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-   -   I think I made a mistake (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=316456)

  • Feb 12, 2009, 03:53 AM
    Mirlla
    I think I made a mistake
    Hello
    -Sorry this might be kind of long-
    There's this guy that I met online that goes to my school and we became friends and we have a lot in common but he's really into studying like he doesn't think about relationships or anything like that... we met at school once because I had a quiz and he said he'll teach me and then he was really nervous around me... after that we continued to talk online and once he told me about a show and that he was going.. I told him I would like to go but there is no one to go with so he invited me to go with him... we went there and it was really fun and still we continued to talk online.. but every time I'm the one who starts a conversation with him, just once when I ignored him for a week he talked to me... last week I went to play tennis with my friends and he was there.. after I finished he was still playing with his friends but then when he saw me he asked me to join them so I did. Well I'm trying to explain what is bothering me now... yesterday I asked him if he likes to bowl and he said yeah but he doesn't play bowling a lot so I said "i might invite you someday and I wrote lol and a smiley face... his answer was: k
    He didn't say anything else... so I don't know if he actually likes me or not and by asking him this question I may even ruined our friendship... I know it might be a stupid question but I'm not expert in these stuff :( and I don't know if I blew it off or not.. so was it OK to ask him that :confused:... when I ask my other guy friends for out their answer is normal like yeah sure.. or that'll be fun... but I don't know about him... he doesn't have any female friends so please can you help :(
  • Feb 12, 2009, 04:18 AM
    ardahk

    Just invite him out, he is a shy guy - he just needs a little nudge in the right direction... So far he is the only one who has instigated plans.

    First with teaching you our quiz thing
    Second asking you stay play tennis with

    He may have taken you ignoring him to mean that you weren't interested - this isn't a guy who will take the initiative right off from the get go, it will get easier the closer you two get, but for now he is just doing as much as you want - you bring up something he says yes, you hint at a quiz he asks if you need help..

    Give him little nudges in the right direction, show him that you are interested (dont be so forward, you need him to step up), once he sees this he will be more at ease - he obviously doesn't know much about girls or maybe he isn't that interested.

    Put it this way, I was pretty much like him - shy guy, waited for everything to happen and never took the initiative.

    My first kiss, girlfriend, sex everything was always started by the other person. Now I take the initiative and am no longer that shy guy.

    If you really like him, there is nothing wrong in letting him know that - you guys have a lot in common. You like him enough to come on here and ask. I am guessing you are in high school or such - why not go for it?

    P.S. Asking him to go bowling and his reply of 'k' is not going to ruin the friendship nor would it if you guys went out on a date and it wasn't the best. You guys gave it a shot, didn't work out like that, it worked best when you were friends.

    Let me know!
  • Feb 12, 2009, 04:32 AM
    talaniman

    How old are you? Doing fun things is what young people do, but don't get caught up in anything else, and keep enjoying the friendship. No one knows how he feels but him, but he has shown enough interest to have fun with.
  • Feb 12, 2009, 06:17 AM
    Romefalls19

    Have fun, enjoy the friendship level you guys are at. What's the rush?
  • Feb 12, 2009, 01:19 PM
    Mirlla
    We both are 19 & in college... well I'm not in a rush but I wasn't sure of our relationship and I was trying to be casual when I asked him for bowling but the awkward silence after he said 'k' that made me confused.. if I made a mistake or not... I just want him to know that I feel relaxed around him & I enjoy his company (I'm not going to say that I want him to know that I like him because it might freak him out)
  • Feb 12, 2009, 03:30 PM
    talaniman

    You don't have to tell him anything, just have fun, without the over thinking, high expectations, and getting carried away by those intense feelings, and rushing into something neither of you is ready for.

    Get to know each other, and see if a bond is built, and can you communicate effectively.
  • Feb 13, 2009, 12:30 AM
    Mirlla

    Thank you all :)

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