, you sentence yourself to being stuck in it, guaranteeing it will repeat and repeat and repeat until you do get the lesson. Now is the time to ask yourself if you are going to be the little girl in this, claim it wasn't your fault, change nothing and yet expect different results next time by magic or be grown up and own up to the fact that your taste in men needs a major make over. So the question is: are you a doormat or a phenomenal woman -- cos' you don't get to be both.