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-   -   Trying to find my husbands birth family (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=323365)

  • Feb 28, 2009, 11:34 PM
    ashleyandtodd
    Trying to find my husbands birth family
    I am try to find out how I can try to find my husbands birth family we have very little information on his adoption he was born 02-11-1974 and we believe he was about 3 months old when he was adopted we know he was adopted from shreveport Louisiana but that's all the information we have his adopted family will not help us in this search they will not give us any information
  • Mar 1, 2009, 08:28 AM
    Synnen

    Has his adopted family given a reason for not giving information? They may know something that could be hurtful to your husband if he pursues a search--or it may be that they are scared by it, for fear of losing "their" son. This is definitely something that they need to address together, or there will be very hard feelings later.

    As far as a search, you have 3 free-ish options and one expensive option. Your husband has to be the one to do this, though. You have absolutely no connection, and most places are not going to allow you to get what is essentially HIS personal information.

    1. Contact the adoption agency used (or contact ALL adoption agencies in the area of Shreveport that were in existence in 1974--I'm betting there weren't all that many) and ask if you can leave a letter for a birthparent who may be searching, and ask if there is a letter in return. Leave your contact information with them. This sometimes costs a little money--usually under $100.

    2. Contact the courthouse in the county he was adopted. Ask to leave a letter for birthparents who may be looking for a reunion. Ask if there is a letter there for him from them. Again, this may cost a little money.

    3. Register at online reunion sites like adoption.com, adoption.org, and ISSR. This is almost always free.

    4. Hire a private investigator. This is going to get VERY expensive, with no guarantee of results.

    Your husband needs to examine WHY he is looking for a reunion. I never condemn people for doing so, but there is also the idea that his birthparents may not WANT to be contacted. I really suggest getting counseling PRIOR to any reunion to make sure you know why you are looking.
  • Mar 1, 2009, 08:34 AM
    Fr_Chuck

    Beyond posting the info on the 100 or so adoption connection sites there is little you can do without more information.

    Also normally his current birth certificate will still show the actual hospital and date of birth, so check newspapers for that time frame for a week or two after to see if the birth was listed

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