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-   -   This is what I like about the south. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=323028)

  • Feb 28, 2009, 12:22 AM
    KISS
    This is what I like about the south.
    This is what I like about the South:
    Tennessee
    The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an
    Invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some
    Mathematical help. He called her into his office and said,
    'You graduated from the University of Tennessee and
    I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%,
    How much would you take off?'

    The secretary thought a moment, and then replied,
    'Everything but my earrings.'

    Alabama
    A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired
    Off in twoʼs for the day. That night, one of the hunters
    Returned alone, staggering under the weight of an
    Eight-point buck. 'Where's Henry?' the others
    Asked.

    'Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of
    Miles back up the trail,' the successful hunter replied.

    'You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer
    Back?' they inquired.

    'A tough call,' nodded the hunter. 'But I
    Figured no one is going to steal Henry!'

    Texas
    The Sheriff pulled up next to the guy unloading garbage out
    Of his pick-up into the ditch. The Sheriff asked, 'Why
    Are you dumping garbage in the ditch? Don't you see that
    Sign right over your head'. 'Yep', he replied.
    'That's why I dumpin it here, cause it says
    'Fine For Dumping Garbage'.

    Louisiana
    A senior at LSU was overheard saying... 'When the end
    Of the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana .' When
    Asked why, he replied he'd rather be in Louisiana
    Because ev erything happens in Louisiana 20 years later
    Than in the rest of the civilized world.

    Mississippi
    The young man from Mississippi came running into the
    Store and said to his buddy, 'Bubba, somebody just stole
    Your pickup truck from the parking lot!'

    Bubba replied, 'Did you see who it was?'

    The young man answered, 'I couldn't tell, but I got
    His license number.'

    Georgia
    A Georgia State trooper pulled over a pickup on I- 75.
    The trooper asked, 'Got any I.D. '

    The driver replied, 'Bout whut?'

    North Carolina
    A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on
    The side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of
    Flowers in front of the car and one behind it.

    Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied the
    Scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and
    Went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was..

    The man replied, 'I have a flat tire.'

    The passerby asked, 'But what's with the
    Flowers?'

    The man responded, 'When you break down they tell you
    To put flares in the front and flares in the back. Hey, it
    Don't make no sense to me neither.. '

    South Carolina
    'You can say what you want about the South, but I
    Ain't never heard of anyone wanting to retire to the
    North
  • Feb 28, 2009, 05:29 AM
    frangipanis

    LOL!! They're brilliant..! Lol!
  • Feb 28, 2009, 04:20 PM
    friend4u178

    LOL... loved the first one :)
  • Feb 28, 2009, 08:03 PM
    twinkiedooter

    Loved them but you forgot Florida!!
  • Mar 2, 2009, 02:58 PM
    linnealand

    And Virginia!
  • Mar 2, 2009, 03:22 PM
    KC13
    W. Va. - "Uncle daddy, I'd like you to meet my cousband..."
  • Mar 2, 2009, 11:06 PM
    linnealand

    Teehee, I suppose that will have to do.

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