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I think that guys have it easier finding another girl after a breakup. Especially if they're the dumper? Guys usually "wine, dine and romance" the girl. If an average guy just watched a "chick flick" and imitated the lead character, they're pretty much golden.
What do you guys think? If you've been a dumper... If you've been a dumpee?
What do you girls think? If you've been a dumper... If you've been a dumpee?
Dumpee... and NO, I don't find it easier. I believe it is easier for the person who did the dumping, as the dumpee experiences a loss of self confidence for a time being... It is extremely hard to "find" someone else when you have low self esteem.
Male or Female doesn't matter... emotional state and sense of well being has everything to do with "finding" another girl/man.
I have to agree with kc, the person who will have the easiest time is usually the dumper, as the dumper is the one who has been emotional building a wall probably for some period and has had the most amount of time to deal with the emotions.
Makes sense that whoever has the most confidence in themselves will do the best. Although do you think that generally between guys and girls of the same level of confidence, that the guy can find a girl more quickly?Quote:
Originally Posted by kctiger
What does everyone think?
It seems like the average guy, as long as he can act like the lead character in a "chick flick" is set. All he really needs to do is "wine, dine, and romance the girl" and he's golden.
NO! Girls have all the power, PERIOD! If a girl wants to go out, and, pardon my expression ladies, get laid, SHE CAN... anytime. Guys, we don't have that power, no matter how good looking we are.
Really... Kctiger, you are so funny!
I speak the truth... trust me!
Depends on how deep in the relationship you are. I've been broken up with my ex for 3 1/2 months and I'm finally getting my confidence back and taking it slow with the girls I meet
Hmmm... I think this can go the other way as well you know...Quote:
Originally Posted by kctiger
At the end it is all about how confident you are, and how ready you are after a breakup
I also agree with others- it is normally harder for the one that got dumped- as you loose all your confidence and power for a while. In contrast the dumper has been thinking about the dumping and has already panned out PLAN B.
I think both sexes can find someone to fill their bed if that's all they want... but then again you may want to chew your arm off in the morning rather than wake the beast that looked like a beauty with beer goggles on, you no? (either, either, I think men and women have both been in this situation) :D
Women hardly have all the power in this world. But kctiger has a point. Young women looking for a relationship find it easier to find a new partner if they want one. Most of them don't know they have this power though.Quote:
Originally Posted by kctiger
In fact, just to throw this out there, in my experience, it's men who are most likely to want to get married or otherwise nail down a relationship quickly. They may or may not want to commit, but they work very hard to get the woman to commit.
But I also agree that the dumper recovers faster than the dumpee all other things being equal.
I don't know I was the dumper and I'm still eff'd!
neverme, maybe you weren't really the dumper? Some people basically drive you to dump them so they won't have to be the dumper. Then they walk away without guilt and you feel like a train wreck?
What world are you living in?Quote:
Originally Posted by teastalk
No, my decision. My dumping, just going through a bad patch, saw them with the new 'friend' on V night. Not so great but sure you'll have that?
Also got the barman's number though so not all bad ;)
That sucks!Quote:
Originally Posted by asking
Ya its true though, it does happen!
Dumpee, and my ex was with another guy the same week. I took time to heal and worked on myself. Lack of confidence has never really been an issue for me as I am a "social butterly" and my fiancé calls me, and can pretty much adapt to any situation and strike up conversations with anyone.
I think the person who recovers the most quick, usually the dumper, finds it easier to "replace" the connection they had
I think it's farrr easier for a girl to find a new fella.. reason being, if the girl is even half pretty, all they have to do is throw them at a fella and that's it.
For us fellas, it is a lot more difficult.. we have to put in all the effort in order to get anywhere with a girl and if you've just been dumped, your confidence isn't going to be very high so this is quite difficult to do and it's hard to motivate yourself.
The one who copes with the break up the best moves on faster.
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