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-   -   What am I meant to do about my friends? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=318407)

  • Feb 17, 2009, 05:07 AM
    jennyxhowarth
    What am I meant to do about my friends?
    In the winter half term I was completely ignored by my "mates". I absolutely love them to bits, they are the funniest people I have ever met! Thing is I'm starting to wonder if they want to be my friend, they don't seem to care at all. Every time I called them up, they wouldn't answer or would make up an excuse. Then came new years eve, one of them has a big family party every year and this year she invited my 2 other mates and not me. :(
    I was really really upset and to be honest I think slightly depressed.
    So going back into school we all get on again, maybe not as good as we used to but I'm still getting on with them.
    And then yesterday, me and my mate had the funniest conversation ever over the phone, so much so I made her wet herself. I got asked to go out with them today, but so far nobodies called, and I've now called them all, no replies, there parents say their out.
    I think I really need to make new friends
    But I can't I can't imagine being mates with anyone else
    And my confidence has been knocked so much that I don't think I can make new friends
    Nobody else is like them, nobody else is like me, or even close to it apart from them.
    And what annoys me more is I don't even know what I've done wrong.

    I need some serious help, I don't know what to do anymore, it feels like it would be easier if I just died, see if they cared then! :D
  • Feb 17, 2009, 10:42 AM
    IheartEdward

    As simple as it sounds.. ask them and if they don't reply or make up and excuse you shouldn't waste you time on them. You love them to bits, I understand that, but they can't treat you like crap because your worth way more than that. Good luck with it, tell me how it goes.
  • Feb 17, 2009, 03:07 PM
    jennyxhowarth
    Okay , but ask them what exactly ?
    And all three of them at the same time , just one of them? or one by one ?
    Thanks for your help :)
  • Feb 18, 2009, 09:22 AM
    IheartEdward

    Well, personally I'd ask one because when they're together they can act up and be mean but when there's only one they'll feel bad and pressured to talk to you about. I know that sounds horrible but it's the way to do it.

    And just say something like 'can I ask why you guys never want to go out with you?' and if they say your being silly or something say 'then why did you invite me to the new years eve party'. Go on to tll them how ou really feel rejected from the group at times.
  • Feb 18, 2009, 03:38 PM
    13ecca

    First of all you aren't doing anything wrong. Unfortunately people change, sometimes for the worse.
    I can relate to you I went through this stage with my friends a few years back. I spoke to one of them about it and she said they didn't realise how I felt about it, so they all tried their hardest to include me but it didn't last. I've been through some hard times recently and I can honestly stay that my real friends have stuck by me. So if your "friends" are willing to leave you out of things then let drift off. The ones who really care about you will always be there.
    Also, about making new friends. I had a really hard time about new friends when I first went to college, I was scared about not seeing ym old friends as much and not meeting new friends, that are like my old friends. Sadly, to say, I have drifted apart from some old friends but again kept important ones to me, I have also made some new friends and although they aren't like my old friends I still like them because they are different and something new.
    If you love them as friends that much, then fight for them. But if they show no compassion, then they obviously don't value you in the same way and do not deserve your friendship.
    Chin up!

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